


Finding More Than Vengeance

by AlieLaur



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-22
Updated: 2017-03-04
Packaged: 2018-01-13 10:34:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 26
Words: 49,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1223113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlieLaur/pseuds/AlieLaur
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steady relationship building of Shep and Javik.</p><p>It was a bit disappointing - though not surprising - that a relationship wasn't included in the game. It certainly could be there, and that's what inspired me to reach out to other fans and write my own segments on what may have happened. There are many reasons I think they are compatible and that he would be a legit love interest. Mainly due to Shepard's experiences with the cipher and Prothean beacons. This becomes a huge focus in my story.<br/>Enjoy!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Retrieval

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A Prothean artifact has been discovered on the planet where it all started for Shepard, and Cerberus has it in their sights.

_No, I had to bring her. If anyone should be here, it's her.  
_ Shepard kept her gaze to the floor, contemplating to herself. _Forgive and forget._ Conflicted. _For now_. She thought maybe bringing her would atone for the harsh words exchanged last night. Or at least this new Prothean find would distract Liara enough that she wouldn't have to think about their crumbling relationship. They had both changed so much in these few years. Maybe leaving Earth so helpless had made her bitter? Or had what just happened to Kaidan on Mars pushed her to snap? Maybe they never really knew each other in the first place? She didn't know, but welcomed this mission to retrieve the Prothean artifact as a much needed distraction from the impending chaos.  
  
A part of her wanted revenge against Cerberus for nearly killing her good friend, but she wasn't about to let them get the upper hand in _any_ way regardless. If Cerberus was interested in this artifact; it could very well be helpful or even necessary for their newly-discovered Prothean super weapon dubbed 'The Crucible'.  
Liara had kept quiet and looked blankly towards the shuttle door. James could feel the underlying tension and feared if he even moved it could shatter. Until, finally; their destination. "Let's go," Shepard muttered, getting off of the shuttle as quickly as possible.  
  
  
It had been years since she had been to Eden Prime. It was beautiful, even with the eerie silence and smell of smoke in the air. James made small talk about the colony planet with Liara as Shepard lagged behind, taking in the sights while watching for signs of any Cerberus troops.  
It didn't take long before they reached the dig site- and the artifact they came to recover. It looked like a _coffin_ , she thought. The squad of three loomed over it, investigating. Shepard felt a warm tingle in her stomach. Liara had been tapping away at her omni-tool for a few moments. Her face went still; eyes wider than Shepard had ever seen them before.  
  
"This isn't an artifact... It's a _Prothean_." Liara merely whispered. She caught glimpse of Shepard's confused expression. "Shepard... there is a living Prothean inside of this pod. He has been preserved in stasis for _50,000 years_. Waiting for us." Her voice was shaking and moderately frantic. "We can't just open his pod, we will kill him. We need to find the command signal..-"  
  
A living Prothean: the last. The world around her seemed out of focus as overwhelming forces of emotion and unknown energy filled her. She felt a warming comfort filling a void she didn't know she had, brimming excitement to be privileged enough to meet an actual Prothean, curiosity of a new race she already felt so close to, and an oddly misplaced sharp fear of being alone. Some of how she felt couldn't even be described to herself in her own mind. She was confused and yet, borderline ecstatic.  
  
"We should check the nearby labs Cerberus took over... Wait.. Incoming!!" Liara got low into cover, as James dove behind a nearby crate. It took a moment for Shepard to realize what was happening. She shook her head and sprinted to a half-wall between Liara and James for cover. _Focus.  
_  
Only a small squad of troops dropped out of their shuttle. She struggled to focus as thoughts still occupied her mind. Assessing the situation to the best of her current ability, she threw out a modified combat drone to tear the enemies apart. A few shots from James and Liara finished them off and cleared their path. "This way." Shepard didn't hesitate and trudged confidently onward with direction.  
  
  
They reached a wide console with a single, large blinking monitor. She interacted with the controls, looking up at the screen hopefully. Again, the odd feeling overwhelmed her, but this time it forced her to close her eyes and slip into her mind. A vision _. Destruction brought on by reapers. Familiar words exchanged by what must have been Protheans. Collectors preparing to attack._ And then static. Her eyes opened abruptly; completely out of her control.  
  
"Shepard, what happened? There has just been static and garbled words playing on the console." Liara sounded worried.  
  
"You guys heard none of that?" Shepard blinked, confusion lingering from her experience.  
  
"We didn't hear or see anything that made sense," Liara stated plainly. "What was it you heard?"  
  
It was so clear in her head, but she was at a loss for words. The 'vision' was so brief. "I.... I can't really describe it, but.. I have the signal." Her voice was serene and it quieted with each word. "Now, how to open it..."  
  
No one else could understand? She realized that had Cerberus managed to secure the Prothean, they likely wouldn't have been able to awake him from the safety of his stasis pod. It was fulfilling: she was the only one who could resurrect him. The visions- _the nightmares_ \- from the beacons she had encountered, receiving the cipher... She had been in the making for this, and it finally _all made sense_. They had changed her for this moment.  
  
She took in a slow and deep nasal breath and hurried off to another building. It almost felt as though a force pulled her body, as she was seamlessly led to the final console. Liara and James followed behind her. She was visually brimming with anticipation.

 

 

It all seemed too quiet as they made their way into another lab. Cerberus had to be preparing something for them, and James ensured his gun was ready for it. Shepard took to another console, interfacing with it only briefly before she was taken away again. Liara and James turned their backs to her, taking point to guard the door. This new vision was more intense: there was more to see, and it elaborated on what was displayed to her before. It was the Prothean's last stand; but also an attempt to preserve what remained of their people. The vision followed one... A leader... She became completely focused to him and she couldn't quite place what was so special about him yet. He silently mourned the fallen- opening a stasis pod not unlike the one they had discovered. The code was revealed and her vision ceased without warning.  
  
She awoke to find herself leaning over the console. Slightly disoriented, the minor ringing in her ears cleared and she noticed gunfire.  
  
"Shepard, are you alright? We could use a hand here!" Liara yelled frantically before throwing out a singularity in the center of a Cerberus squad.  
  
"I have the code, we can open the pod!" Shepard answered, quickly taking cover next to Liara. She threw out her arm to ferociously release an incineration blast on the helplessly floating soldiers. With the group taken out, Shepard went onward to cover outside of the lab. Liara and James followed, cautiously checking around for more troops. A shuttle whizzed above them, heading towards the Prothean stasis pod. "Don't let them get the Prothean!" Shepard barked, chasing after it. She threw a drone out in front of her in case of any stragglers.

 

  
  
Their path was clear, but the shuttle was starting to release a larger squad of troops, and right above the stasis pod. Shepard sneaked behind cover nearby and clenched her teeth. She peaked out to assess and smirked. The group hadn't dispersed, but was looking at the pod as they talked among each other. Though she couldn't hear them well enough, it appeared as though they were hoping to move it. She wouldn't give them the chance to try it. She tossed a turret at the group as it hovered just above them and out of their reach. Those who attempted to run to cover were snap-frozen by a cyro blast Shepard sent out. The turret gunned down a few men before getting shot down itself. She quickly took out the remainder with her sniper rifle.  
  
Liara ran out from behind one of the buildings. "They are sending in a heavy mech along with three more shuttles! We need to get the Prothean out of here." Their team made haste to the pod. "Shepard, enter the code. It will take a moment to process. We have to hold this position and protect the pod at all costs."  
Shepard transmit the signal before looking up at the arriving shuttles. She calmly but swiftly searched for cover. Liara and James had already been set nearby. Shepard formulated a strategy, thought it was mildly crazy.  
  
"James, Liara.. Weaken the mech a bit- I'm going to hack it." Though she sounded confident, she could see the worry and doubt in her teammates' faces.  
"That's loco, but if you think it will work..." James shook his head a bit before focusing on the Atlas that dropped from the sky. The earth trembled beneath them. As it steadied, they opened fire on the mech, depleting its shields.  
  
Shepard lifted her omni-tool and focused in on it while giving orders. "Liara, singularity at your twelve! James, grenades at your eleven!" The two silently acknowledged by following through, and shortly after an electrical cackling could be heard. The Atlas turned slowly: firing mercilessly on its driver's fellow squad mates. Shepard sniped those troops who were making their way to cover. Liara threw powerful biotics into the mess of soldiers as James sprayed down those who remained with hungry bullets. Shortly after the last Cerberus troop fell to the ground, the Atlas caught fire and fizzed momentarily before completely exploding into a fiery ball.  
  
  
The stasis pod beeped from behind them as the chaos dissipated. Liara and Shepard quickly made their way to its side. Without bothering to question herself, she input the final code with ease. The foreign symbols on the control panel didn't seem at all alien to her. It slowly opened with an airy hiss. James slowly backed towards it, waving his gun side to side in search of any stray troops.  
  
"He will need time to fully regain consciousness." Liara was staring at him in utter fascination. There wasn't quite a smile on her lips but it was though she was trying to hold back exploding from excitement. Shepard's heart froze in her chest briefly when she finally saw him, seemingly sleeping peacefully. Time slowed around her as she waited anxiously. Finally, his four eyes slowly blinked open to look up at the two women awing over him. He furrowed his eyes as he let out a deep growl before finally shouting something unintelligible.  
  
  
  
It happened so quick, Shepard thought as she lay on the ground, attempting to scramble to her feet. The startled Prothean had jumped out of his pod and threw Liara and herself back with an incredibly powerful jade biotic blast. It felt like she lost a few seconds. Liara rolled onto her hands and knees also working to get herself back up. "Be careful, he's confused!" Shepard chased after him, though he was stumbling like a child and frantic like a wild animal. Once his footing settled in, he made his way to a nearby cliff. Shepard's stomach flew up into her throat as she bolted towards him, afraid he would tumble off the ledge. She realized once she approached him that he had stopped, looking out to the distance in disbelief. Unsure if he would act out again, she gently put a hand on his shoulder when she became engulfed in another vision. This one far more intense than the last few. It was as though she was right beside the Prothean leader as it happened. It was now clear that the leader she had been following in these visions was the Prothean in the pod. She was able to piece together that he was a commander as well. She watched him reluctantly get into his pod as the VI demanded he do; the world around them burning. She became overwhelmed with feelings that weren't hers. _A burning desire for vengeance. Disappointment in his people's failure- his failure. Self-doubt. Ultimately, fear of what was to come._ She would fall to her knees and cry if she could from the sudden flood of negative emotion. The world around her slowly melted into darkness as his voice burned in her mind- reverberated in her skull.  
  
  
As Eden Prime came back into focus, so did the Prothean who was now facing her and staring deep into her eyes. She felt a comfort in being near him- as though she has known him all her life. It was strange, but she welcomed it. Welcomed _him_.  
  
"How many others?" He asked. The question nearly seemed rhetorical due to his dejected tone.   
  
Her shoulders went lax as he spoke; comforted by his voice. It felt soothing to hear it physically with her own ears and not just through a vision. Like a dream coming to life, she thought. "Just you." The Prothean let out a rumble from his throat. "You can understand me?" She asked hesitantly.  
  
"Yes... Now that I have read your physiology, your nervous system... Enough to understand your language." He was hard to read, but Shepard thought she saw a pang of curiosity just before Liara and James meandered their way over. He glanced over to them only briefly.  
  
Fearing he was becoming distracted, she inquired: "So you were reading me while I was seeing..." She was rather intrigued with this unfamiliar adaptability.   
  
His gaze set back firmly upon her. "Our last moments... Our failure..." His words were sullen and she could feel a brush of emotion similar to what she had felt in her last vision.  
  
She let the feeling of defeat slide over her and she stood tall, hands behind her back, and attempted to appeal to his honor- his people's honor. "No. Your people did all they could- they never gave up, and I could use that kind of commitment now." She could see a hint of the fire returning to his eyes that was apparent in the visions. His eyes slowly made their way to inspect her comrades.  
  
"Humans. Asari. I am surrounded by primitives." He shook his head, lowering it slightly in disappointment.  
  
Liara just stared at him in utter fascination as she shrugged off his comment. Though she took a moment to look around, observing that they were safe from Cerberus from now but she noted to Shepard that they should leave before they return. Shepard nodded in agreement and ask that James hail Cortez immediately. She turned to the Prothean who was pacing, though not anxiously. "It's not safe here. Will you join us?"  
  
"You fight the reapers?" He asked plainly.  
  
"Yes," she replied equally.  
  
There was a brief pause before he spoke again in the same cold yet stern tone. "Then we will see."  
  
She outstretched hand to him with a warm smile worn on her freckled face. He made a halfhearted scowl at her before grumbling and walking away to where the Alliance shuttle had landed. Shepard slowly let her arm return to her side as her smile faded. She watched him board the shuttle before making her way to it herself.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the retrieval is a bit boring, I dread doing it every time in the game. Hopefully I've transformed it enough to be entertaining and pull you in! ;)


	2. The Avatar of Vengeance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liara and Shepard get to know the avatar of vengeance and a bit more about the Prothean people.

"Using my research, I’ve attempted to make the cargo hold more accommodating." Liara and Shepard stepped out of the elevator simultaneously. Liara continued speaking, though not before flashing an irritated glance at Shepard. "But now _they_ won't even let me go near him." She planted herself defiantly in front of the two armed guards posted at the cargo bay door. Her arms crossed and an eyebrow raised in a challenging fashion, but Shepard paid no mind. She just raised a hand at the guards and smiled to them.  
  
"At ease, men. We are going inside," Shepard stated.  
  
"You know protocol," one droned before letting his weapon drop to his side. "Just be careful, Commander. Who knows what he's capable of."  
  
As they moved out of the ladies' way, the guard who hadn’t spoke wrinkled his nose while glaring at Liara. Shepard thought she saw out of the corner of her eye Liara sticking her tongue out at him and grinned, holding back a chuckle. They exchanged one last look at each other before entering. Liara motioned her head shyly, implying Shepard should walk in first. She complied, and looked around the room upon entry. Only a few of the floor lights were on, revealing a light fog that weaved around them. Thin, dark fabric was strewn on the walls, also covering a majority of the side window that exposed the shuttle bay below them. It hardly recognizable as a room aboard the Normandy. She lastly observed the two large water basins on either side of the back of the room, with a monitor snug behind them. Her eyes lowered, finding their new guest kneeling on a mat, as though he was meditating. She approached him rather cautiously. His eyes slowly raised to her; his cold glare seamlessly penetrated her and chilled her bones. Despite this, she could feel her heart fluttering, tickling the back of her rib cage. Unsure of what to say, she stopped in front of him and waited. Though it took him no time at all to stand and grab onto her arms firmly. Her eyes shut themselves as a comforting, yet mysterious sensation filled her body. Liara could only stand awestruck and slightly frightened for what was happening. After a few moments, he took in a deep breath and opened his eyes while taking a single step back.  
  
"I sense fear in you. Anxiety and distress... The reapers are winning." He watched Shepard carefully, tilting his head a bit. It made her uncomfortable.  
  
"You.. sensed?" She bit the corner of her lip anxiously _. What else did he sense?  
  
_ "Yes. Experience is a biological marker: forever imprinted on your cells, your DNA. It is there for anyone to read." He observed her with a bit of a quizzical look on his face before turning away, propping himself on a basin. _He saw more than just 'anxiety' and 'distress'.  
_  
She balled and unfurled her fists quickly. In an attempt to regain control of the conversation she spoke in a demanding tone. "Then what was that back on Eden Prime? That was a hell of a flash back."  
  
He hung his head and spoke low into the basin he hovered over. "The battle left its own mark on me. I communicated this to you- It can go both ways."  
  
"Like your beacons," Liara chimed in, stepping out from behind Shepard.  
  
He turned away from the basin with a look of horror occupying his face. He hesitantly approached her. "Yes, which..." He grabbed her again, cautiously this time, as if he didn't want to see the answer he sought. Only seconds after his hold on Shepard, he released and stepped back, knocking into a basin behind him. The horror now twisted in to rage in his face. "You found one. You saw it all. Our destruction, our warnings. Why didn't you prepare for the Reapers? You did nothing, human!"  
  
Shepard face had grown pale, but she swallowed her fear and mimicked his rage. "My name is Commander Shepard and you will refer to me as such. I couldn't understand the beacons fully, they damn near killed me! No one could understand your warnings, and those who had the power to stop it denied the Reaper's existence until one was at their back door. We used what little the beacons provided me to stop an invasion three years ago."  
  
Taking some solace in this, he mellowed as his focus fell to the floor. "Communication is still primitive in this cycle." He sighed, lifting his gaze back to Shepard. "So the extinction was delayed?"  
  
"Yes," she replied proudly.   
  
"We found the blueprints for the Crucible. We were hoping you could help with this." Liara tapped away at the computer nestled between the water basins, bringing up the blueprints of the Crucible. She backed away slowly, watching him approach and observe the monitor.  
  
"The Crucible?" He slowly asked, clearly unaware of what she meant, even upon pondering the layout before him.  
  
Liara's heart had sunk, picking up on his confusion. It reflected in her tone as she replied: "The weapon your people were working on. I'd hoped you could tell us how to finish it."  
  
He quietly contemplated while scanning the screen. "We never finished it." He hung his head. "It was too late."  
  
Liara had mimicked his defeated look and crossed her arms, unsure of what to say. Shepard frowned and peeled her gaze away from Liara while taking a step towards the prothean. "So.. you don't know anything about the catalyst?"  
  
There was a few moments of silence before he responded, rage bubbling inside of him. "No. I was a soldier, not a scientist. Skilled only in the art of killing." He now gripped the sides of the console displaying the Crucible.  
  
Shepard looked over at Liara as she took a step forward, clearly confused. 'Why preserve a single Prothean soldier, and not something useful like a scientist', she had probably thought. "What _was_ your mission?" She asked, frustrated. Shepard watched the Prothean cautiously for his response.  
  
"My people had many avatars for single, exemplary traits. Bravery, strength, cunning." He lifted his head back up and spoke proudly.

Shepard smiled, content that he didn't lash out at Liara's question, or her condescending tone for that matter. "Which were you?" She asked, expecting one of the avatars he had already listed. _That would be useful.  
_  
His dark and angry tone returned, and Shepard's grin melted. "The embodiment of vengeance. I am the anger of a dead people, demanding blood be spilled for the blood we lost. Only when the last Reaper has been destroyed will my purpose be fulfilled." His released his tenseness and added a rather morbid comment: "I have no other reason to exist."  
  
Shepard looked back at Liara, who still had a bit of furrow to her brow. She wanted to offer words of comfort, but feared the outcome of doing so. How horrible it must be to feel your sole existence is to kill. She just quietly hoped to herself that he would stick around and see there can be more to his life- after they defeated the Reapers.  
  
Possibly sensing the awkwardness in the room, he turned around to face them. "Those who share my purpose become allies. Those who do not become casualties."  
  
Shepard didn't even have time to look over at Liara, who shared her same shocked expression, before responding. "That's a bit extreme. Nothing in our fight against the Reapers has been that cut-and-dried."  
  
He stepped toward her while speaking. "Because you still have hope that this war will end with your honor still intact." He came off as sad to her, experienced but broken. _If you don't have hope, what do you have?  
_  
"I do," she answered with a partial smile. Though it did not lighten his mood. It only seemed to cause him lash out more.  
  
"Stand in the ashes of a trillion dead souls, and ask the ghosts if honor matters." Sorrow still lingered in his voice.  
  
She just watched him blankly, unsure of how to react now. He threw his arms out beside him, looking around.  
  
"The silence is your answer," he stated plainly.  
  
Though she remained quiet, she kept her eyes locked with his. Her vivid jade eyes sparkled lively with the same hope that he had mocked her for having. His four golden orbs appeared to have softened for a moment, but they darted over to Liara's direction as she walked over to a table with a charcoal colored rectangular object that hovered in an azure glow. Concerned by the hardened look he now displayed, Shepard turned around to see what had caused him to appear so uncomfortable.  
  
"We found this at the dig site. I assume it belongs to you." Liara spoke quietly; visibly defeated. There wasn't much to the device. A solid blue stripe ran thru it with a slight curve. The edges were slightly rounded and it was only a few inches in length. Shepard looked back at the Prothean who had shut his eyes briefly. When they opened again, they were immediately focused on her. His cold, golden gaze made her shift uncomfortably.  
  
"It is a memory shard," he stated as he changed his focus to the object itself.  
  
"Could it help us with the Crucible?" Liara asked hopefully. Though the pain in his eyes answered her question before he could speak.  
  
"No," he answered, still fixated on the memory shard. He continued, words heavy with sorrow, possibly regret. "It contains only pain." His fists curled as a fire reignited in his eyes. He stepped confidently, stopping beside Shepard, who found herself back in his mesmerizing gaze. "But I will help you fight. And the last thing the Reapers die will be the last voice of the Protheans sending them to their grave."  
  
The fierce determination in his voice sent chills down Shepard's spine. How incredible it will be to fight alongside such an ancient and skilled warrior.  
  
Liara took the opportunity and bombarded him with questions, which became more garbled to Shepard as she watched Javik. He was un-amused to say the least. He finally stopped her abruptly with harsh words, "Does it matter? They are dead." Liara swallowed hard and took a step back while looking down at the floor.  
  
Shepard decided now to intervene and alleviate the tension before it rose. "What about before the war? How was it like? Liara has studied your people for the majority of her life, so anything you could provide us with maybe could help us with the device." He looked at her, skeptical. She reassured him with a smile, "You never know."  
  
  
As he dragged himself to answer a few of Liara's questions, she found herself examining him rather closely. He had such profound cheek bones that sat higher on his face than her own. They led her eyes naturally to those magnificent golden, orb-shaped eyes. Exhausting her attempts of reading any flicker of emotion in them, she next watched his mouth. Behind his thin, pursed lips, a flicker of paired fangs became exposed as he spoke. His bluish-grey skin seemed smoother than a Turrian, yet rougher than human or Asari with raised, yellow scarring. His body itself wasn't much larger a typical humans, though the armor he posted made it appear so. And he only had a couple inches on her, height-wise. His shoulders and hips were broader, though overall his figure was relatively similar to a human. Despite the odd number of fingers, toes, and eyes and the different shaped head, his form was rather welcome in her mind. Exotic, but not quite alien. She was enjoying just watching him speak and move, his voice humming in her mind. But when she heard silence, she shook her head and cleared her throat. The Prothean and Liara had been staring at her, but she was unsure as to how long.  
  
"Thank you for talking with us. I never imagined actually meeting a Prothean." She still felt mesmerized, which reflected in her tone.  
  
"This has been... amusing." He bowed his head at Liara first, and stared momentarily at Shepard before nodding to her.  
  
She bit her tongue and crossed her arms, feeling uncomfortable. _How long was I staring at him and daydreaming?_ "Oh?" was all she could manage to say, unsure of where he was headed.  
  
He sensed her discomfort, making sure to pause before sating her curiosity. His gaze continued to pierce her, until he finally replied. "To discover the most primitive races of my time now rule the galaxy." He looked to Liara briefly. "Together. In peace."  
  
Shepard mentally sighed to herself in relief, though as he looked back at her, she felt uneasy again. _Shit.  
_  
"Commander, you may count on me. I am known as Javik." He offered an awkward grin.  
  
Shepard stood at parade rest and smiled back. "Welcome aboard the Normandy, shipmate Javik." _Javik._ The way it rolled off of her tongue... His eyes, his skin, his form, his voice- it was all attractive... _Wait, what? I'm attracted to him_?She choked back a chuckle.  _No, no... Maybe the beacons, and the cipher.. or maybe even his touch earlier... had changed me. Does something inside of me think Protheans are attractive? Or that I'm Prothean?_ She wondered... if she felt like a Prothean, did HE see her as one? She searched his eyes frantically for some sort of answer. He was so hard to read, and it wasn't like she was going to ask. Javik seemed to have picked up on her scrambled mind and scanning eyes, and smirked while narrowing his eyes. A crippling chill swept over her entirety; her mouth seemingly frozen shut. She begged that he didn't have some unspoken ability to read minds.  
  
"I will need time for the stasis to wear off, yet. I cannot fight to my full capability yet." Thankfully, he didn't seem to acknowledge her contemplation and self-conflict. Shepard took this moment to just nod silently and turn away to retreat to her cabin. _I'm just too tired. I'll feel better after a few hours of rest; I'll be OVER this._ "I will let you know when the stasis has worn off completely and I am able to fight beside you, Commander." He added in his earthy, rumbling voice laced with rich accent, as if to mock her thoughts. Once the door whizzed shut behind her she bolted to the elevator, palming the console to take her to the safety and seclusion of her private quarters.

 


	3. The Break Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All is not perfect in paradise.  
> EDI joins the crew.

Shepard and Garrus exchanged a hearty handshake once boarded onto the Normandy. "Wouldn't fight the Reapers any other way, Garrus. Welcome aboard, once again."  
  
He patted her on the shoulder. "Now, I'm sure the Alliance reinstated Normandy could use some of my expert calibrations, so you'll know where to find me Shepard."  
  
She smiled and shook her head. "Alright, I'll swing on by later." He wasted no time getting in the elevator and heading to the main battery.

As Shepard had stowed her armor in the locker of the shuttle bay, the lights all dimmed and flickered. A low hum echoed in the shuttle bay. "What the hell?" she murmured to herself.  
  
Joker's voice rang through the room over the intercom, heavy with worry. "Commander, EDI just went offline. I can't access AI core diagnostics. You better get to deck three, fast."  
  
"Calm down, I'm going. I'll let you know what's up." She jogged to the elevator, imputing her floor destination request.  
  
"Alright, thanks Shepard."

 

-

 

The same men who had posted outside of Javik's room stood readied at the entrance of the AI core with fire extinguishers. She nodded at them and the man on the right opened the door. Smoke and foam poured out as the room slowly cleared, the provocative mechanical body of former Dr. Eva stepped forward. "EDI, what's going on?" Shepard waved the air around her face to get a better view.

The artificial woman spoke, with the easily recognizable voice of EDI. "I have taken control of Dr. Eva's body. It was not a seamless transition." EDI carefully inspected her new 'body'.  
  
"I can see that." Shepard chuckled and crossed her arms. EDI continued to explain the transition and her new abilities, finally requesting to take the body into combat with Shepard and the crew.  
  
Shepard nodded with a grin. "Good work, EDI. I think you should go check in with Joker, though."  
  
"Shepard, could you come by when you get a moment?" Liara's voice pinged on her omni-tool. Now alone in the AI core, she decided this was as good as time as any.

 

-

 

“It’s great to have Garrus aboard again.” Shepard said finally, attempting to break the awkward silence in Liara’s cabin. _Why did she even call me in here, anyway?_

“Yes. Feels a bit less lonely, now.” Liara added, her voice lacking sincerity or feeling at all. _Ugh. That's why.  
_  
Shepard let out a loud sigh and pushed away from the wall. “Really? You know, Garrus didn’t even hesitate to take his place back at my side fighting the real threat.” There was no holding back now. This needed to be over with, one way or another.  
  
“He had nothing left to lose,” Liara snapped back, referring to how his entire squad had been slaughtered conveniently before Shepard’s attempt to recruit him.  
  
“Yeah, and you just had _too_ much to lose.” Shepard received a glare from Liara that said ‘don’t you dare’. “Like revenge, secretly wanting to overthrow the shadow broker and, oh yeah... Feron,” Shepard hissed, continuing on without thought. Liara flinched. Seeing the sting on Liara’s face made her wish she could have withdrawn her comment.  
  
She attempted to turn the subject, though not to stray away entirely. “I never gave up on you! I recovered your body so you could be brought back to life. And Feron helped me do so.” Her entire body had gradually emitted a sparkling blue biotic glow around her, fists balled tight.  
  
“Well I was dead. You should have left me that way. Why did I get a second chance?” Shepard began to choke up a bit. She didn’t desire to have stayed dead- in fact she was eternally grateful to those who had gone immeasurable lengths to bring her back. Though she couldn’t help feeling guilty she cheated death.  
  
“Humanity needed you to stop the Collectors.” The aura surrounding her faded, as did her agitated tone. “We needed you to stop the Reapers.” Shepard rolled her eyes, thinking how she sounded just like the Illusive Man. Liara’s eyes wandered to the floor and her voice was soft, to the point it was just above a whisper. “And I couldn’t just leave you. I had to see you for myself, I still couldn't believe it and I was there. Your body deserved to be at least turned over to the Alliance- your family.” She blinked slowly before finally bringing her deep blue eyes to meet Shepard’s vibrant green ones. Shepard could see how sincere Liara was- making her taste regret at the back of her mouth for letting this argument escalate, let alone exist. They kept their gazes low and away from each other as they silently agreed to let one another simmer down.

After a few long minutes, Shepard sighed and mustered the courage to look at Liara. “I’m sorry.” Liara reluctantly gave into eye contact. She could see the sincerity in Shepard’s entire body. They both looked physically more relaxed and mentally unburdened. “Thank you- and Feron- for recovering me. I am glad to be alive today.”   
  
Liara gave a half-hearted acknowledgement smile as the room fell to silence again.  
  
“The real reason I asked you here Shepard...”  
  
Shepard made a step forward to stop Liara from continuing on. “I know. I agree.” Liara just looked at her, a bit shocked. “Look, I’ve gone through break ups before. I could see it coming.” She grinned a bit, in an attempt to lighten the mood- though the subject was bleak. Liara seemed to appreciate the gesture, at least, as she looked relieved. “I don’t have any regrets, but in all fairness, it was wrong to have even asked you to pursue a relationship with me.”  
  
Liara nodded and sat on her bed comfortably. She swayed her head gently to the side to motion Shepard to come settle next to her. She didn’t hesitate, a lot needed to be said and this was a long time coming. She was just glad it was all mutual. None of the fighting they endured was even necessary. “I think I just thought I was so attracted to you because of my interest in the Protheans. And that you were strong, courageous, and charismatic where I was not. I more or less idolized you. I should have just cherished you as a friend.” Liara had leaned back on the bed, stretching her arms out to prop herself up.  
  
Shepard chuckled lightly. “You are indeed a great friend, Liara.”  
  
She turned her head to reveal a large smile, accompanied by bright and happy eyes. “You are too, Shepard.” Her smile faded as she glanced over to one of her many terminals. “I don’t know what I was thinking anyway. Hoping to find love, or even just a stable relationship, during an all out-galactic war. The impending Armageddon.”  
  
Shepard frowned at her pessimism. She desperately searched for a way to lighten her mood again. “Come on, there has to be someone you have sights on." She paused, hesitant to suggest... "I’ve seen the way Feron looks at you,” she teased cautiously, anticipating backlash. Though to her surprise Liara looked back at her, holding back a grin.  
  
“No relationship for me while there is still one reaper standing, Shepard.” Liara had a twinkle in her eye as her smile twisted a bit. “Not you, not Feron, not even Joker,” she played along.  
  
Shepard couldn’t help but snort out laughter and Liara joined in.  
  
Finally as their laughing died down, Shepard tisked. “Darn. He will be terribly disappointed to hear.” Liara modestly put her hand up to her mouth in an attempt to contain the laughter, though it failed.  
  
After months (for Shepard, it seemed) of tension, for her to finally see Liara like this... It felt like the weight of the worlds had been relieved from her shoulders momentarily- as she sat and enjoyed some time with a great friend.

Shepard's Omni-tool pinged again, this time it was Specialist Traynor. "Commander, Javik has put in a request to speak with you."  
  
"Thank you, Traynor." She tapped at the device on her arm and looked over at Liara. "I should go see what he needs. We are en-route to our summit."  
  
Liara's expression mirrored Shepard's worried tone. "How do you think it will go?"  
  
Unsure if she meant meeting with Javik or the summit, she chuckled nervously. "I don't know, but I hope well. For the sake of the galaxy."  
  
Liara nodded and returned to her computers as Shepard made her way to the elevator.


	4. Vengeance Hungers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something suspicious...  
> Javik hungers for battle.

As Shepard waited for the elevator to take her to her destination floor, she spoke with Traynor over her personal comm.  
  
"I've found something while scanning Alliance channels, Commander: Grissom Acadamy is requesting help. A turian evac transport responded to their distress call, so normally we wouldn't need to do anything."  
  
Puzzled, Shepard asked, "but..?"  
  
"But something sounded off in the turian signal. I had EDI preform an analysis. It's fake. EDI thinks it's Cerberus. She said the faked turian signal was similar to the one that lured you to a Collector ship..?"  
  
Her heart jumped into her throat. "Cerberus..." she mumbled under her breath.  
  
Traynor continued, "In any event, whoever faked the signal wants us to think the Academy is being evacuated. But I believe they are still in danger."  
  
"Great work, Traynor." Shepard still felt rather worried as the elevator stopped, the doors hissing open.  
  
"If this really is Cerberus, hopefully this operation is worth investigating. It could be simple disinformation..." She trailed, clearly doubting herself and still nervous to preform in front of the Commander.  
  
"Traynor, good catch. I believe this is Cerberus." Shepard assured her as she stepped out into the hallway.  
  
"Thank you, Commander." The comm beeped off.  


-  


"Commander, does your ship malfunction often?" Javik's deep voice reverberated in the mostly empty room upon her entry.

Shepard rubbed the back of her head as she approached him. He hadn't known about their mission on Mars prior to finding him on Eden Prime and about the mechanical body of Dr. Eva, yet she hoped to keep her explanation minimal. "No, EDI was just having some difficulty accessing information in another AI's body."  
  
Javik turned to face her, leaning back against the water basin. "EDI?"  
  
Shepard blinked, a bit surprised EDI hadn't made contact with him yet. "Oh, EDI is our ship's AI. She-"  
  
"It." Javik interrupted, pushing away from the basin and approaching her. "AI's are dangerous. Why do you have one in your ship, Commander?" He was irritated, to say the least.  
  
He was right. Everyone who thought AI's were dangerous were right. Look at the Reapers, and the geth. But EDI was not. She had proven she is trustworthy. Shepard would never doubt her loyalty, and she rightly defended it. "EDI is loyal to the Normandy and its crew. _She_ always has been and always will be."  
  
A growl emitted from Javik's throat. Shepard no longer wanted to argue this point, as it would go no where. Had he been aboard last year, he would have witnessed first hand how faithful EDI was. She cleared her throat and put her hands behind her back, standing up tall. "You needed to see me about something?"  
  
The anger in his eyes dissipated, though he still seemed agitated. He walked slowly to the adjacent basin as he spoke. "Yes. You do not need to worry about the stasis effects on my body any longer, Commander. My hunger to fight the Reapers is great. I am ready to join you on the battlefield."  
  
Shepard grinned, containing her excitement to fight along side this seasoned warrior as best as she could. "Good. I was hoping to take you on just a small mission. I received some intel that Cerberus may have taken over a school for biotic and other gifted young adults."  
  
Javik stared at her, puzzled. "Cerberus?"  
  
It was odd- his lack of knowledge of the current events. It would get some taking used to. He knew so much about the Reapers during his cycle. How much had the Reapers changed since then? Or had they at all?  
  
"They are.. were.. a rouge organization that sought human race advancement. By any means possible..." She looked down at her feet, remembering all that Cerberus- the Illusive Man- had done for her, and how horrible it made her feel that they/he now hindered the galaxy's retaliation against the Reapers. She could feel how heavy with sorrow her own voice had become. "But they've become indoctrinated by the Reapers. They need to be put down. We can't let them get the upper hand by taking these kids." She raised her head to Javik's four, staring eyes. There was a long pause before he finally spoke.  
  
"If they are indoctrinated, we cannot afford to let them live." His voice comforted her, despite being quite aggressive. Maybe he knew more about Cerberus and her interaction with them than he let on, though it was unclear from his expression alone.  
  
She halfheartedly smiled before taking a step back. "I look forward to fighting along side you," she admitted. "We are en-route and should arrive shortly. Once you're ready, report to the shuttle bay."  
  
He bowed his head before Shepard turned to exit the room.

 

 


	5. Grissom Academy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cerberus takes over Grissom Academy.  
> Shepard tests Javik's combat abilities.

The shuttle subtlety coasted toward Grissom Academy below the racing Cerberus cruisers that now pursued the Normandy. This was confirmation of their fears- Cerberus wanted these kids, but Shepard wasn't going to allow it. She tapped on her omni-tool, ensuring everything was ready for combat that was sure to be awaiting them.  
  
"Alright, Commander. We're in." Cortez's voice came from the front of the shuttle as the doors opened.  
  
Shepard motioned for Garrus and Javik to scout forward. "Thanks, Cortez. We'll let you know when we are ready for evac." She drew her assault rifle and jumped out of the shuttle, the doors closing behind her. Garrus and Javik stood posted in front of the only accessible door. They looked at her and nodded simultaneously. As she approached, she could hear the garbled Cerberus chatter as well as incessant banging and grinding. She tapped on her omni-tool for a brief moment before a turret materialized before them, muzzle pointed at the closed door. She exchanged one last glance at her comrades before slamming her fist into the door to open it. Three Cerberus troops exclaimed something about "Who's there?" and "Incoming," but it was all interrupted by the spray of bullets the turret expelled. When the turret had ceased fire and no more chatter could be heard, Shepard peered around the door. A gruesome scene of blood splatter as well as armor and flesh chunks now strew the walls of this particular hallway. She kept her weapon drawn as she stepped into the gore-decorated room.  
  
"Kahlee? Kahlee Sanders?" Shepard called, though no louder than at normal speaking volume. The Intel Traynor provided her with stated that a Kahlee Sanders had sent the initial evac request.  
  
"Commander Shepard?" She could hear a woman speak at her three 'o'clock.  
  
"It's all clear, Kahlee." Shepard said, standing beside the partially ajar door. The edges were scraped and bent. She forced the broken doors open to be greeted by the muzzle of the instructor's weapon.  
  
Kahlee lowered the rifle immediately and smiled warmly, kind blue eyes flickering with relief. "Thank you, Commander. Admiral Anderson always said you were the best." She approached Shepard. "And with Cerberus coming for my students, I need the best." Shepard shook her hand heartily.  
  
"How many of you are there?" Shepard asked, following Kahlee to a nearby monitor and console. Javik and Garrus stood posted beside the door, ensuring no Cerberus troops strayed their way.  
  
"Fewer than twenty. Most were sent home when word of the Reaper invasion spared, but a few volunteered to stay. Some are prototyping tech for the Alliance. Others are biotics. They've been training for military operations- working together as biotic artillery.  
"  
_Kids fighting in this war? Well, I guess it's as much their war as it is ours. Still..._ "A few months of knocking over practice dummies can prepare your students for war." Shepard stated harshly. She was unsure if Kahlee knew how dangerous the Reapers truly are.  
  
"Agreed. But the Alliance could use any resource it can get. And our students are unique... resources." The hesitation in Kahlee's voice let Shepard know she was well aware of the danger. She retaliated a bit, anger increasing in her tone. "They wanted to help. How could we say 'no' with the entire galaxy falling apart?"  
  
Before Shepard could agree or reply in any way, the monitor beeped and flickered before them. The screen remained fuzzy, but a young man's panicked voice rang out. "This is Froeburg! There are students trapped in Orion Hall! Cerberus has us boxed in. They are coming in fast!"  
  
Kahlee smashed her fists into the console. "Damn it!"  
  
Sensing the importance of urgency, Shepard ran to the doorway, motioning Garrus and Javik to head out to the hall. "Orion Hall?"  
  
"Back out the door and down the hallway." Kahlee replied and began tapping at the recently-abused console. "I can get the door open."  
  
"I'll bring them back here and we'll make a run for the shuttle," Shepard called out as she swiftly made her way through the hallway.  
  
Immediately upon entering the doorway, a squad of three Cerberus walked behind a glass wall. One of the soldiers was dragging a flailing and crying man. Shepard looked to Garrus and then Javik, a fiery rage in her normally calm, jade eyes. She aimed her rifle at the innocent student's assailant and fired a three burst into his head. Before the men surrounding him even noticed, Javik and Garrus had done the same: instantly fatal shots through their helmets. Shepard launched an incineration bolt at the glass wall, shattering the remainder of it in a sparkling dazzle.  
  
"Get to Kahlee Sanders, in the command center." Shepard commanded, still enraged with what she just witnessed.  
  
"Th-thank you, ma'am..." he stammered, before stumbling over the wall and booking it down the hallway from which they came.

 

-

 

Almost every glass wall and window lay shattered on their way to Orion Hall. Piles of tables, chairs, and boxes piled in front of doorways in a blaze. A thin haze of smoke filled the air, though the many holes in the ceiling and walls allowed it to disperse through the entire facility and surrounding area. It looked like Cerberus was attempting to corral and confuse the kids. Shepard felt sick, suddenly remembering that during her brief from Traynor, it was stated that Project Ascension kids trained here. She wondered if David Archer had gotten out, or was safe somewhere inside the facility.

"Commander," someone ahead of her whispered to her. She must have lagged behind in quiet contemplation. Javik and Garrus were crouched beside a bench. "There are two troops attempting to collect a biotic student," Javik informed as quietly as he could. Shepard peeked around the bench to get a better view. The Cerberus soldiers faced a dark haired, young man who surrounded himself with an indigo barrier.  
  
She turned to face Javik and Garrus. "I don't want to take any chances. We don't know how strong that barrier is or how long it's been up. I'm going to freeze them and you two gun them down. Garrus, right. Javik, left."  
  
They nodded and readied their guns, pointing their muzzles out through the crevasses of the bench; Garrus his sniper, Javik his pulse rifle. Shepard tapped on her omni-tool, bringing up the option to launch a cyro-blast. She took a deep breath in and rose quickly from behind the bench, swinging her arm in the direction of the troops. A sparkling ball of white and azure flew from her fist, slamming into the back of the man on the left. He stumbled as his entire body froze, finally knocking into his comrade. The frost spread, incapacitating both of them. "Now!" Shepard barked, and two shots followed immediately. Their foes shattered in a wonderful display of shimmering ice shards. The young student collapsed, his barrier falling. Shepard ran to his side, as she could hear Cerberus chatter approaching.  
  
"There are more coming. I need you to play dead until it's safe and then make your way to Kahlee Sanders at security command." Shepard spoke to him quietly as she scanned the parameter.  
  
"Okay, but my sister Seanne is in here somewhere, too." The student lay flat against the ground now in a convincing state of death.  
  
"We'll find her and send her to you and Kahlee," Shepard promised before heading out, Garrus and Javik trailing accordingly.

 

-

 

As they continued, a man could be heard on the PA calling student's names, claiming their parent's were safe and at Sanctuary. Filling them with hollow hope that Cerberus would protect them from the Reaper invasion. Shepard wondered how many students handed themselves over to Cerberus on these false pretenses. She caught glimpse of a Cerberus centurion and motioned for Javik and Garrus to take cover behind separate overturned desks. Papers, some smoldering, littered the floor and crunched beneath the boots of the soldiers when they entered the room. There were several, and they discussed something that made Shepard's teeth grind.

"No headshots! Just enough to slow them down," one bickered while throwing his unarmed hand in the air.  
  
"Check the roster, we didn't need that one anyway. Was just some math geek," another barked back. They were approaching quickly in the cramped corridor. Shepard's gut churned. She gave the okay to open up on the heartless scum. Garrus put a round through one of the men in the middle's skull, causing the man behind him to stumble over him and fall flat on his face. Javik displayed his powerful, emerald-tinged biotics on one, turning him black as he screamed and writhed in pain. Shepard watched in awe before finally deciding to contribute some incinerates and assault fire.  
  
When the last Cerberus soldier had fallen, Shepard stood from behind cover watching the biotic aura around Javik fade. He noticed her wandering eyes and stared back briefly before turning away to continue out of the room. She had seen his biotics at work in the visions on Eden Prime, though this felt like a whole new experience. She was always fascinated by biotics. This in particular enamored her and left her grinning in excitement. She hustled on to catch up to her team, who had already rounded the corner.

A weak voice attempted to coerce them. "Stay back! Or I'll... I'll...." Their threatened was a female student, hunched over in pain. Shepard walked to her side. The girl had the same dark hair the biotic student they encountered had, as well as almond shaped hazel eyes.  
  
"She's injured. If you wish to assist her, do it quickly, though it could delay us," Javik assessed, before turning away to watch for Cerberus troops.  
  
"Seaane?" Shepard asked placidly. The girl looked up at her, nodding hesitantly. "We came across your brother. He is safe with Kahlee at security. Do you think you can get there by yourself?"  
  
She struggled, but pushed through the pain to stand up. "I... I think so... I just... I just need a minute..." She leaned up against the bench taking slow, deep breaths. Finally, she looked over to Shepard with a smile. "Thank you.  
"  
Shepard nodded before continuing on.

A laptop sat on top of a generator and it appeared to be hooked up to the PA system in this area. _Maybe that's where the broadcasts are coming from?_ Shepard overloaded it and the Cerberus man's voice could no longer be heard. Instead, Kahlee's voice echoed throughout the building; encouraging students to get to her at security and not to trust Cerberus. Help was here. The team entered Orion Hall, ready for anything Cerberus would surely attempt.

 

-

 

"Eat this!" A very familiar woman's voice rang throughout the Hall.  
  
"Jack??" Shepard called out in utter shock. _What is Jack doing here??_ Jack ceased fire as the last Cerberus attacker fell, though an indigo haze still lingered on her.  
  
"Shepard? Is that you?" Just as Jack and Shepard attempted to approach each other for a joyous and unexpected reunion, a Cerberus atlas shoved its way through a doorway beside them. Reinforcements poured out from behind it, firing wildly at the students, Jack, Shepard, and her team.  
  
"Everyone., get down! This thing's out of your league. Shepard, blow this thing to pieces!"  
  
The atlas deployed a smoke bomb instantly, though Shepard and Garrus fired at it through the smoke. The pinging of the bullet spray hitting the mechanical suit confirmed their aim was successful. Occasionally 'chink's would be heard as the glass overhead was hit. Javik threw helpless troopers through the air with mighty biotic force. They would flail wildly to no prevail before smashing into a wall or another floating comrade. The atlas fell with dissonant whirring and sputtering as Shepard gave it a final overload. Cerberus troops did not let up in the least, however. Twice as many as the initial assault came from every door around them.  
  
Shepard ran and took cover behind a building support, though it seemed Javik had the same idea. They knocked shoulders into each other, causing both of them to jump and point their rifles at one another. Shepard exhaled quickly in relief as he turned away and threw emerald biotics around the corner, knocking out multiple lackeys. She eyed him up one last time, still enthralled by his vivid, green aura before deploying a combat drone and posting a sentry turret a few feet ahead of them to protect their exposed side.  


The battle had ended, leaving mounds of Cerberus corpses scattered all around the Hall. A couple still gasped their last breaths. Garrus granted them mercy and put a final round through each of their skulls.  
  
Jack stood perched contentedly on the ledge of the second floor command room. She spread her arms out wide and spoke in her expected, facetious tone: "Kahlee said she was putting out an SOS. I had no idea the queen of the girl scouts would show up." Shepard chuckled and shook her head as Jack turned to speak to the students behind her.  
  
"Ah, Jack. Just as I remember her," Garrus chimed in.  
  
Shepard nodded. "I'm curious to find out what she is doing here."  
  
Jack jumped down to the ground level, cushioning the fall with her biotics. She stomped spitefully towards Shepard and proceeded to sock her across the face, making her visor cock to the side.  
  
"Damn it, Shepard! How many times did I tell you not to trust Cerberus?" She was enraged, but there was a bit of worry and hurt in her tone.  
  
Shepard spoke low, with hints of shame. "I know, Jack. You're not telling me anything I haven't told myself.."  
  
Jack crossed her arms. "Yeah, yeah I'm sure that's real comforting to all the people Cerberus has killed." Any hint of concern in her voice had dissipated. Garrus stepped beside Shepard, in hopes to diffuse the tense situation. "Well, well Garrus. Your face still looks like shit."  
  
"And you're still just as charming as I remember, Jack." Garrus played along.  
  
Javik still lingered behind, watching each of the doors as a precaution. "What the shit is that?" Jack uncrossed her arms and stared at Javik in disbelief. "Looks like a..."  
  
"A prothean. His name is Javik." Shepard said quickly before looking back at him, who now was watching them.  
  
"Mmmmh," Jack hummed. She pulled her curious eyes away from him and retreated to a serious demeanor. "Okay. Right now, all I care about is getting my guys out of here."  
  
"Your guys?" Shepard asked skeptically with a lifted brow.  
  
Jack chuckled, looking back at the students above them. They chatted quietly as they took this opportunity to relax. "Yeah... I guess so."  
  
Shepard smiled. "I'm sure you care for them a lot. I'm glad you've found someone to care about," she teased with a smirk.  
  
"Yeah, yeah. I guess your little girl scout team taught me a little something. Maybe your fairy princess attitude rubbed off on me a bit. And all those damn 'you can do it!' speeches..."  
  
Shepard laughed and tapped Jack's arm playfully. Her omni-tool pinged abruptly before Cortez's voice could be heard from it.  
  
"Cortez to extraction team. The Cerberus cruisers are coming back. They'll be back in two minutes, tops."  
  
Shepard looked at Jack who's new, friendly smile had faded. She hesitated before she responded to the shuttle pilot. "Get out of here and get back to the Normandy. We'll find another way off of the station."  
  
"Understood, Commander. Good luck."  
  
She wasted no time paging Kahlee to formulate a new evac plan. "Shepard to Sanders. The students are safe, but the shuttle's a no-go."  
  
Kahlee responded hastily, though without panic. "Okay, ummm... hold on. Could you get me station-wide camera access? I can find a couple of shuttles to use that aren't boxed in by Cerberus forces."  
  
"Alright, how do I go about that?" Shepard inquired, content an alternate plan surfaced quickly.  
  
"All you have to do is disable the Cerberus override in the command center of Orion Hall. Should be nearby where you currently are, Shepard."  
  
She looked skyward to where the students exchanged gossip. She made her way up the stairs and meandered around the exhausted young adults. A Cerberus laptop sat on the main console. She tapped away on the keypad to rid of the unwelcome override. "It's been disabled, Sanders . You should have access now."  
  
"Alright... " Kahlee paused, undoubtedly searching for a safe route to the shuttles they needed. "Okay, the fastest way is through the Atrium. Cerberus has sealed the doors, but you'll be able to open them once you disable the magnetic locks. They will be nearby in that control room. I'll get ahead of you and ready a pair of shuttles for our evac."  
  
Shepard scanned the area just out of arms reach, but didn't find it. As she backed away from the console, Javik called from behind her. "Commander, I believe this is the lock control."  
  
She kept her eyes locked on his as she walked to his side. It was still a bit surreal that he was even here. She was having a hard time peeling her eyes off of him, for some odd reason. Him mimicking her stare with his four, golden eyes didn't seem to help. She forced her gaze away and pressed a single button to release the lock. She found herself lost in his eyes once more before finally backing away to tell Jack they were ready to go.  
  
  
Garrus filled Jack in on some of the devastation the Reapers had caused, how Palaven had begun to fall just as Earth had. Shepard took this opportunity to ask Jack's opinion on teenage biotic students fighting against the Reapers.  
  
"Honestly, Jack... What do you think about these kids going to fight in the war?" She asked a bit cautiously.  
  
"Shit, Shepard... They are teenagers. Up until a few months ago, their biggest concern was getting laid. I've been training them hard, but I wouldn't throw them out on the front line. It'd be best they stuck to support roles. In the back ranks, putting up barriers and shit... I don't know. I can't tell them that, they need me to believe in them." Jack seemed just as nervous as Shepard did. She rubbed on her arm and looked down.  
  
"Do you think they are ready for this war?" Shepard came off more bluntly than she intended. Javik looked to Jack expectantly.  
  
Jack replied bleakly, "I don't think they have a choice." She looked up at the kids for a moment before returning her focus to Shepard, all fear and doubt wiped clean from her expression. "So are we going to get off of this station or what, Shepard?"  
  
Shepard motioned to the door that had been recently unlocked. "Yeah. Kahlee's going ahead to secure some shuttles. We will have to go through the Atrium." Jack nodded silently. "My team and I will go ahead to draw out enemy fire."  
  
"We'll shadow you from the second level. Take some shots at them from above and give you cover fire." Jack motioned for her students to huddle up nearby.  
  
"A useful tactic. They would avoid direct fire," Javik commented directly to the Commander. Hearing this comforted her a bit, though she still had some worry.  
   
"Just stay safe, Jack. See you at the shuttles." They exchanged a final nod before Shepard pried open the doors. She could hear Jack giving the kids a pep talk to motivate them as the two teams split up.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for being a bit 'cookie cutter' from the original mission. I just wanted everyone to get a feel for this particular Shepard's personality. There are a few missions I feel are important to include, so I hope I've made (and continue to make) it enjoyable to ready!  
> Also, this chapter turned out to be much longer than planned so I've broken it into two parts.


	6. Grissom Academy: Part Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Second half of Grissom Academy.  
> The evacuation.

High pitched ringing was all Shepard could hear as the world around her slowly came back into focus. A grenade had somehow made its way into a flourishing shrubbery that she had taken cover near. The beautiful flora had now, of course, been ripped to shreds and what was left of it was set aflame.  
  
"Commander!" A deep, rumbling voice could be heard above the ringing that had not subsided yet. Javik grabbed her beneath her arms and dragged her behind new cover, a bit of a corner between a bench and retaining wall. He dropped her a bit roughly and put his face right up to hers. He was quite livid. "Commander! Can you hear me??" She could feel a dopey smile curl on her lips, still disoriented from a too-close encounter with an explosive. This seemed to enrage him more, as he growled and slammed his gun against the bench and resumed return fire at their enemies.  
  
The sounds of explosions, gunfire, and biotic 'fwoohm's and 'wuubbuubb's drowned out the ringing just enough that she was able to pull herself up and lean up against the retaining wall. She brought up her omni-tool and threw out a pair of combat drones to thin Cerberus' numbers. Feeling steady enough she grabbed her rifle and alternated fire with well placed and timed cyro-blasts. Javik snuck a glance at her and shook his head with a sigh before throwing out some of his impressive biotic abilities.  
  


Cerberus was not the least bit amused that Commander Shepard had made an appearance at Grissom Academy. A mini-horde of soldiers had been deployed in an attempt to stop her and capture the remaining gifted students, who were being lead by Jack, the Subject Zero beast that Cerberus themselves had created. The grassy area with partial gardens of the Atrium may have been a beautiful sight for the teens to take a relaxing break from their hard studies prior to the attack, but by now a majority of the lush green land had been turned to smoldering ash. Clouds of smoke had rose and dispersed, shrouding everyone in a bit of a warm fog.  
From a recently deployed smoke cloud stomped out an atlas. Shepard looked around, finding Garrus posted at the top of a ramp. _He's got a clear shot of that atlas...  
  
_ She decided to contact him with a bit of a risky idea. "Garrus?"  
  
"Yes, Commander?" He replied instantly. His voice sounded muffled thanks to her ears taking a beating from a hostile's explosive.  
  
"Can you get a clear, clean shot on the driver of that atlas? Don't damage the mech at all, if possible," she asked, boldly.  
  
A bit concerned, he complied but not before asking: "What is it you are planning to do, Shepard?  
"  
She grinned wickedly; to which Javik observed, possibly equally concerned as he ceased fire. "I'm going to jump inside and tear these guys apart!" The adrenaline from battle combined with a close encounter with a grenade had her very willing to take a risk to get everyone of this station. She turned to Javik, feeling his curious gaze. "Can you put a barrier up around that thing while I'm inside? The front shield will be gone, I'll need all the help I can get."  
  
He hesitated, but nodded before returning to the fire-fight. "Understood, Commander."  
  
Just then, the machine hissed to a stop and slouched over. Garrus gave her the go ahead as she made her way as quickly as possible to the unmanned atlas.  
  
"Garrus, give Javik cover fire!" She punched the protective windshield out with a solid, fiery fist, enhanced from her omni-tool. Climbing into the cockpit, she got a quick feel for where all the controls were and what they did. When she finally looked out of the completely exposed front, she gulped. The signature green aura of Javik's biotics surrounded her and her new machine as he channeled a barrier.  
  
"Go, Commander!" He called out to her, now occupied with keeping an active shield around her and a massive robotic suit.  
  
She wasted no time and began firing missiles and massive rounds at the groups of Cerberus troops that swarmed the Atrium. Cerberus casualties rose significantly, now. An enemy combat engineer hid behind a turret he had deployed, throwing out fire from behind it. Shepard cackled and approached him, feeling incredibly superior. She lifted the atlas' fist and dropped it down hard on the turret and, inevitably, the engineer covering behind it. The turret fizzed out as it shattered into many pieces, un-deployed shells flying all around. The engineer's demise was significantly more bloody and gruesome. She scanned the Atrium in its entirety, gunning down the last of the troops who had attempted to flee.  
  
"It's all clear, Shepard!" Jack confirmed from above, safe on the second floor with her students as she had said previously. _These kids are so lucky to have someone care for them as well as Jack does, in a time like this._  
  
Javik dropped the barrier around the atlas and approached it to follow on to the shuttles. Garrus jumped down from the ramp and found himself beside the rest of his team. Shepard almost didn't want to leave the atlas, but it was almost time to bust out of this station. She disabled it from inside with an overload so, in case some lucky Cerberus lackey survived, it would not be readily useable again. With a sigh, she climbed out, pulling out her assault rifle. It seemed so puny now...  
  
Kahlee's worried voice came over Shepard's comm. "Commander, I've secured shuttles. There are more troops coming, please hurry!" She nodded to her companions and bolted to the door leading out of the atrium. The familiar voice of the Cerberus man luring the kids earlier echoed in the hallways: "Damnit! All forces retreat to the shuttle bay, now!" He was agitated now and Shepard could detect defeat in his voice. She smiled triumphantly, though now they would have to deal with whatever troops remained stopping them from boarding the shuttles and leaving Grissom Academy for good.

 

-

 

As the team ventured down the final hallway towards the shuttle bay where Kahlee patiently waited, a small group of students was spotted. Again, two Cerberus troops stood with their backs toward Shepard attempted to recruit them and lull them with a false sense of security. The one female teenager was not having it, and let them know with many snide remarks. Shepard had realized the kids were safely behind a thick, protective shield away from immediate danger. She remembered Kahlee mentioning there were a few technological geniuses who attended the school. 'OK'ing the attack, she nodded to her team and sent an incineration bolt down the hallway. The men burst into flames and danced around, frantically trying to put the fires out with no success. Javik and Garrus only let them suffer briefly before generously depositing a few rounds into their chests, allowing them to fall to the floor while still smoking. Shepard approached the young woman and men, her faithful team following just behind.

"I don't know who you are, but stay back!" The feisty teen called out.  
  
"I'm Commander Shepard with the Alliance. We're here to help." She stopped at the shield, seeing one of the kids crouched down tending to the shield pylon. He looked vaguely familiar... maybe... _David Archer?_ Though before she would have the opportunity to ask, the girl remained very skeptical with Shepard's claim.  
  
"I didn't buy it from the last guy, and I have no reason to buy it now." Her voice shook and her omni-tool was now raised, likely ready to fire at her should the shield fail.  
  
The young man crouched over the pylon spoke, though not removing his eyes or focus from the machine. "The square root of 906.01 is-"  
  
"30.1" Shepard answered with a smile. It _was_ David.  
  
David looked up from his study. "Hello, Commander Shepard." The teenage girl lowered her arm as her omni-tool faded, sheer surprise on her face: surprise from David knowing Shepard, the fact that Shepard really was there to help, or maybe that Shepard knowing the answer to David's mathematical inquiry.  
  
The significantly younger boy, who had remained silent until now, shared the same look of shock. "David, you know her??"  
  
David turned to him with a peaceful smile. "Yes. She rescued me from Cerberus. Sent me here." He looked back toward Shepard and stood up. "Made it quiet."  
  
"He looks better," Garrus commented as David disabled the shield.  
  
"I remember you. Normandy crew." He approached Garrus and lowered his head in shame. "Sorry." It broke Shepard's heart to hear him apologize for something he had no control over. Seeing this innocent man suspended in the Overlord machine still haunted her dreams occasionally. She couldn't imagine how it haunted his. With him standing next to her, she could see perfectly circular scars on his head. Surely there were more that were not currently visible.  A constant physical reminder of what he had endured.  
  
"It was never your fault," Shepard let him know, sincerely, while placing a hand on his shoulder.  
  
There was a moment of serene silence before he spoke again. "I've been counting."  
  
Shepard grinned, a bit riddled. "Anything in particular?"  
  
"The number of days you lengthened my life," he stated matter-of-factly: As though it was no big deal.  
  
She smiled, though this bittersweet moment would have to end. They still needed to evac the Cerberus-infested school. "Great job keeping yourselves safe. The biotic students are up on the second level and en route to the shuttle bay. Stay with them. They'll get you out of here."  
  
The girl's shock had faded for the most part. She rubbed the back of her head, ruffling her short, dark hair. "Uh, okay. Thanks."  
  
"Bye," David said before the students left to make their way up the stairs.

 

-

 

Shepard and the crew entered the doors marked 'docking', to find an empty and beaten down atlas. There wasn't any Cerberus to be seen. She looked to Garrus in disbelief before approaching the machine. She began to scan it with her omni-tool.

"Do you think it is functional, Commander?" Javik asked as he stepped beside her. He seemed aware of her intentions to pilot it, if so.  
  
She tapped at the red-orange opaque device occasionally while simultaneously reading its displays. "Well, it's a bit banged up but it will run." The omni-tool faded and she looked up into the cockpit. "If Cerberus tries to stop us from evacuating in a final ditch effort, I could provide everyone cover fire in this." She looked over at Javik, hopefully. "It would allow all the students to get off of this station safely."  
  
He sighed, possibly skeptical with the functionality of the machine. He inspected the unit himself, offering his observation. "The windshield is almost completely gone. You would be exposed to enemy fire." When he looked back at her, she was staring at him expectantly. He shook his head before she received the offer she had hoped for. "I can provide you with a barrier to compensate protection." She smiled to thank him but he walked away, towards the shuttle bay. Feeling safer, she climbed aboard and fired up the atlas, following behind him and Garrus.  
  


Upon entering, she could see the shuttles Kahlee had started up. She exited out of one and posted outside of it, rifle in hand.  
  
"Shepard!" Jack called from the second story as she ran into the room from the adjacent corridor. "Cerberus is all over us!" She threw forceful biotics from where she and the students came, alternating with barriers to counter the gunfire.  
  
"Go! Get to the shuttle, don't stop for anything! Kahlee's got them ready. I'll cover you!" When the top floor was clear of friendlies, she fired one of the atlas' missiles into the doorway. A few casualties were claimed, though a swarm of troops poured out through the smoke and bloodshed. They fired at her relentlessly- only to be stopped by Javik's perfectly timed barrier. He had run out next to her and kept the channel on the barrier up as he flung jade orbs of biotics at the foot soldiers. Shepard watched him in amazement for a brief moment before the pinging of bullets against the barrier surrounding her pulled her focus back. She fired back at the pursuing horde of Cerberus soldiers. Between shots, she would look over to see how many were still left to board the shuttle. The teens that waited took turns holding up barriers countering any stray fire that got through, but between Shepard and her team it rarely happened. They just kept coming, and the loading of the shuttle seemed to take forever.  
  
Finally, when she watched Jack hop onto the shuttle through the smoke, she ordered Garrus to get to them next. He complied, backing up to the doorway as he continued to fire assault rifle rounds into Cerberus Hench men. He stopped at the ajar doors of the remaining shuttle and crouched as he continued to fire, refusing to board until the rest of his team was there.  
  
Shepard attempted to walk the atlas backwards towards their salvation from Cerberus, but the machine made awful grinding and cackling noises as it refused to move. _Shit..._ Javik either heard the unsatisfying noises or saw the smoke that began pouring out of it, but he ceased fire. He put his weapon away on his back and lifted both of his arms as the barrier that surrounded the atlas expanded, allowing Shepard to jump out safely. She opened up her omni-tool as she ran to him, tapping away franticly to deploy a pair of turrets to assist them. Javik's emerald barrier shimmered around the two of them, his entire body sharing the same alluring glow. They exchanged nods and she posted the turrets before them, giving them a clear path to the shuttles. As they ran beside each other, Shepard offered Cerberus one last gift before their departure and overloaded the atlas. It exploded in an epic display of fire, smoke and electricity. The brutal explosion left many Cerberus casualties as well as a thick wall of dark gray smoke. A perfect diversion for the remaining team to evacuate unscathed.  
  
As Shepard and Javik could be seen, Garrus stood up with his rifle ready. Cerberus did not even make it to this side of the bay by the time Shepard and her team boarded and the shuttle doors folded shut.

 

-

 

"Joker, we flew out on Cerberus shuttles. Watch your fire," Shepard requested via the Cerberus shuttle comm.

"Right, I've got you on our sensors."  
  
Khalee Sanders approached Shepard with a peaceful smile on her face. She was visually more relaxed than when Shepard had first encountered her. "Thank you, Commander. We'd have never gotten off that station had you not come." Her sincere gratitude came out in a relieved sigh. "I can't believe we got them all out alive." She looked over to the biotic students hopefully. "I was going to suggest they stick to support roles." Her baby blue eyes returned to meet Shepard's. "But perhaps they're ready, after all."  
  
Shepard looked over to Jack, who had been joking with her students about getting them inked. She took a moment to look over at Shepard with a grateful smile before returning to her kids. "They are definitely ready..." Shepard looked back to Kahlee, who's eyes still sparkled hopefully. "But the Alliance needs them in a support role." Khalee appeared to be content with this safer alternative, while still giving the kids a chance to fight in a war that is equally their own. "We don't need another artillery unit. We need strong barriers for our front-line squads," she clarified.  
  
"If that's where you need them, Commander, that's where they'll go." She offered one last smile and a pat on the shoulder before she went to check in with the students herself.  
  
Shepard dismissed herself and sat beside Javik, who had been keeping to himself. "Great work back there, you've really impressed me." They locked eyes, but there was little to no expression on his face, certainly no gratefulness to the praise she had offered. "I'm glad you're on the team," she admitted before looking away with a smile. He looked at her for a few moments before returning his focus to the shuttle floor. The complements didn't seem to faze him; though maybe he had never had them before.

 


	7. Goals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Javik learns a bit about Jack.  
> Shepard remissness about her old squad-mate.

Shepard found Javik in the sub-deck of the ship: Jack's old quarters of her choosing. He was squatted down with a hand touching the cool floor. Shortly upon her entry, he stood up and maintained eye contact. "Commander, I was exploring your ship."  
  
"Find anything interesting?"She smiled. She took great pride in her ship and its crew.  
  
He motioned to points in the room. "This space has absorbed much anger. The biotic instructor from the Academy."  
  
Shepard crossed her arm and distributed her weight primarily to one of her legs. "Right, Jack... She stayed down here before she was teaching her students." She silently reflected on all of the little chats they had down here. Jack suggesting piracy of the Normandy, blowing things up, even calling Shepard a lesbian at one point because 'she cared about her too much'.  
  
"Traces of her pain are still present. I'm told she sought revenge against Cerberus when she was here." _Pragia._ He stepped closer to Shepard, as though to get away from the areas of concentrated anger. "A goal you helped fulfill." He leaned in closer and spoke low with a tinge of wickedness. "I hope you will do the same for me." A grin pulled onto his face.  
  
She smiled back, uncomfortably taking a step back. "Cerberus had taken Jack when she was just a child. They did sick experiments on her among other innocent kids. She had been conditioned to fight." Her blood grew cold, in disbelief of what had happened. "All of the children had been sacrificed and experimented on to turn Jack into the perfect biotic: an all powerful being." She stared off into the corner where she normally found Jack. "They succeeded, for the most part. But not without breaking her down in all aspects."  
  
  
No words were spoken for a good time. The Normandy hummed subtly, though no other sound was distinguishable. It was peaceful, to Shepard, at least.  
  


Javik chose to break the silence, providing some insight in how things were for him: "We had no time to teach our young anything but how to fight for the war. It seems as though she has prepared the students well."  
  
Shepard nodded silently in agreement. It was a great thing Jack had done and was continuing to do. When she first met Jack, she would have never thought she would accomplish something so great. Her face lit up as she remembered how Jack claimed some of Shepard's leadership and optimism brushed off on her.  
"At least I have better quarters," Javik commented.   
  
He didn't sound necessarily thankful, per-say. Rather, Shepard detected sarcasm. Shepard couldn't help but chuckle, shaking her head. He offered a half-smile before heading back upstairs and most likely back to his nicer quarters. Shepard lingered while reminiscing about Jack: all of the great times attempting to bond with her, and the many failed attempts she made to get to know her.  
  
  
Traynor's voice came over her comm. "Commander, we've entered the Pranas system a few moments ago. The salarian dalatrass and krogan clan chief are ready to come aboard."  
  
"Thanks Traynor. Direct them to the conference room, I'll be right there." She let out a drawn-out sigh and shook her entire body loose before heading back upstairs. _Well, this will be interesting._


	8. Sur'Kesh

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> En route to Sur'Kesh.  
> Shepard realizes this will not be just a simple pick up.

Shepard had asked Javik and James to meet her in the shuttle bay along with Wrex as they approached Sur'Kesh. The men readied themselves, ensuring their weapons were clean and assembled properly as well as picking out their favorite mods. They paid no mind to anyone else and not a word was spoken. Shepard dressed into her typical shiny, jade colored plate armor. While her suit was powerful and offered top-of-the-line protection, she also preferred it for its aesthetics. Its color complimented her own green eyes that sparkled with light blue flecks. She normally wore a visor, when a mask or helmet wasn't necessary to breathe. Not the greatest protective head gear, but it provided increased accuracy and useful information on everything from enemies to electronics.  
When everyone was all set, they boarded the shuttle and launched out of the Normandy.  
  


Shortly after boarding, Wrex inspected Javik. "Who's this guy?" he demanded aggressively.  
  
Shepard smiled sheepishly at Wrex. "Javik- he's a prothean." She turned her sights to him, seemingly admiring his presence.  
  
Wrex relaxed after seeing her soft expressions. "Well, as long as he can hold a gun, he's fine by me."  
  
Still focused on Javik, she added, "Oh, he can do more than just hold a gun..."  
  
Wrex laughed manically behind a smirk.  
  
Shepard looked back at Wrex quite mortified, in an attempt to recover from her day dreaming, she frantically corrected: "Errm, I mean he's got good biotics, you know. Like Liara good."  
  
Her nervousness didn't cause him to back off. He gave her a bit of a shifty look while keeping his somewhat evil grin. "I know what you and Liara used to do in your quarters, so I'm sure you have plenty of first-hand experience with 'biotics'."  
  
She attempted to glare at him and he caught onto her lack of amusement. He laughed once more and pat her shoulder. "The Normandy has always been a bit of a traveling freak show, hasn't it?"  
  
Shepard smiled and shook her head. She spoke louder, backing away from Wrex. "The salarians aren't used to seeing krogan on their home world. Let's keep this simple: land, get the females and leave before anyone changes their mind."  
  
Wrex growled and grabbed his shotgun. "I still don't trust a word they say."  
  
Grinning, she tapped his arm. "You should let diplomacy play out for once, Wrex. You'll get what you want."  
  
He still kept his defensive and skeptical demeanor. "These females are the best and probably last hope for my people."  
  
"We will slaughter the salarians if they get in our way." Javik chimed in.  
  
Wrex looked over to him in approval with a chuckle. He pointed and looked over to Shepard. "I like this guy already." Shepard just smiled and shook her head.  
  
"Commander, we've got a bit of a problem," Cortez called back from the cockpit. She turned quickly, hoping Wrex wouldn't notice and throw a fit. They hadn't even landed on Sur'Kesh yet. Cortez looked over to her, then back to the console before him that beeped angrily. "We're on the base, but we don't have clearance to land."  
  
Shepard kept her focus on the glaring, red blinks. "Inform them the dalatrass authorized this herself." She spoke quietly through her teeth, as though not to alert their hot-headed passenger.  
  
However; it was no use. Wrex let out a loud 'HMPH' followed by: "I knew they'd never keep their word! Let's seem the try to stop a krogan airdrop..." He smacked the shuttle door's latch and it hissed open.  
  
Shepard stumbled after him, "Wrex, wait!" It was too late. His monstrous feet had already planted on Sur'Kesh soil, his gun readied. Shepard jumped out next to him. His biotics had flared up and he was surrounded by its dark blue aura. Bright red dots had soon covered him as well as Shepard. Following the lights with their eyes led to salarian snipers posted on rooftops all around the base. Several salarian guards surrounded them, with either their guns pointed at them or their omni-tool, ready to deliver shocks. Wrex growled, his face wrinkled in disgust.

"Stand down! Hold your fire!" A gray salarian in jet black armor came running out, stopping just in front of his allies as they held their ground. "They are authorized to land. We only just found out about this transfer a few moments ago," he declared, frantically. It seemed sincere enough; his voice was ridden with sheer terror.  
  
"I'd like to avoid a diplomatic incident," Shepard said calmly with her hands raised slightly.  
  
"As would we," replied the salarian. The snipers no longer had Wrex and Shepard in their sights; however, the line of guards still aimed at them.  
  
"You have something valuable to Wrex." Shepard added, taking a step closer to him.  
  
"Something worth dying for," Wrex said courageously.  
  
"This matter can be resolved, but I must insist he remain under guard." The salarian's voice still shook with fear.  
  
Shepard paused, then turned to look at Wrex. She nodded to him. Hesitantly, he caved in.  
  
"Anything goes wrong and all bets are off, Shepard." Wrex gave the salarian one final glare before sheathing his gun and stepping off with a small pack of armed salarian guards.  
  
Shepard let out a long sigh of relief and stepped alongside the salarian who may have just saved Wrex's life.  
  
"I am Padok Wilks," he claimed. "I appreciate your understanding, Commander. With the war going on, our people are on edge."  
  
Shepard nodded in appreciation. "I think everyone is just a little."  
  
"This base contains sensitive information," Padok admitted.  
  
With the landing dispute having been dissipated, she remembered why they were there. She glared at him and asked in an agitated tone: "Does that include studying lost krogan?"  
  
"The females were in poor health when we found them on Tuchanka," he justified. "They were brought here to stabilize their condition."  
  
Shepard reflected on Wrex's brief in the conference room. These females were victim to Maelon's research. She witnessed the corpses, his barbaric methods, the filthy conditions of his workstation... She nodded in agreement. "I'd like to see them." She spoke quietly, a bit sullen. What these females had endured not just from Maelon's experiments, but the harsh effects of the genophage that had led them to agree to their exploitation...  
  
"Of course. I'll need to clear you for the lower levels. Give me a few moments, and meet me by the elevator." Padok turned and stopped at a fellow salarian who stood near the elevator.

 

-

 

The shuttle had landed, now that all appeared to be safe, and James and Javik found their place beside Shepard. She thought it would be best to check up on Wrex, ensuring he had simmered down. He still had two salarian guards next to him, though there weapons were kept close to there chest and were no longer pointed at him.  
  
"How ya doing, Wrex?" She asked, but his face confirmed he was still slightly enraged.  
  
"Shepard, I don't like this. I should be the one going in." He spoke a bit calmer than his expression reflected, to Shepard's surprise. His leadership had really changed him, and it was a great thing. It gave her hope for the krogan race.  
  
She smiled, and said partially jokingly, "how about you stay here and we fight one war at a time."  
  
He leaned back against the wall, and played along with Shepard. "Ah, that was just good old-fashion krogan hot air. If it'd been real, they'd be dead." He looked over to one of the guards half-expectantly. The guard just stared at his weapon, awkwardly pretending not to hear what Wrex just said. "I prefer my salarian liver raw," Wrex added, picking up on his uncomfortable clues. The guard looked at him, irritably, before staring at the ground; quietly contemplating if any krogan really ate salarian liver.  
  
"He is correct," Javik added, the salarian guards looking over to him in shock and terror. "It was a... delicacy in our cycle."  
  
Shepard held back a chuckle to the best of her ability. The guards' cold stare made her feel the need to divert to another subject. "You said there we reapers spotted on Tuchanka?"  
  
Wrex nodded. "Clans Jorgal and Ravanor spotted a few landing parties. The Reapers are up to something. Tuchanka may be a radioactive pile of rubble, but it's our pile, and we will fight to the last krogan to keep it that way."  
  
"And that is what it will take," Javik assured. His cold stare spoke reflected nothing but truth in his words.  
  
Wrex was old; hardened and weathered. He had endured so much, just as the krogan people did. He wouldn't let some machines annihilate what little they had left. He nodded at Javik. "We're krogan. We're ready."  
  
"You can never be ready for what is coming." Javik took a step towards Wrex. Wrex was confident in his readiness, but a bit taken aback by his comment. "I was born into this. There is no way to be completely prepared: Prepared to see your allies turned into enemies, to witness whole worlds crumble, even seeing the beasts you face that stretch to the sky, larger than an entire city."  
  
It fell silent for a while. Shepard didn't know what to say, but he was right. _How can you be prepared for this?_ She had started the fight before many, in this cycle anyway, and she still had no idea all the Reapers would be bringing to the fight. But with the crucible and the force of the galaxy, she was hopeful.  
  
Wrex finally spoke, leaning against the wall with one arm and looking off into the distance. "Ever since Sovereign showed, I figured this day would come. My people have spent too much time selling themselves out as mercenaries." He turned to face Javik and pushed up from the wall. "Now we can get back to what krogan do best- saving everyone from giant monsters." He took a step closer to Javik, a plotting grin on his face. "We are ready," he reassured, speaking slower this time with fire burning in his crimson eyes.  
  
Javik simply bowed his head and returned an equally suspicious grin. Their eyes locked as they shared a bit of 'I-can't-wait-to-kick-some-reaper-ass' moment of silence.  
  
Shepard grimaced and motioned her head towards the elevator. "I'm going to check in with Padok, see if the females are ready for retrieval." James and Javik followed her, leaving Wrex to continue harassing the salarians who were unfortunate enough to be stuck monitoring him.

 

-

 

  
"Ah, Commander," Padok said as Shepard approached. He had been tapping away at a PDA another salarian had handed him. "You have clearance to see the females, now."  
  
Shepard smiled and thanked him. He outstretched his arm towards the elevator and she headed towards it.  
  
"I differ from most of my colleges, Commander. I believe that curing the genophage will finally bring closure to this issue. We should have let the evolutionary process decide who lives and dies, not galactic politics. In the future, the krogan may yet play some role we can't even imagine." He spoke wholly from his beliefs; it wasn't just 'the world is ending, ass-kissing'. And she agreed completely. The genophage was wrong, even with such a violent and reckless species. The krogan could have wiped themselves out, or thrived to become as organized and tactical as the turians.  
  
They had reached the elevator, and the security device attached to it began scanning Shepard's body. "Now, just take this elevator down and-" Padok's voice was cut off by blaring alarms. 'Alert! Threat condition two has been declared. Scramble readiness teams,' the base's PA system boomed over the alarm repeatedly.  
  
"Whats happening?" Shepard asked frantically. She hadn't even stepped in the damned elevator! This was proving to be quite a difficult retrieval of just a few krogan women.  
  
Fighters took off into the bluffs while Padok tapped away frantically at his omni-tool. "Sensors have picked up activity on the perimeter." He deactivated the hologram on his arm and motioned for her to get inside of the elevator. "Hurry, Commander," he requested nervously. "Someone will meet you below."  
She wasted no time and rushed inside, James and Javik following behind with their guns readied. Padok sent the elevator down before sprinting beside his fellow salarians.  
  



	9. Sur'Kesh: Part Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Second half of the Sur'Kesh mission.  
> Shepard is reunited with an old friend.  
> Cerberus makes an appearance.

The elevator stopped at their destination floor and whirred open. The alarm system was still beeping away, the voice on the PA now requesting that all personnel remain on-site until further notice. It itched at the back of Shepard's skull, wondering what was going to delay them this time. _Couldn't just be a simple mission, huh?_  
  
Salarian workers rushed around Shepard, James, and Javik in the lab frantically. She wondered how they would even know who was supposed to meet with them in this cluster of salarians. Walking through the mess of busy men, they began clearing a bit of a path, revealing a familiar salarian in familiar white and black attire. "Shepard! Excellent timing. Good to have you here," he said with a smile stretched across his scarred face. He approached Shepard and her team.  
  
"Mordin!!" She called out in utter surprise. Her smile was ear-to-ear, reflecting that of a child that was given a handful of candy.  
  
"Eyesight functional. Surprise understandable. Hadn't expected to return to work." The two shook hands enthusiastically. "Good to see you, Shepard," he added as their hands released.  
  
"His speech is strange." Javik stepped forward with his comment.  
  
Mordin looked over Javik quickly. "Ah, a Prothean." His attention went back to Shepard. "Excellent."  
  
Javik was a bit impressed. He didn't expect that someone in this cycle (who wasn't told prior) would recognize what he was. And the Commander seemed comfortable enough with him, so he'd be alright. For now, he would over look his ridiculous speech and sentence structure.  
  
Mordin looked over his should before leaning towards Shepard, cupping his hand around his mouth and whispering: "Helped female krogan. Fed information to Clan Urdnot. Encouraged political pressure to free females."  
  
Shepard grinned slyly as Mordin stepped back. _Of course it was him._ "You were Wrex's inside source," she exclaimed quietly.  
  
He simply nodded and proceeded to wink. He tilted his head and motioned for Shepard and her crew to follow. "Females had weakened immune systems. Side effect of Maelon's cure." His quick steps ceased in front of a glass wall. There were several massive lumps underneath bronze colored sheets. Bodies... "These didn't survive." There was great pain and regret in his voice.  
  
Shepard frowned and placed her hand on his shoulder. "I know you did everything you could, Mordin."  
  
He sighed and turned away from the female krogan corpses to face Shepard. "Arrived too late. Cannot delay now." His sullen tone faded as he continued on excitedly, his eyes light with hope. "One survivor. Immune to genophage. Can synthesize cure from her tissue!" He rushed around Shepard and made his way along the protective glass. "Last hope for krogan. If she dies, genophage cure... problematic." He stopped before an indigo containment shield. Behind it was a fully restrained krogan, dressed in dark blue clothing trimmed with golden threads. Her face was mostly covered with a mask and cap, though behind it Shepard could make out a pale, wrinkled face and dull yellow eyes. "Please be careful," Mordin cautioned. "Krogan slow to trust."  
  
Shepard approached her slowly and spoke quietly. "I am Commander Shepard, Alliance Navy."  
  
"Are you here to kill me?" The krogan's voice was bitter, but laced with fear.  
  
Shepard spoke even softer, attempting to gain the female's trust. "Urdnot Wrex and I are here to take you home."  
  
She was not convinced, and continued to be suspicious of the Commander. "Why? What am I to you?"  
  
"You're the future of the krogan race. I'm fighting for that," Shepard assured. She had always believed the genophage was wrong, and her friendship with Wrex, Grunt, and other various krogan she had encountered had solidified it more so for her.  
  
The krogan's eyes lit up hopefully, but they faded as the siren blaring became louder and more rapid. Red lights flashed around the dark lab, and workers shouted to one another about the outbound comms being down. The PA voice echoed in the lab, now saying "Alert! Unidentified vessels have breached the perimeter."  
  
"Then I hope you brought an army, Commander..." The krogan remained calm and unmoving, though her restraints may have contributed to her lack of movement.  
Shepard looked around at the frazzled salarian scientists. "We have multiple ships inbound!," one shouted. Shepard's comm began pinging, and when she answered it Wrex's angered face popped up. "Shepard, it's Wrex. Cerberus troops are attacking the base," he claimed.  
  
"Cerberus.. What the hell," she mumbled. She was angry, to say the least, but confused too. What were they doing here? Do they want the female? What good does she do for them?  
  
"Get the females out of there now!" Wrex was unaware that all but one of the females had already perished before their arrival. Shepard was not enthusiastic to have to be the one to inform him...  
  
"Only one survived, Wrex... It might be safer down here," she suggested. Though Wrex grew even more infuriated.  
  
"What?? So the salarians can kill her like the others? Not a chance. If you still want this alliance, you get her out of there. Now," Wrex demanded before cutting off the comm.  
  
Shepard let out a sigh through puffed cheeks as she shifted in her armor uncomfortably. She walked up to a salarian at a console nearby the female's containment shield. "Release the krogan. We're leaving." She rarely barked orders to random soldiers, but she was terribly irritated. _Why does Cerberus insist on making everything so horribly difficult??_ Javik and James both remained quiet, somewhat stunned by her outburst.  
  
"I can't," the salarian stated, his voice shaking in terror. He didn't even look up from the console he was rapidly tapping away at. Shepard took her hand to her forehead, shaking her head with her eyes closed. "Protocol states during lock-down no specimen-" The salarian's voice cut out to a strained grunt, with a crackling noise and the familiar scent of electrical surging through flesh. Shepard opened her eyes and turned her head to focus on a salarian behind him who had assaulted him: Mordin.  
  
"Objection noted," he said boldly. Shepard had to contain her laughter, but not so much her smile. "Now, please release krogan," he requested kinder than Shepard's initial demand. The salarian said nothing and dared not move more than required to open the containment pod. Just a few key taps and the door beside the krogan's containment shield folded open. Mordin stepped quickly inside. "Need to monitor pod as it clears quarantine procedures." The door closed behind him and he faced Shepard. "Meet us at the next checkpoint, Shepard. Take elevator." He began to work at the console inside of the pod. "Likely Cerberus opposes genophage cure."  
  
He was likely right, but how did they know what they had intended to do? Was one krogan female really that devastating to their plans? Regardless, Shepard was still furious. She approached the female, hoping to reassure her before they lifted off to the next checkpoint.  
  
"You'll see Tuchanka again. I promise." The pod elevated with the silent krogan and busy Mordin inside.  
  
Shepard turned to Javik and James and nodded. "Let's go," she barked before taking off toward the elevator.

 

-

 

The elevator doors opened and Shepard went to rush in.  
  
"Look out, bomb!" James yelled, turning back to cover. Shepard already had forward momentum built, making her unable to stop in time, but Javik quickly reacted by hooking his arm around her waist to pull her back. His force combined with the explosion sent them to the ground. She slowly opened her eyes that were forced shut in terror as something unknown grabbed her. Javik was on top of her, though only partially as he was already getting up on his feet. Her shields were mostly depleted and she realized he had saved her. She was taken completely off guard, and just lay there for a moment trying to piece the event back together. Javik offered her a hand that she hesitated to take. Still a bit shaken up, she underestimated his strength and was pulled up against his chest. Slowly looking up, her eyes locked to his. The only word she would use to describe his current look would be 'serious'- though when didn’t he look serious. Certainly not amused.  
  
"Lola, we got a way outta here." James called back to her as he approached a doorway on the opposite side of the room. Shepard cleared her throat and stepped backwards, finally letting go of Javik's hand. She looked down at the ground and murmured "thank you", before quickly making off to James' location.  
  
Shepard looked around the base that now had smoke whirling around everywhere. The beautiful waterfalls and bluffs were masked behind thin, grey walls. Much of the visible flora was smoldering in red and orange blaze. Salarian researchers and STG troops lay scattered, either dead or incapacitated due to serious injuries. Wrex chimed in on Shepard's personal comm, disrupting her sullen observation. "Shepard, it's Wrex. I took the shuttle. Do whatever it takes to get the female to the landing pad!"  
  
"Don't worry. We'll see you up there, Wrex," she replied calmly.  
  
"I'll try to make life miserable for Cerberus in the meantime!" He laughed before cutting out.  
  
_Speaking of Cerberus..._ They had wasted no time swarming the facility, and Shepard's team encountered them immediately. They were made quick work of, with Javik's mighty biotics, Shepard's turret and incendiary bolts, as well as James' fire rounds from his shot gun. The team pushed through, stepping over the fallen enemies to the next corridor.  
  
As they made their way up a flight of stairs, Mordin called out from Shepard's comm. "Shepard, Cerberus troops at checkpoint. Attempting to kill krogan. Need assistance!"  
  
In an effort to calm down the worried doctor, she assured him they were almost to the checkpoint. In fact, once they turned the corner and a centurion's smoke had cleared, she could see the containment pod. The krogan remained unharmed, stationary in her restraints.  
  
"Bring them down!" Shepard ordered, sending a combat drone to block any troops getting too close to the pod. Javik threw a lift grenade, leaving Cerberus soldiers dangling helplessly in the air before he drained them of life with his biotics. Shepard and James gunned down the remainder, who refused to retreat despite their diminishing odds.  
  
With the last enemy fallen, Shepard looked over to the pod. Its precious cargo remained unscathed. She ran over to it just to make sure.  
  
"Are you okay?" Shepard asked, facing Mordin. He appeared focused, unaffected by the violent destruction surrounding them.  
  
"Containment shield holding. Will try to repair if necessary." He looked over to the female, now displaying concern. "Can't speak for krogan's health, however."  
  
"I'm fine, Commander," she assured confidently.  
  
Mordin expressed his concerns aloud. "Females kept secret. Possibly a mole in STG. Could be indoctrinated." He looked up from the console back to Shepard. Fear in his eyes, but collective in his body language. "If no krogan alliance with turians, Reapers left unchallenged."  
  
Shepard tapped at the console in front of the pod to clear them through the checkpoint. "We'll do more than challenge them," she assured with a growl.  
  
The containment pod began to elevate in its lift. "Shepard, meet us at next checkpoint. Cerberus is likely to target-" Mordin was rudely interrupted by a massive explosion behind them which had rattled the pod and knocked him over. The pod stood silent, refusing to lift any higher. The culprit crept from behind the pod: a Cerberus shuttle filled with troops. They immediately started firing at Shepard and her team, as well as the pod, though with not much success. Mordin scrambled to his feet, clinging to the walls of the pod. "Hurry! Next checkpoint!" he panted.  
  
Shepard returned fire at the men in the shuttle, but it whizzed off. An easily recognizable shuttle pursued it; a Normandy shuttle, being driven by no other than Wrex himself. The shuttle was being followed by a fighter; however they were moving to quickly to be recognized as STG or Cerberus. "Come on," Shepard called to her squad before running off towards the next checkpoint.  
  
The base was now littered with Cerberus shuttles, dropping foot soldiers all around. Undoubtedly, the highest concentration was being sent to where Shepard and the containment pod were. Persistent and annoying, but not much of a challenge for Shepard, Javik, and James. They were like a perfect three-man army against these cookie-cutter minions. Javik's jade biotics weaved across the makeshift, temporary battlefield, still occasionally surprising Shepard in both their appearance and strength.  
  
"Turret!" James called out, breaking Shepard free of her slight daze of fascination. Her omni-tool materialized and she tapped at it a couple of times before the turret fizzed and crackled, slowly turning towards its former allies and rapidly firing rounds into them. The soldiers wailed in pain and cursed in confusion. Their combat engineer attempted to approach the turret and was gunned down mercilessly in the process. Shepard and her squad picked off the remaining troops before heading to the next level of the base.

 

-

 

Screams of terror could be heard as they climbed the stairs. Turning the corner, Shepard could see where the cries were coming from. Varren ran rampant in this corridor, jumping on Cerberus troops and shredding at their faces with vicious, thick fangs. A couple assailants were successfully shot off by their allies, the survivors running off. One with red, shimmering scales stopped to look at Shepard. He whined before scampering off and out of the firefight.  
  
With the Cerberus presence significantly thinned on this level thanks to the animal prisoners of STG research, Shepard and her squad made quick work of clearing those who remained.  
  
The team continued up yet another flight of stairs only to find a jammed door, likely locked by STG protocol. "Alright, no problem," she muttered under her breath while putting her omni-tool up to the door lock itself. With the unsettling feeling of being watched, she slowly looked up and to her left while waiting for the bypass to go through. Javik had been staring at her, and made no effort to refrain from doing so upon her noticing. She wasn't sure why it made her feel so uncomfortable, but she found herself incredibly relieved when the door slid open.  
  
"Enemy still present. Pod under fire!" Mordin called out before Shepard could even step through the doorway. Forgetting all about the brief awkwardness she felt, she bolted into the room, throwing a combat drone into the battle while her omni-tool was still active.  
  
"Take them out! Get them away from the female!" Shepard barked while firing at the unsuspecting lackeys. One called out to the others 'It's Shepard! Kill her!'. Their focus now set on her and her armed allies.  
  
They took cover, but the cramped lab areas made it a bit difficult to maneuver. Shepard would occasionally bump into, or get bumped into by, Javik and James. James would just say "Lola," before stepping to the side out of her way. Javik would remain silent with nothing but that piercing, indescribable stare. Regardless of the less than satisfactory layout of the battlefield, they were able to grant their enemies swift deaths. Shepard stepped over the corpses and through pools of blood to get to the containment pod, where Mordin waited inside impatiently.  
  
"How are you holding up?" Shepard asked him while configuring with the console.  
  
"Containment shield strong," he stated, "but not designed for direct fire."  
  
Shepard nodded and looked to the krogan, hoping for a response.  
  
"This isn't your problem, Commander. You don't know me." Though the female was bitter, Shepard persisted with friendly and reassuring dialog. She made it personal, it seemed.  
  
"But I'd like to," she said sincerely with a smile while looking up from the console. "So, hang in there." She looked back to Mordin, who was watching the female with a concerned look. "How many more checkpoints?" she asked, hoping they could get the krogan out of here and to safety soon.  
  
"Just the landing area," he said as he turned his attention back to Shepard and then the console before him. "Hope Urdnot Wrex still waiting." He sounded uncertain, but Shepard, and apparently the female krogan, knew Wrex well enough to comfort him.  
  
"Wrex can't keep his hands off a fertile female." The krogan stated while letting out a bit of an airy chuckle. "He'll be there."  
  
Shepard grinned and chuckled along. "Sounds like Wrex, alright." She packed away from the console, sending the lift to its final destination. "I'll see you up top," she assured.  
  
As if on cue, Wrex chimed in on her personal comm. "Shepard, get your ass up here! I can't fly around all day!"  
  
She shook her head with a smile before making her way up to the final level. "The female's on the way up to the landing pad. Relax, Wrex, you know I'm not going to let anything happen."  
  
"You pull this off, and I'm making you an honorary krogan."  
  
His words seemed sincere but Shepard chuckled as she approached a ladder. "Oh, come on. I'm not one already? Grunt's Rite didn't count? Or our stand off on Virmire? Or curing the genophage?"  
  
Wrex gave a hearty laugh before cutting out and allowing Shepard to focus on the task at hand.

 

-

 

Upon reaching the top of the ladder, the pod was already under heavy fire. Cerberus swarmed the floor. "Hurry, Shepard. Containment shield failing!" Mordin shouted out. The bullets ricochet off of the blue force field, but now had started getting stuck inside of the shield itself, remaining stationary like floating in jello. Without hesitating, she ran into the room and launched a turret and combat drone, getting a majority of the troops' attention. She fired icy cyro-blasts at those she could, chilling them from the outside in. The frozen statues shattered under the fire of Jame's shotgun. Javik tossed a lift grenade into a cluster of men who still fired at the containment shield, leaving them floating helplessly only briefly before he shot them down. Cerberus centurions cloaked themselves in clouds of smoke, though their concealment was short-lived as Shepard's combat drone sought them out one by one. Her turret took out the final troop, who was jumping around engulfed in a green biotic glow that resembled flames.

  
"Need final approval now, Shepard," Mordin requested as she approached the containment shield for the final time. "You must authorize release. Pod then transfers to loading area."  
  
Shepard didn't want to give Cerberus a chance to attempt to interrupt them again, so she got to work right away at the console. She looked over to the female, who continued to remain still and silent. "Lets get you out of there," Shepard offered one last bit of comfort while the krogan was confined to the pod restraints. Before she could respond, the lift took the pod itself, leaving Mordin behind.  
  
"Shepard, heads up! You got incoming," Wrex warned on her personal comm. Mordin, Shepard, James and Javik looked upwards in awe as an atlas plummeted from the sky. Its landing vibrated the floor, likely resonating throughout the entire base. The atlas fired at Shepard and her crew, scattering them as they took cover. It did not persue them; however it stomped just beside the female before stopping. The man piloting the atlas cackled menacingly and hailed his men: "krogan has been acquired."  
  
Mordin kicked frantically at the door, though it was too badly damaged in the final assault to open by himself. "Door is damaged. Can't get out!" he called out.   
  
Shepard crept over to help him pry open the door. She grunted, pulling with all her might though it proved little difference. Until it seemed to open with near ease. She looked over as she tugged at the door and Javik had lent a hand. More accurately both hands and his wondrous upper body strength. Mordin had crawled out and took cover behind a long and large planter with Shepard and Javik.  
  
"Let's take this thing out," she said with a grin. Mordin popped out from cover and fired rounds from his pistol, alternating with various powers from his omni tool. Shepard overloaded the machine, causing it to malfunction though only for brief seconds before it would return fire at the planter. James rolled a grenade beneath its feet, actually causing a portion of the machine to catch fire.  The pilot panicked as the atlas beeped angrily and scrambled out of it, only to be slammed against a support beam by Javik's biotics.  
  
The team gathered up. "Great work," Shepard praised. "Now, let's get out of here." They made their way to the landing pad, where Wrex and the female krogan had already been waiting safely next to the shuttle.  



	10. Interesting Discovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard discovers something interesting about herself.

After a brief conference with Wrex, the turian primarch, and Mordin concerning the genophage cure, Shepard lingered behind in the silent room. She wanted to catch up with Mordin, talk with him about what has all happened since they parted ways while there was still a chance to. However, she knew he would be getting re-acquainted with the med bay and would be very busy working on the cure. She ultimately decided to hold off on their reunion, and instead check in on Javik. He had only accompanied a couple of missions, none of which actually were directly involving the reapers themselves. She was curious if this bothered him at all, or how he enjoyed being on her team otherwise.  
  
As she stepped in the elevator and chose her destination floor, butterflies fluttered in her stomach. She dismissed it as a combination of the leftover adrenaline from battle and the unfamiliar presence Javik continued to offer. While waiting for the elevator to reach the engineering floor, she played out a few different conversations in her head. The play outs would always end in a snide remark from Javik and awkward silence. Unfortunately for her, it felt all too real and unsettling nervousness sunk in as the doors before her opened up. She proceeded to Javik's quarters anyway.

 

-

 

Upon entry, she didn't feel right just rushing up to him as she did all the rest of her squad mates. So instead, she lingered a few feet from the door way, unable to even say anything. Javik, who had been leaning over one of the water basins, had not even turned his head before speaking. "Commander," he said, plainly.

She was a bit surprised he knew it was her. What gave it away? _I should have showered before coming down here, Sur'Kesh turned out to be pretty muggy..._ "Javik," she replied, with just as much excitement. She took a few steps, turning her head to the side and pointed down to take a sniff of herself. Thankfully, her fear of not noticing she had nasty body odor was just empty paranoia. Yet, it still left the question unanswered: _How did he know it was me?_ She stopped in the middle of the room and noticed the monitor between the two water basins. The screen was powered down, revealing a reflection of the doorway. _Oh...  
_  
With Shepard just standing in the middle of his quarters completely silent, Javik sighed and turned away from the basin he had been hovering over. He crossed his arms and rested the arch of his back against the basin, tilting his head a little. It remained silent with nothing but the Normandy's engine humming as Shepard still stared blankly at the screen, in awe with her foolishness. She could feel Javik's expectant stare and took a half step back while changing her focus to him. She meant to apologize but it never made it to her lips. In an attempt to collect herself she cleared her throat. "I wanted to talk with you about the missions I've been taking you on."  
  
He pushed away from the basin and approached her with a concerned look. "Are my combat skills not satisfactory, Commander?"  
  
Her eyes widened. "No! Absolutely! They are plenty satisfactory. Quite amazing, actually."  
  
His arms crossed and a look of pride swelled on his face. His lips curled and his eyes narrowed in on her, seemingly saying 'please, go on'.  
  
Sensing her own over-amusement with his skills, she cleared her throat again; successful in making things awkward once again. "What I meant was... Are you okay with accompanying me in tasks that do not involve reapers? I mean, Cerberus has been a real issue lately. They may be working with the reapers, so I need to deal with them." She rubbed her arm and looked to the space besides Javik. "But if you're unhappy-"  
  
"The end of a cycle always marks the beginning of chaos," he interrupted. "I am content to cull any destruction the Reapers bring in all forms. I enjoy killing any allies of the Reapers."  
  
Shepard looked back to him a bit surprised. "Well, it isn't confirmed they are actually working with the Reapers yet, its just suspected..."  
  
He held his palm to the air between them and lowered his head, signaling her to stop. He had provided the answer she sought and she needed not continue. She shifted her weight to one leg and looked at the ground. _Why do I  suddenly feel so uncomfortable?  
_  
It was quiet for a few moments while Shepard contemplated to herself, unsure of what was wrong with her. Javik was the one to break the silence, curious about this rogue organization. "This Cerberus... I do not understand why your own kind would oppose you. They will bleed the same as everyone else if the Reapers are not stopped."  
  
Shepard nodded and regained the courage to look him in the eyes. "So, you'll come with on any mission I need you on, then?" She hoped it wasn't too bold to ask... yet why would it even matter? She instantly regretted the question. _It's MY ship, why the hell did I ask that...  
_  
He simply nodded.  
  
She smiled and took a step backwards. "Okay. Thanks." She lingered for a moment before turning to leave. Javik stopped her before her foot was even in the doorway.  
  
**"Commander, why is it that you never speak to me in Prothean?"** His voice seemed different, but she couldn't place what it was. She turned slowly, only to find him a couple of steps away. _Was he following me out?  
_  
Unsure as to why he thought she could speak in a dead language, she hesitated. She gave it a bit of thought, though. She had received the cipher back on Feros years ago, allowing her to understand at least a part of the language. However, just thinking about the Prothean language, no physical words floated in her head. So how could she possibly speak it, anyway? **"Probably because I can't?"** She chuckled nervously, leaning backwards as she felt he was too close.  
  
Sensing she lacked comfort in this situation, he took those few steps forward until he entered her personal bubble. She searched his face and found an unsettling grin had formed. His top eyelids had covered a portion of his golden orbs, giving him a bit of a mocking look in tandem with the menacing smirk. **"Oh, but you can. In fact, you just did."**  
  
Her mouth opened in attempt to speak again, but her mind and face had completely froze. _That was just English- Human. What?_   "I-I should go," she managed to choke out before scurrying out the door. Upon reaching the elevator, which seemed miles away as she ran to it, she smacked the console to take her to the crew deck. She backed up with her eyes widened and jaw dropped. Her back hit the wall of the elevator and she proceeded to sink down. "What the fuck..." she mumbled, just staring at the floor.

 

-

 

Shepard stepped out of the elevator and turned the corner towards the med bay. Her entire body felt heavy and her legs wouldn't allow her to move as fast as she wanted. She had hoped her visit to the med bay would have been a heartfelt reunion, but this wasn't the case. She had many questions and she knew Mordin would be able to help her. As she approached the door, she could hear him mumbling to himself but not much else. She looked over her shoulder before stepping inside, her paranoia getting the best of her. She shuddered as she thought about how just moments ago, Javik had stealthily appeared behind her.

"Ah, Shepard. Was hoping you would stop by," Mordin welcomed Shepard as the doors opened. He hardly looked over from the vials in front of him that he had been tending to. He set the test tube he had been holding down. It was filled half way with a thick, crimson liquid. She let out an extensive sigh of relief upon seeing the room was only occupied by Mordin, the female krogan and herself.  
  
The krogan was perched on one of the examination tables in the far corner of the room. Her knees were tucked against her chest with her arms wrapped around them tightly. She looked over to Shepard and nodded to her. "Hello, Commander," she greeted quietly. Her tone had become very friendly compared to when she was in her temporary prison on Sur'Kesh, though who could blame her.  
  
Shepard smiled warmly to her. "Hey, hope you're finding it at least a bit comfortable here. The crew treating you alright?" She would certainly have a little chat with them, if not.  
  
The krogan chuckled and nodded again. "Of course, Commander. I was hoping to get a chance to talk to you, though not before you catch up with your old friend," she said while outstretching her arm towards Mordin. He had turned away from the vials and test tubes to face Shepard now, who had almost forgotten why she came here. The haunted look returned to her face as she slowly turned to the salarian.  
  
"Shepard. Feeling alright?" he asked.  
  
Shepard's emerald eyes bolted to the door to the med bay, which had remained shut since her entry, before looking back at Mordin. So many thoughts and concerns had flooded her mind, she didn't even know where to start. "I can speak Prothean," she whispered. _Maybe not the best place to start_ , she thought after the fact.  
  
Mordin rubbed his chin with a three-fingered hand. Javik has three fingers was the first thing that came to her mind. "Ah. Not surprising," he stated plainly. Shepard looked away from his hand and back into his eyes with awe and confusion. "Received a cipher on Feros years ago, correct? Purpose of the cipher to understand Prothean language, culture, history. To read their beacons. Makes sense you understand the language. What extent are you able to speak it?"  
  
Shepard shrugged. Frankly, she was terrified to learn just how much she knew. _How do you go years knowing something, only to not actually be aware you know it?_ She wondered what other secrets her mind held from her. After thorough chin scratching, Mordin let his hand fall to his side.  
  
"I just haven't felt right for the longest time. Like there has been a void inside of me," Shepard added. "I can't remember if I felt it before I died, but I don't think it's something Cerberus did- or didn't- do to me." Mordin solemnly listened, likely running different possibilities in his mind. "I feel like my mind is hiding things from me..." Her voice trailed off realizing she felt lost in her own mind. "Like, how did I not know I could speak Prothean?"  
  
Mordin nodded before offering some comfort. "Relax, Shepard. Will  run some tests. Have a few hypotheses. Will need you here for a few samples to work with." He smiled at her and motioned to the examination table beside the female krogan.  
  
Shepard exhaled in relief. Years of questions and mystery seemingly peeled away from her mind. She physically felt lighter. She took a single step away from Mordin to head towards the bed he pointed out to her, before stopping cold in her tracks with his next request.  
  
"Also need living prothean tissue for my tests."  
  
Once she regained control of her body, Shepard pivoted at an almost breakneck speed to turn back to Mordin. She stammered, looking for words to express her inability to ask Javik such a thing. "Mordin, I-I can't-"  
  
He put a hand on her shoulder and looked at her with a smirk. "Shepard. Doctor should take responsibility to retrieve samples. No worries." A look in his eye gave a confident impression that he had a plan. She mouthed a 'thank you' before walking to and climbing onto the medical examination table. "Maybe have Wrex pin him down to get tissue. Will see," he joked; though maybe that would actually be necessary. She hoped talking to the female krogan would get her mind off of everything.  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bold words are words being spoken in Prothean, italicized words are Shepard's thoughts (if you were unsure from previous chapters)
> 
> Hope you enjoyed getting to see a bit of my Shepard's quirky personality, finally! :)


	11. Aralakh Company

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wrex asks a favor of Shepard.  
> An old enemy resurfaces.

Shepard had promised Wrex that she would investigate a situation he had involving missing scouts. He believed the rachni were present on the planet Utukku, at least that's what he last heard from the scouts. He offered her his top team of krogan commandos to join in the war effort on Earth if she could handle the situation. Wrex had also sent said commandos to meet Shepard for the mission. They were called Aralakh Company.  
  
She decided to take James, who always loved fighting alongside the krogan, and Javik, who claimed prior to leaving the Normandy that his people had fought the rachni. She felt much calmer around Javik now, having complete confidence that Mordin would yield the answers she longed for. She thought it best to keep him around as often as possible to familiarize herself with him and to avoid suspicion after his lab test.  
  
  
"Reports of Rachni, huh?" James asked skeptically. The shuttle shook as it entered the atmosphere of the planet.  
  
"They were ferocious animals in my cycle," Javik informed them from the back of the shuttle. "We had used them as living weapons."  
  
"How?" Shepard asked, genuinely curious.  
  
"Biological proxies. They were able to inhabit harsh planets. Our scientist bred the most cunning and warlike queens. Then we unleashed them upon our enemies," Javik explained. As he continued, it took an even darker turn. "For a time, it worked- until they became too cunning and warlike and turned on us."  
  
"Damn..." James said while shaking his head.  
  
"We put them down before they develop any further," he added. "It was thought they were all exterminated." He looked over to Shepard with a menacing look. "Yet it seemed our experiment became this cycle's nemesis." No remorse or guilt was visible in his expression.  
  
Shepard frowned. He was right. Had the protheans not altered the rachni, or successfully wiped them out, the salarians may not have uplifted the krogan. The Krogan Rebellions may not have happened, and thus the genophage would never have been even uttered. It seemed the protheans had a far greater impact on life in this cycle than once thought.  
  
"We are here for krogan scouts," Shepard clarified. "If rachni are here, then the situation changes." She stepped before the door as the shuttle came to a stop. "Just be ready for anything," she warned. _Because why wouldn't this war offer anything short of that?_

 

Upon exiting the shuttle, Shepard made her way slowly toward a decent sized pack of heavily armored krogan. She always remained a bit hesitant around so many krogan, thanks to her many encounters of brutal and ruthless krogan mercenaries in the days of Sovereign's and Saren's terror. She was about to speak up to, what she expected to be, Aralakh Company before a familiar voice called out.

"Shepard? SHEPARD!!" A young and excited krogan burst through the small crowd.  
  
"Grunt?? Oh my god, what are you doing here?" Shepard threw her hands up into the air; surprised, but clearly thrilled. Grunt embraced his battle master in what was a bit like a hug but more of a crushing grab and lift. She could feel every bone in her body crack and the air force out of her lungs as they were squeezed in her chest cavity. "It's really great to see you," Shepard managed to choke out, constricted within his hold. He set her back down- well more like dropped her- with a glorious smirk on his face.  
  
"What are you doing here? I thought those idiots locked you up," Grunt mentioned before giving a playful punch on the shoulder. The human scum had punished his powerful commander, and had he been present when she was taken in he would have knocked some skulls in.  
  
"Relieved of duty," she corrected, while rubbing on the shoulder he had smashed his fist into. "Reinstated thanks to the reapers."  
  
"Yeah, they've got bigger problems now," he chuckled. "It's why I'm out here running Aralakh Company," he stated, proudly with a grin.  
  
"Aww, my little tank-baby is all grown up," Shepard cooed while being only mildly sarcastic.  
  
He dismissed her comment with a half-assed glare and turned to face the krogan who remained surprisingly calm while waiting to take orders. "They're tough, think they're invincible. Reckless, but effective." He turned to face Shepard once again with a look of approval. "When Wrex put Aralakh Company together, he needed a leader who represented the future of our species. Thanks to you helping me complete my Rite of Passage, I joined Clan Urdnot and learned what it meant to be krogan. And being the strongest, I was chosen to lead this honored company." The satisfied and proud glow he possessed warmed Shepard's heart. He had found something to fight for; meaning in his life. It was rewarding to see such a transformation in someone she cared greatly for.  
  
"You were a pain in the ass, Grunt. But if your krogan are half the soldier you are, I know we will make it out here." Her smile was wide and her jade eyes sparkled brightly.  
  
Grunt flashed a grin in return. "Glad you're here to help me bash in some skulls, Shepard." They shared a silent moment together, a bit of a calm before the storm. Javik used this opportunity to chime in.  
  
"Yes... You are the one." He approached Grunt and Shepard with a smirk. "The krogan who occupied my quarters on the Normandy. You left your mark," He sounded offended, and possessive for whatever reason. Javik had seemed more outspoken lately, and while Shepard was happy he was being less anti-social, she wasn't quite sure if this attitude was preferable to complete silence.  
  
Grunt narrowed his eyes and furrowed his plated brows. He spoke defensively; irritated with this odd-looking stranger's remark. "What? Who is this guy, Shepard!?"  
  
Shepard stepped in between them and placed her hands just in front of Grunt's chest in an attempt to diffuse the situation. "He's a friend, here to help. He's been fighting the reapers longer than any of us. Knows of the rachni, too," she added, while not desiring extensively explain the prothean and rachni encounters.  
  
Grunt growled and looked off into the distance. "The rachni!... A chance to face the old enemy? Impossible to resist." He looked to Shepard with an excited fire burning in his blue-grey eyes. Javik seemingly attempted to crush the young krogan's hopes. "You shouldn't be so eager to face the rachni. They were formidable opponents, even to my people." He spoke in his sullen tone that he usually had when he spoke of his lost race. Shepard couldn't help but feel a tinge of pain inside of her every time, wishing she could offer her condolences without getting attacked.  
  
"We don't know if the rachni had anything to do with this." She looked scornfully at Javik first, then to Grunt skeptically. "We're here to find the scouts."  
  
Grunt shifted uncomfortably and looked around at what remained of the camp. "Agreed. But this place smells wrong. Like a bad wound." He managed to remain still briefly and settle down. He was clearly eager to encounter this ancient enemy. "Our scans show the tunnels down there lead to a large central point. Hopefully it's a nest."  
  
Shepard squirmed beneath her armor. Nepmos instantly popped in her head, where she had assisted a few soldiers in dealing with a rachni infestation years prior. The mine she needed to clear out for them was the closest thing she had experienced to a rachni nest. She hated bugs, and rachni just looked like a giant cockroach-spider-prawn chimera that could spit acid and produced a sound that curdled her blood. The collectors reminded her of bugs a bit, but not nearly in the way she depicted the rachni. At least the collectors didn't skitter across the floor. She shuddered one last time before she purged the thoughts of the rachni infested mine from her mind temporarily.  
  
"Aralakh Company- move out!" Grunt barked. He nodded his head after the krogan while looking at Shepard. "Meet me at the scout camp up ahead," he requested before following his squad. Shepard nodded to her own team before continuing on to the camp.  
  
  
"Their base has been decimated. The krogan are overconfident. That is their weakness," Javik observed. There really wasn't much left. Just a few dinged up camp pods, stripped of nearly everything. It was becoming evident to Shepard that there would be little hope in finding the krogan scouts alive.  
  
A rogue breeze blew in, kicking up flecks of dirt that was left to swirl just above the ground. It was an unsettling and morbid silence here. The thought of giant, venom-spitting insects crawling around in the tunnels they needed to venture through provided enough creepiness. The barren camp and whistling wind was just fueling her paranoia even further.  
  
Grunt and a couple of krogan stood posted beside the dull silver pod closest to the tunnel. He looked inside the pod that resembled a rectangular tube. "There may be some supplies left behind. Intel. Who knows." He shrugged. "Feel free to look before we move out."  
  
  
Shepard decided it would be a good idea to check it out. _Maybe there will be something inside to confirm the rachni were here._ Her thick-soled boots clanged against the thin metal floor, echoing throughout the entire pod. Unfortunately, the makeshift room had very little inside. There were a few thermal clips, a single bag of dried rations and a few broken glasses that crunched beneath her feet as she made her way to the other end of the pod. The structure creaked and she realized a portion of it was dangling over the edge of the cliff.  
  
She leaned forward to look down the pit they hovered so delicately over. She gulped hard, regretting doing so. She backed away slowly, though not with much success as Javik had stood right behind her, looking down from over her shoulder.  
  
"A long way down," he pointed out.  
  
Shepard flashed him a glare before she motioned for her crew to head on out. There was bound to be a better path than straight down. However; after only a few cautious steps, crumbling rock could be heard and the entire structure rumbled before making its plummet to the ground below. Shepard slammed into the pod floor as it became completely vertical in a matter of a second. James slid a couple of feet before grabbing hold of a partial wall in the middle of the camp building. Shepard scratched at the metal floor as she struggled to find something to grab onto. Suddenly, something grabbed her arm and yanked her behind a counter.  
  
The three-fingered hand wrapped around her side and pulled her close. The fall happened relatively quickly, but it seemed as though time slowed down so she could catch a glimpse of her savior. Javik was crouched against the side of the counter, grasped on the edge with his left hand with his right hooked around her torso.  
  
The pod crashed into large boulders and became wedged just above the ground, tossing the three from their positions. They were all able to orientate themselves correctly in the brief fall to land on their feet, sending up a large cloud of dusty dirt and grit upon impact.  
  
"Shepard! Are you in one piece?" Grunt called out from the top of the cliff, sounding somewhat worrisome.  
  
"Yeah, I'm alright," she responded while brushing off the dirt and debris from her armor. She looked over at Javik who had been looking into the dark cave before them. He had saved her yet again. _Gonna start having to owe him, soon,_ she chuckled to herself.  
  
"Keep in radio contact!" she yelled up to him.  
  
She started towards the tunnel behind Javik and before James. The entrance seemingly glared menacingly at the newcomers. Shepard was convinced that if the rachni were watching and capable of doing so, they would be laughing at her before skittering off to sulk in the dark. She grabbed the rifle on her back and clung to it, keeping it pressed against her shoulder while she powered up the flashlight.

 

-

 

Upon entering the tunnel, they came across a krogan corpse, mauled and missing chunks of his armor and flesh. His hand was wrapped around a battered flamethrower. The weapon was coated in thick, crimson blood and some other mysterious gooey liquid. Shepard was able to pry it from his cold, stiff hand with a bit of physical persuasion.  
  
"Grunt, got a body of a scout down here," Shepard radioed to her krogan ally. "Looks like he's been dead for a few days..." She shook off as much of the slime and blood as she could.  
  
"Alright. We haven't come across anything yet. Take his weapon if he's got it, he won't need it anymore."  
  
Shepard inspected the Firestorm briefly before continuing on, though it was only a few steps until a web-like material which acted as a barricade blocked their way.  
  
"I-Is that webbing?" James asked, mostly to himself, while looking straight up at what appeared to be a spider web of massive proportions. He decided it was a good idea to poke at it, and it sprung back when he pulled his finger back. It didn't seem sticky like a normal spider web, just thick and spongy. "Looks like it might burn alright," he noted while he stepped backwards. Shepard tested the theory and surely enough, it caught fire rather quickly. The blaze lit the tunnel in a massive radius for the moment it burned away. The material singed and turned into a soft white and grey ash.  
  
Beyond the wall of webbing, it became substantially darker. It was suspiciously quiet inside of the winding caverns and she felt the need to break the silence to comfort herself, at least. "It's pretty dark in here. Anyone need to hold my hand?" She said sarcastically, chuckling a bit.  
  
"Might have to take you up on that offer, Lola." James called from behind.  
  
**"What purpose would that serve?"** Javik mumbled. Shepard refused to draw attention to his comment, as she was sure he just spoke in Prothean. Though, it continued to confuse her as to why she could hardly differentiate between his language and her own. Thankfully, James either did not hear it or acknowledge it.

 

-

 

As they navigated, they encountered a few more of the walls of spongy webbing. It soothed Shepard to ignite the disgusting bug-made walls into a bright, fiery blaze: one less horrifying, giant insect creation and a bit of brief light in the daunting caverns. Shepard could swear she heard skittering occasionally, but it was hard to distinguish real from her paranoia of bugs lurking in the dark. They would occasionally come across another corpse of a krogan scout- equally as mangled as the first they encountered- but no other life, dead or alive, seemed present.  
  
A cluster of large egg-like pods blocked their path. Shepard set a few of them aflame to see if they were destroyable. To everyone's surprise, they exploded a vile, red-orange goo in a close range radius. The spray was accompanied with a vicious and forceful 'POP!' when the shell burst open. As the slime hit the floor of the cave, it let out a wicked hiss and emitted a foul odor. Shepard felt it was safe to assume it was toxic.  
  
Javik appeared to have the same assumption. "Be careful. They are dangerous," He commented.  
  
"Those cords, Shepard. That's reaper tech...Right?" James stood just a bit off to the side of Shepard, his flashlight and shotgun pointed at thick, segmented tubes. Realizing she had recognized it,  visions of the collector base swarmed her mind.  
  
"Maybe," she replied cautiously. She just didn't want to believe it. _Are the reapers controlling the rachni?  
_  
The three continued on, now watching the ground for more of the tubes so not to trip over any. They became more abundant as the tunnel began to open up. Javik noted that they were approaching a large area. _Could this be the nest Grunt had hoped for?_ The open cave offered a significant amount of lighting, a nice change from the near-pitch black tunnels they came from. Some came from a fungus, which the cave's walls were freckled with, that glowed a beautiful light blue. Though the majority of the light shone down from holes up above on the cave ceiling: serene, warm sunlight.  
  
A small drop off of only a few yards was their only way into the open area. Shepard and her teammates jumped down, welcoming the light and vastness the opening provided. The peaceful moment was brief; as when Shepard looked to her left, massive metal plates that closely resembled reaper legs hung over a chasm, embedded in the cavern's walls. There was absolutely no doubt that the reapers had been here.  
  
  
A nasty beast crawled from between some stone columns. It had bright orange sacks around what would be its thorax, which were fully extended and jiggled with its every movement. Two long-barreled guns were mounted just below its vicious, fanged face, complete with perfectly round, lifeless, indigo eyes. It had three pairs of legs, sharpened like knives. They clicked against the rock floor as it moved. It looked over at the intruders and let out a ferocious, mechanical screech before jumping from the cliff it was perched on. Husks climbed out from behind boulders, growling before jumping out and attacking Shepard and her squad.  
  
"Whoa, is that rachni?" James exclaimed with both excitement and terror before shooting a hole into the chest of a husk.  
  
Javik and Shepard vocally confirmed while wrangling with the husks that swarmed around them. The reaper-enhanced rachni shot several rounds at them with such incredible force it chipped away large chunks of the rock they crouched behind. Shepard froze the last remaining husk mid-sprint before it slowly fell to the ground, shattering into jagged, icy bits. "Grunt, rachni presence confirmed," Shepard informed Grunt, her voice shivering. "Modified and _very_ dangerous."  
  
"Finally, something to kill!" he replied excitedly. While his enthusiasm was encouraging, Shepard still felt uncomfortable. The rachni were supposed to be extinct, at least most of the population needed to believe so. She knew the queen she had released years ago on Noveria could reproduce at an alarming rate; could the reapers have found another queen? Shepard frowned at the thought the queen she saved could have been recovered and re-purposed to serve the reapers. She funneled this upsetting theory into her fight against the modified rachni, sending an incineration bolt that crackled as it flew through the air. As it smashed into the center of the beast, one of its wriggling sacs busted open, spraying vile army green slime on the ground around it as well as itself. Small, mechanical rachni skittered from the goo towards Shepard. They resembled spiders or ants with an entirely metal body, three pincers on its face surrounding a singular eye-like device that had a light sapphire glow. Shepard and James attempted a few shots, but they would hop like fleas to evade. Javik threw them all back with a biotic blast, slamming them against the cave walls and stacks, which caused them to explode rather impressively considering their size.  
  
"Keep those things away from us: noted!" James examined in surprise before shooting at the vicious rachni who was hissing vengefully. It became engulfed in an emerald fog and screeched in pain, causing Shepard to clench her teeth at the horrid sound. She carefully aimed and fired several rounds into the circular occipital device on what would be its face. It collapsed to the ground, still smoldering until the light green flames faded. The beast slowly melted in its own acid, until there was nothing left of it but a puddle of viscous brown-green smoking goo.  
  
Shepard exhaled, relieved all of the bugs had been terminated. _For now, anyway._


	12. Aralakah Company: Part Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part two.

"The rachni dwell on toxic planets," Javik noted, catching up to Shepard's side. "These are different." Their eyes locked briefly before she jerked her head towards the sound of a small rock tumbling to the ground. Nothing was there by the time she had turned her gaze.  
  
"They must have been modified by the reapers," James suggested. Shepard nodded in agreement, subtly keeping her paranoia at bay. She scanned the area in front of them. Little more than darkness and rock. She peeked over at Javik in hopes for a less depressing sight. Thoughts of the rachni and reapers cleared way for her curiosity. She wondered about the Prothean language and how she understood it; how he knew. The fear for years of unknowing crept from the corners of her mind as thoughts of _'how?'_ and _'why?_ ' raced around.  
  
His pupils jolted to the corners of his eyes, as if he knew she was thinking about him. She bit her lip, eyes darted forward, and her posture straightened. She would return to the less-horrifying thoughts of the thing she knew best: the reapers. The crew continued on silently.

 

-

 

"The reapers are protecting an asset of great significance," Javik commented, standing in front of a solid metal wall. It was clearly reaper tech- so thick that when Shepard rapped her knuckles against it, it made hardly any sound at all. She let out a heavy sigh as she turned around. Clearly, they were blocked off. She looked around to see if there was another path. As quickly as she found another tunnel, Grunt and the rest of Aralakah company came into sight. Frustrated, she turned around.

"Well, that isn't webbing," Grunt mumbled while he kicked at the wall. He turned sharply to face Shepard. "That's reaper tech."  
  
She nodded with a bit of an irritated look. She just wanted to get out of here. It was odd, unsettling really, that they hadn't encountered many rachni.  
  
Before she could reach her hand over her should to scratch a phantom itch, James called out. "Hey Shepard, I think I got something." She wasted no time and rushed over to his location.  
  
Looking quizzically at the device he had discovered, she pulled out her omni-tool. "It looks like a power source of some kind." She let the program run its analysis and confirmed her theory. "If we destroy it, the wall should come down," she said enthusiastically, tapping at the hologram on her arm. She set it into overload mode and fried the power supply. Promptly, the wall sheathed itself with a teeth-clenching scraping noise. It revealed a large opening that divided into two sections. Two separate tunnels, two groups. Shepard and Grunt exchanged a nod and they both signaled their teams to move out.  
  
"See you on the other side," he chuckled.  


The floor was lined with thick tubing. They began encountering new pods. Instead of a red, burning slime, they exploded greenish-brown goo upon impact and several small, mechanical spider creatures poured out. Shepard was unsure whether or not to be thankful they were just tiny little skittering machines. She would sleep well if she need not see another one of the full-fledged modified rachni, she justified in her mind. James and Javik would stomp on the helpless immature bugs with a loud and squishy crunch. Their reminiscent goo clung to the bottom of James' boots and Javik's bare feet. Shepard preferred the strategy of keeping her distance and shooting a couple of rounds into them, allowing the sound of her rifle firing to mask the unpleasant squish.  
  
The cave walls were closing in on them and it wasn't just Shepard's paranoia playing tricks on her mind. The tunnel had actually began to taper significantly, hardly allowing the three to walk next to one another in a horizontal line.  
  
They approached another blockade of rachni-reaper webbed wall. It was burned before them by the flames of Shepard's gooed-up Firestorm, nothing but singed bits sinking to the cold cave floor. Everything around began to shake. "Look out!" Shepard called before shoving Javik forward to safety, taking the dive with him. James was able to do a forward roll in time beside the two. Large stones from the tunnel ceiling fell and tumbled restlessly all around, making a complete blockade from where they came.  
  
Javik grunted, pushing off of the ground with his arms. "Our exit has been blocked off." He brushed the dust and rock particles off of his beaten armor.  
  
"That sounded bad, Shepard. You alright?" Grunt asked somewhat worriedly over Shepard's comm.  
  
"Cave-in. We're alright," she groaned.  
  
"Good. Didn't want to dig you out."

"Aww, that hurts my feelings, Grunt!" She teased back with a chuckle.   
  
He responded with his signature slow laugh before the radio cut out to silence, leaving nothing but skitters and their own footsteps echoed in the tunnels. This new part of the tunnels had a few puddles of crystal clear and azure waters. As they ventured further, rushing water could be heard. They later discovered the culprit to the sound was short waterfalls, only a couple yards high. Javik was right- this planet was not the least bit toxic. The water was a refreshing scent to the musky cave as well as a peaceful sound. Shepard let out a light sigh of relief.

 

-

 

"The enemy is as relentless as they were in my cycle," Javik noted excitedly. He finally got to get in some reaper-pawn killing, and even some rachni- an enemy from his cycle that he had not encountered previously.  
  
The small team was surrounded by multitudes of reaper forces; modified rachni, batarians, turians, and of course, humans. Using the natural cover of the cavern for breaks between firing, they wore down their relentless attackers. James threw out a frag grenade into a mob of rushing husks. It exploded upon impacting the ground and sent shredded bits of them all throughout the air.   
  
"I think that's the last of them," James said with a deep exhale while putting his shotgun on his back.   
  
They all stood up from behind the rock wall and set their sights on another large sheet of metal blocking their path. The cave grumbled and shook as it slowly retreated into the ground. The screeching noise it emitted as it scrapped against the rock made Shepard clench her teeth.   
  
Behind the wall, a massive rachni towering well over them was revealed. It was shackled and surrounded by several krogan corpses suspended against the walls with sticky webs.   
  
"What the hell?" James exclaimed in surprise. Shepard put her hand to his shoulder before walking towards the giant, assuring him she would handle it. Its head cocked and slowly moved towards her, twitching from side to side.   
  
"Si...lence... The maddening sour note... has ceased..."  
  
Javik and James aimed their weapons at the shivering krogan who were encased in webbing. The strained speech was coming from what appeared to be corpses. They frantically searched for a target, though were never confident which one to take out or if it would even be a preferable idea. They finally decided to give up, rather investigate the corpses that now appeared alive and speaking.  
  
"What are you?" Shepard asked reluctantly.   
  
"The last queen," the voices echoed in unison.   
  
Shepard's heart sunk as her suspicions were confirmed. She hung her head and stared at the ground. "The reapers did this to you?" she sullenly asked.  
  
"Yes... The sour note of the machine is everywhere," the gravely voices responded.  
  
Shepard shut her eyes hard and paused for a moment before stepping closer to the queen. "I set you free on Noveria. You promised you wouldn't cause any trouble." She curled her fists. "The rachni were supposed to disappear," she exclaimed angrily.  
  
"We... remember. We kept our promise, retreated back through the relay. We started a new home. Beautiful children.... Harmony. But... The machines came." James turned his head sharply towards the queen with a sympathetic frown. Shepard shook her head slowly. The krogan's voices rose and continued on, now filled with rage. "They heard our song. Their shriek of sour notes drowned us out."  
  
"They can't hurt you anymore," Shepard assured softly.   
  
"Yes, we... understand," the voices replied calmly. The queen seemed to bow her head as if ashamed. "We hear the machines, but they cannot control us." She stretched her neck and pointed her beak to a power supply. "Remove this shackle and we are free."   
  
Javik and James stood on either side of Shepard. She looked over to James who had a softened look in his eyes. When she turned to Javik, it was the complete opposite. She was being stared down with a hardened glare. The death gaze was interrupted by screeches and the krogan's grumbles.   
  
"What!? The children return. Releases us!" they demanded.   
  
"Will you fight the reapers?" Shepard asked hastily.  
  
The krogan replied immediately. "We hate the machines. We will fight for our unborn children. Releases us," they inquired forcefully again.  
  
"She's a mess, the big girl needs too much time to escape," James observed frantically.  
  
"We're getting her out of here," Shepard said plainly while taking long strides toward the shackle's generator.  
  
"Commander..." Javik warned, like a scornful mother who's child had just brought home yet another stray animal.  
  
"That's an order," she barked, barely looking over her shoulder at him. While still approaching, she brought up her omni-tool and overloaded it. The queen's shackles dissipated and she moved her massive legs about freely. She roared in appreciation; her silvery-blue mouth flashing open briefly.

 

Grunt jumped down from a dark tunnel behind them. The glowing waters sprayed all about beneath his immense weight and force. "Come on, Shepard! They're coming!"   
  
Shepard bolted towards him; her team following behind closely. James spared one last look behind at the queen, who was attempting to making her way to safety.  
   
The four weaved between pillars of stone and thick walls. The frustrated, blood-curdling shrieks of reaper controlled rachni bounced around the cave. Grunt stopped abruptly before a curve in the path and outstretched his arm, which Shepard almost plowed into. They peaked around the corner to see several rachni waiting for them just a little ways down. Shepard looked to Grunt in horror, only multiplying as his expression hardened. He took a deep breath in and threw his arm out. "The shuttle's down that path. I'll hold them off."   
  
Shepard lowered her rifle as she approached him, shaking her head.  
  
"Get out of here, Shepard!" he insisted boldly. Shepard stared at Grunt in shock, fearing for his life. She knew he did too. He shared the look of many others she had said goodbye to: the look when they know they aren't going home. She couldn't even bring herself to say anything, her mouth slightly parted. Grunt waited for her to say something, but after a moment he realized he wouldn't want to hear it anyway. She would surely try to stop him, and there couldn't be any more time wasted. He shoved her, just enough to get her going and knock her out of her puffy-eyed daze. "Now go!" She slowly backed away, looking at him one last time before she turned and took off as fast as she could.

 

-

 

Once she caught up to Javik and James she lagged behind a bit, stuck in her conflicting mind. Part of her tried to grieve while another part denied he had been sacrificed in such a manner. Did she make the wrong choice saving the queen? Would that have spared his life? _No, he isn't dead.. He can't be..._

 

Javik and James hopped onto the shuttle and Shepard turned back hesitantly to look into the cavern one last time. To her utter surprise, a bloodied figure limped towards them. "Grunt!" Shepard shouted out, wasting not a single second before running to his aid.  
  
"Anyone.... got something to eat?..." Grunt mumbled before falling onto Shepard. She struggled to embrace him and help keep him upright. Javik and James exchanged a glance before getting off of the shuttle to assist her. She took no notice to the rachni blood, as well as Grunt's own, that had been smeared all over her armor. She was just happy he was going to be okay. James grabbed onto Grunt's other arm. Javik stood at Shepard's side but she lifted a hand to imply she was fine. He still followed beside her closely.  
  
"We'll get you something to eat, Grunt," she soothed. "Fishdog foodshack?"  
  
He coughed out a quiet chuckle.

 


	13. Some Downtime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard is able to unwind and relax between missions.  
> That is, until an unexpected visitor makes an appearance in her quarters.

Finally, a chance for a decent shower! The sickening smell of blood and guts had become overwhelming now, having seeped through her armor and onto her skin.   
  
Shepard blared her music on her cabin's sound system. She needed her own, custom mix that she could sing along to: music she could only listen to on occasion because this Earth music 'didn't translate well for other species' and 'wasn't cool anymore'. She loved it, and as soon as it was set up, she stripped down and jumped in the extremely hot shower. It was always set just hot enough to barely stand and that's, in her opinion, the only way to properly enjoy the pure luxury of a shower. The lights were slightly dimmed in her cabin as well as the bathroom. It provided her soothing comfort. She deeply lathered her fiery red hair, as well as her filthy and scarred body, in a fruity-smelling wash. From the second she stepped into the shower, she had been singing- loudly. The music was already as loud as the stereo would permit, but she made sure she could hear herself and really belted out. At least her singing was better than her dancing. _Well, probably_ , she thought.

  
  
When she was felt it was time to cease bathing, she shut off the water and stepped out onto the rug guarding the shower door. She sighed as she realized she didn't bring spare clothes into the bathroom with her. Yes, her cabin was private, but she hated leaving the beautiful sauna-like environment she created with her near-scalding shower- especially while unclothed. The ship itself she found was always a bit cooler than she was comfortable with. She wrapped a dark towel around herself after a quickly drying off with it. Reluctantly, she went to leave the comfort of her steam room, and- Javik was standing in front of her fish tank, seemingly inspecting the peacefully swimming exotic fish.  
  
"THE FUCK?!?" She glared at the intruder; fire burning in her eyes and a scowl on her mouth, bearing her teeth slightly. Her arms crossed tightly across her chest, though it was covered well by the over-sized towel. She quickly sidled to her desk to shut down the blaring music.  
  
He turned to face her and uncrossed his arms. He tilted his head a little, but other than that, it didn't seem he even care she was fresh out of the shower.. and nude. Well, under the towel, anyway. But Shepard was frantic, waiting for him to explain himself. "What are you doing in here?" she snarled.   
  
"You walk into my quarters whenever you please. Rarely do I ever get warning," he retorted. "In my cycle, there was no need for such.. privacy. Your 'EDI'-machine had to explain to me the primitive use of separate restrooms." He crossed his arms again, un-amused as he remembered the 'concept' previously explained to him by their ship's AI when he attempted to enter the 'incorrect' bathroom.   
  
Shepard let her guard down once she realized it truly didn't matter to him as much as it did her. In a sense, he was right. This guy fought beside her nearly every day, why should it matter if he saw how she was under her armor? Still... She sighed, keeping her arms crossed but loosening their grip against her breasts.  
   
"Did you need something, then?" It seemed he was up in her cabin long enough to forget about what he originally came to talk with her about, because after a moment his eyes furrowed and he actually seemed mad at her.  
  
"Commander, why did you spare the rachni, _again_?" He spoke sternly and as their eyes locked, she could confirm his rage.  
  
"I couldn't wipe them out when I first had the chance, how could I leave the queen after she fell victim to the Reapers again?" She could tell that answering with a question like such wasn't sufficient. She went on to elaborate. "I encountered an asari who was helping the queen rebuild a while back. She delivered a message to me, and it seemed as though this wasn't the first time they were taken advantage of by the Reapers. She deserves vengeance for her people just as much as you do." She sighed and shifted her weight to one leg. "As much as _any_ of us do." It seemed he started to understand now. He had learned of her first encounter on Noveria from overhearing shipmate's chatter, but not her private conversation on Illium. "I believe in second chances... Or as many as it takes to redeem oneself; atone." She grinned a bit after a brief pause. "Maybe it will bite me in the ass after this war is over, but I trust she will do whatever it takes to bring the Reapers down, which is all that matters right now. All species' survival depends on winning this war."  
  
Javik uncrossed his arms, and nodded in approval. He seemed relaxed now, at ease with her justification. It was silent for a while before he finally replied.  
  
"They were powerful weapons and formidable opponents in my cycle. They will be so against the Reapers, as well." He went to leave, but stopped in the door way and turned to her. "Interesting choice in 'music', Commander... But that fragrance you wear..." He briefly shut his eyes as he inhaled slowly, a look of satisfaction in the golden orbs as they slowly re-opened. **"It pairs well with the pheromones you have been displaying as of late."**  Before he walked off, he eyed her up one last time; with _that_ look again... Smug; like he knew something she didn't. Oh, how she hated that look.  
  
  
She smiled and shook her head. She was too happy to drown in worries, now. _Time to get dressed and call it a night._  



	14. Curing the Genophage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A mission to cure the very controversial genophage gets complicated quickly.

"Vengeance is the goal...Suicide is not!" Javik cried out, his voice tangled in worry.  
  
Since they’ve arrived on this wasteland planet; a ship crashed just a few meters from their convoy, they’ve detoured through ancient underground ruins completely engulfed in darkness, they’ve been swarmed by countless reaper forces, and they had been chased by a massive and incredibly territorial thresher maw. It had been quite an eventful day for everyone involved.  
  
"Come on, we've done crazier things." Shepard reloaded her weapon with fresh thermal clips. Adrenaline flowed through her. "When someone says you can't, it’s all the more reason you should," she added with a grin. 

They were going to follow Wrex’s and Eve’s mildly-insane plan: pit Tuchanka’s native thresher maw 'Kalros' against the reaper destroyer inconveniently stationed in front of the shroud. It only required sneaking by the reaper, basically in plain sight, and immense faith in the ‘Mother of all Thresher Maws’.

Shepard began to walk forward as she observed the path before them. A few pillars of stone laid in ruin that could be utilized as cover. A clever idea popped in her mind which visually represented itself on her face in the form of widened eyes and a smirk. She would send Javik and Garrus to drop the hammer on the left as she took the path to the right. They could summon Kalros quicker if they did it simultaneously.  
  
Before she could even turn her head to share her plan, a bright, crimson light caught her attention. The reaper had spotted them despite their cautious movements and brief time in the shrine. “Get down!” she hollered. They scrambled to the nearest cover just in time as the reaper’s merciless laser beam shot above them.  
  
“We’ve got company!” Garrus informed. Massive orbs of flaming debris plummeted from the sky. They crashed into the stone floor of the building, sending rock shards and sheets of dust every which way. It became nearly impossible to see for Shepard as she peaked out from behind the safety of cover. By the time she heard the mechanical growling of the brute, it was already right in front of her. It smashed its claw into the pillar and shattered it like glass. Shepard jumped back hastily and fell onto her back. She gripped her arm and rolled away as the brute advanced. Once she maintained a safe distance, she pushed herself up against a wall with her legs as she tapped frantically at her omni-tool. A droid materialized between Shepard and the brute and immediately began spitting flames into the brute’s face. It had no choice but to step back while it roared in agony.  
  
Shepard took the opportunity while the beast was distracted to get up on her feet and bolt towards the right hammer. She was able to glance back and catch glimpse of Javik and Garrus taking down another brute. Not letting up in her sprint, she instructed her teammates over their com link to head to the opposite hammer. “Do not hesitate; activate it immediately,” she commanded with the hammer now in close range. By the time the men verbally acknowledged her order, she had reached her destination.

Shepard began to investigate the mechanism before her when a scraping sound caused her stomach to twist nervously. She turned sharply to find the brute, who appeared to be rather ticked, sporting licks of drone flame attempting to peruse her. It was a mere few meters away, but was moving rather sluggishly. She gripped the rifle from her back and swiftly, yet precisely, aimed for the shot. It bellowed tauntingly; its bone-shaking roar caused her to grit her teeth. She fired before it could get any closer. The round penetrated its ‘eye’ and it collapsed shortly after. She ensured her proximity was clear and returned to the hammer.  
  
Shepard watched the device rise slowly before falling with immense force. The vibration it sent through the ground shook her very bones. It reminded her of when she assisted Grunt pass his Rite. She smiled while reminiscing, though only briefly. Before the shivering land could recover, another great shake rattled it. “Alright, they did it!” she triumphantly exclaimed to herself, looking towards the opposite hammer. However, the victory was short lived, as the reaper destroyer she had nearly forgotten about fired its beam at the device. It was virtually obliterated in the process. Shepard immediately began running to the location, not even bothering to ask over their com line of her team’s status. She feared the worse as the smoke cleared and she could not spot them. Thankfully, Javik and Garrus rounded a pile of ruined temple structure into her sights. She skidded to a stop and slapped her hands onto her knees while she caught her breath.  
  
“That damned thing has been shooting at us the whole time!” Garrus proclaimed in frustration. The destroyer focused in on their new location with its ominous crimson firing focal point. As if sensing their impending doom, or the destruction of the shrine, the ground trembled viscously. A behemoth thresher maw busted through the earth, shrieking as it crashed into the reaper fangs first. Thresher maw acid, stone, dust, and metal bits flew all about. The reaper attempted to retaliate by firing its incineration laser, but the thresher maw, presumably Kalros, twisted and contorted its serpentine body to avoid it. For such a large beast, she moved quickly. Her body became intertwined in the mechanical atrocity. She tightened her hold on it and crushed it with ease, crumpling like an empty aluminum can. Taking her deceased trophy with her, she receded into the dehydrated land. The three stood in utter awe, having witnessed the demise of a reaper via thresher maw.  
  
The dust and debris from the brief battle had settled. Eve, Wrex, and Mordin had now joined Shepard, Javik, and Garrus. It seemed no one had any words for the incredible event. Given the circumstances, it simply came down to a mother protecting the den. With the world ending, everyone should be assisting in some way to prevent their homes, and lives, being violated. However, for the moment, they could all bask in the glory of this great victory.  
  
It was even more so short lived for Shepard as she realized the shroud appeared to be damaged. “Everyone, get back to the shuttle,” she requested rather blandly. “I’ll stay with Mordin to make sure he can administer the cure safely.”  
  
“Excellent,” Mordin expressed while heading to the shroud. “Could possibly use help to counteract the sabotage. Glad the Dalatrass informed you of it.”  
  
Shepard smiled and walked alongside him.

 

-

 

Upon reaching the towering shroud, it was clearly more devastated by the battle between Kalros and the reaper than Shepard originally anticipated. Smoke poured from miniscule windows, indicating fire. Mordin had been tapping frantically on the computer at the shroud’s feet while she continued to stare.

She noticed the beeps from the computer had stopped and was replaced with quickened footsteps. Mordin had begun to approach the smoldering tower itself.  
  
“You’re going up there?” she asked, rather confused.  
  
“Yes. Manual action required. Have to counteract STG sabotage. Ensure cure disperse properly.” Mordin hardly even looked up at her from his omni-tool. An explosion set off in the shroud, sending bits of flaming wall and metal down upon them. He didn’t even flinch.  
  
"You can't go up there! This whole thing is coming apart. You won’t have time to..." Her face was flush and her body drenched in a cold sweat. She could feel her eyes beginning to swell. She wanted to tell him they could find another way to administer the cure in time, but deep down she knew there would be no talking him out of this.  
  
He turned to face the shroud again, observing the looming death trap. “Remote bypass impossible. STG countermeasures in place. No time to adjust cure for temperature bearings.” He paused before turning to face her. “No. No other option. Not coming back. Suggest you get clear. Explosion likely to be... problematic.” There was a brief hesitation before he quickly turned and quick stepped to the crumbling tower.  
  
Shepard regained a bit of strength and pursued him. “Mordin, no,” she whined, choking back tears.  
   
He didn’t stop until he was inside of the shroud’s elevator. He firmly planted himself and faced her. “Shepard, please. My project, my work, my cure, my responsibility.” He smiled haphazardly. “Pleasure working with you, Shepard,” he assured. There was no fear in his eyes. He put his hand out to shake hers.   
  
Hesitantly, she grabbed his hand. "Had to be-" His words were cut off as she pulled close and wrapped her arms tight around him. She had to do something to hide her overwhelming emotion from her brave and dearest friend. He embraced her as well, rubbing his hand on her back some.  
  
"Someone else might have gotten it wrong," she managed to whisper, unable to contain her tears.  
  
They held for a moment longer before he said "Have to go now, Shepard. Need to cure the genophage."  
  
She slowly backed away, head drooping. "Goodbye Mordin. I'll be seeing you soon..." She wasted no time turning away and sprinting off before he could see her wreck of a face. She thought if she’d run fast enough, it could save him.  
  
  
_Somehow._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope I got you guys in the feels! I cry every time I have to say goodbye to Mordin. :( Not a lot of Shep/Javik interaction here, but it's setting up for the next chapter. Stay tuned, folks!


	15. Shaped by War

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part one  
> Shepard mourns. Javik enlightens her on evolution and his own cycle.

Javik dipped his hands into the left-most water table, looking down at them solemnly while he carefully rubbed them together. He slowly lifted his head to look at the monitor hanging above and between the tables. His four golden eyes scanned the screen for something, but his scowled face remained unchanged. He tilted his head and turned to face the room’s only door; swearing he heard footsteps mixed in with the loud, stagnant hum of the ship. Water dripped from his fingertips onto the cold floor with a barely audible ‘ping’.  
  
After a few moments of expectant waiting, he realized no one was approaching. He closed his eyes and sighed bitterly. His pointed fingers curled into fists as he reopened his eyes. To get the rest of the water off of his hands, he swiftly extended his fingers and jerked his hands to the side. The slight but forceful movement flung the water from his rough hands to the ground. He headed for the door, which slid open when he was in its proximity.  
  
Rather than spend more hours for a message or routine visit, Javik decided he would just go to her.

 

-

 

Javik didn’t spare a moment to buzz or knock or obtain any sort of permission from the commander. Upon entering Shepard’s room, he didn’t immediately find her. He took a few more steps in and spotted her curled up on the couch. She sported a black and red sweat pants and shirt; the shirt’s hood pulled over her tangled ruby hair. The coffee table was littered with empty glass bottles. There was a single cup with just a bit of amber colored liquid in it. Shepard did not move, and Javik wasn’t entirely sure she was even awake. 

"I wanted to thank you Commander," Javik said rather loudly. He planted himself firmly in front of the gorgeous fish tank.  
  
Shepard’s movement remained minimal. She ran her index fingers beneath her eyes in an attempt to relieve the puffiness from crying earlier. No one had really seen her since they returned to the Normandy from Tuchanka. She retreated to her quarters and kept to herself, doing little more than mourning and drinking. "For..?" she asked softly, her face still buried in her knees.  
  
“I have seen the death of a reaper,” Javik answered much quieter this time. “It has been a long time.”  
  
She groggily propped herself up on the couch to sit up with slapdash posture. The hood that rested on her head slid back slightly, revealing her sparkling green eyes. Her chapped lips cracked as they formed into a smile. “It is one of many to come,” she assured with as much determination in her voice as she could muster given her current state.

A notable amount of time had passed where the two of them had sat or stood silently, their eyes wondering aimlessly. The room had little in it, but among the few things were dog tags strewn together on a single chain. They hung on the wall above the sofa. It was a constant reminder to Shepard of all those she couldn’t save when the first Normandy had been destroyed. However; her quarters had some brighter things decorating the walls. Framed photographs of some seemingly random places on Earth caught Javik’s attention. Shepard watched him, seemingly lost in thought. She followed his gaze to a picture of the sunset on a beach.  
  
Javik pondered a moment before speaking. “Even before I was born, our worlds had been destroyed in the war against the reapers,” he said, still fixated on the photo. “All I ever knew was wasteland, ruin and destruction.” His somber tone made Shepard frown. She thought of all of the Earth’s beauty and how delicate it truly was. _Could it hold up to the reapers?_ She hoped to end the war with the Earth unscathed.  
  
Javik looked at her. “It was all much like Tuchanka.” Anger burned in his eyes. “Only, the krogan race caused such destruction to their planet.”  
  
Shepard looked back quizzically. _What is he getting at?_ She cocked her head, causing the hood to fall completely down and expose her mess of hair. She blinked hard and shook her head, realizing she had been rude. She held out her hand to the vacant couch and offered him to sit. He obliged and nodded before taking a seat.  
  
"The krogan should have died out long ago. Their self-destructive mindsets and unnecessary aggression make them weak." It was clear he was angry. Upon seeing the hurt in Shepard’s eyes, he seemed to restrain himself. He remembered she had krogan friends. He went on to make his point. "The scientists of my time believed in 'the cosmic imperative'. The strong flourished. The weak perished.” His rage had subsided, but he still spoke coldly.  
  
“Is this something that was proven or was it just their opinion?” she asked skeptically with a bitter undertone.  
  
Javik waved an open hand horizontally. “The universe had already proven it. They only had to look around.”  
  
“And what was it they saw, exactly?” She was curious, but still upset with this finding.  
  
“Extinction is the rule of law in the cosmos; the natural order of things,” he explained almost reflecting her sorrow. “The weakest species are doomed.”  
  
“It’s the duty of the strong to protect the weak.” Shepard crossed her arms and leaned back into the comfy sofa. “Otherwise, we’d have anarchy.”  
  
He continued, seeming to ignore her. “But those who had nothing to offer would be eliminated,” he said darkly.  
  
She frowned. “So conflict should be a way of life?”  
  
“Evolution demands it. The strong grow stronger by dominating the weak. It is for the greater good of all,” he stated mater-of-factly. Shepard lowered her head, defeated. “You are far too concerned with the survival of all species," he noted. **“They do not all deserve to live.”  
**  
This caught her attention. She rest balled fists into the tops of her thighs and leaned forward. “Well, this is a different cycle. The strong need to protect the weak. All life matters. Some chose to waste it, but that shouldn’t condemn an entire race. In this cycle, the races now protect one another, not dominate.” The rant made her realize how exhausted she really was. She let out a long sigh and looked him deep in the eyes. **“You will have to adjust if you’re going to live in it.”** The Prothean slipped off her tongue naturally. She was becoming comfortable with it, and she didn’t mind.  
  
He shared the deep gaze with her briefly before shaking his head. “We are all a product of our time. Had I been born in this cycle, perhaps I would be in agreement with you.”  
  
“You? Really?” She couldn’t help but chuckle a bit. Images of him muttering profane insults in Prothean about the primitives aboard the ship while they passed by him popped into her mind. She could not envision him a diplomat.  
  
Javik shrugged and rubbed his hands over his exposed knees. They still felt a bit damp from the water he had been rinsing in earlier. “I wouldn’t know. Living a life of constant war, taking life in every battle...” His eyes fixated on the floor.  
  
Shepard was feeling sorry for him. How anyone could deal with the situation he was in was a mystery to her. “I see how it could be tough to see things outside the box,” she said compassionately; sensitive to the suffering he must have endured and still would. She slid down the sofa to get closer to him. It may have been the alcohol that numbed her nerves, but she didn’t feel as frightened as she usually did around him. She thought briefly about the first time she had touched him on Eden Prime and what she saw. She wondered what she may see, or feel, if she touched him again.  
  
Javik didn’t seem to mind she moved to be near him. “It is the only ‘box’ I have known,” he said simply, not looking up. He slowly rubbed his fingertips together with one hand still idle on his knee. “It shapes me. As stone is shaped by the one who carves it. The stone has no choice in the form it will take.” He looked up and locked eyes with her as he continued. “You and I, Commander... war is our sculptor. And we are prisoners to its design.”  
  
Her eyes trembled. She was absorbing all of his words meanwhile still thinking back to the moment on Eden Prime. **“I’m going to end this war and set us both free,”** she said as sincerely as could possibly be spoken. Hesitantly, she set her hand on his.  
  
She couldn’t feel much of anything at first, just warmth. His hand was cool, but she felt warmed from the inside out. Their gazes remained entwined for a few more seconds before he slowly shut his eyes and turned his hand over so their palms were touching. Shepard felt an overwhelming urge to also shut her eyes and obediently complied to her body’s call.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I found this conversation very emotional. He opens up a bit, and Shepard sees how out of place he feels. He doesn't have anything to live for, other than to kill reapers. If he was a romance-able, I'm sure this would be a place special romance dialog options would have been put in.


	16. Shaped by War: Part Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part two

Indescribable streams of colors swirled all about, wrapping around her then bolting forward. They painted a scene before her: A pale orange sunset in a cloudless sky drooped into a canyon filled with a navy blue sea. There a few bare trees that clung to the walls of the rock, leaning towards the vast waters. She stood beside Javik on a cliff overlooking the canyon. “Where are we?” she asked in awe.  
  
When he didn’t answer, she looked over to him. He just looked off into the distance. Upon further observation, she realized he was caked in blood. Gunshots and explosions could be heard in the near distant.  
  
“Javik?” She tilted her head. He turned around and grabbed the weapon from his back. As he walked away, Shepard followed. Her legs grew heavy and she began to drag her feet as though she was shackled to the ground. A sheet of blackness covered the world from behind them and Javik ran without looking back. Shepard cried out to him one last time before she was consumed by total darkness. The immense weight she felt pulling at her caused her to collapse to her knees.  


It had felt like hours that she had been sitting alone. All of her senses had become entirely deprived. There was no sound or smell. She couldn’t even feel if it was hot or cold there, but it didn’t seem like room temperature.  


Suddenly, she heard the familiar hum of the Normandy. There was a bright flash and she shielded her eyes with her forearm. As she slowly pulled her arm away, a room of the ship materialized around her. A light breeze from above weaved through her hair. She looked up to find the source of the draft. It was just a ventilation fan.  
  
A voice came from behind her. “Had to be me...” She turned so quickly, she nearly gave herself whiplash.  
  
“Mordin...” she whispered, eyes beginning to swell. There he was. They were in his laboratory aboard the Normandy. She took a step forward eagerly, but froze in her tracks when she noticed Mordin already had company: herself. She remained completely still, observing the scene before her. Mordin and the other Shepard were talking to each other about something, but she couldn’t understand. All of their speech seemed garbled. Yet, it felt like she recognized this particular moment. “It’s a memory,” she muttered to herself.  
  
Shepard could only enjoy Mordin’s presence a moment longer before everything began to blur again. It was as though someone pressed the fast forward button on a video. All of the conversations she ever had with Mordin here played out at super-speed. The flood of emotion pouring over her was bittersweet. She could recall every memory and moment with him as though it had just happened. She smiled as tears of joy and pain rolled down her rosy cheeks.  
  
And then it just stopped; as plainly as it had started.  
  
Shepard wiped the tears from her eyes roughly with balled fists. She kept her eyes closed when she pulled her hands away and took a great breath in.  
  
**“Experience is a biological marker,”** Javik’s voice echoed. She reopened her eyes sharply and found herself on Tuchanka again. The smell of smoke burned her nostrils. She was fully dressed in her armor and staring Mordin in the face before the shroud.  
  
_No,_ she tried to cry out but her lips wouldn’t move. No part of her body would move. _Please, stop!_ She was forced to relive this terrible memory once again motionless. The alcohol she consumed to drown it from her mind had gone to waste. It felt as real as the moment it truly happened. When Mordin departed in the elevator one more time, she regained control of her body. She collapsed to the ground on all fours and sobbed uncontrollably.  


Shepard felt a hand rest on her back. She rubbed her arm over her eyes and turned to see who had touched her. It was Javik. He was crouched behind her. He slowly removed his hand and rose. There was a look about him that comforted her. He seemed far less bitter and stern; strong yet softer somehow. He offered an outstretched hand and she took it willingly. He pulled her back onto her feet and she showed instant gratitude by wrapping her arms around him tightly. She buried her face in his chest and whimpered, fighting the tears. She didn’t fear the consequences of this outburst. All she knew was she needed comfort in the nearest being.  
  
Javik didn’t tense up or seem hesitant like she would have normally expected from such an emotion-driven action. Rather, he also embraced her; resting his head in her fiery red hair.  
  
  
The wind picked up around them rather violently. The light faded once again. Shepard’s arms pulled into her chest as Javik just disappeared. A content smile tugged her lips. She felt peaceful this time in the hollow darkness.

 

-

 

Shepard opened her eyes. She was back in her quarters in the Normandy; safely seated on her sofa. Once she was confident she truly was where she thought, she remembered touching Javik and setting off an emotional chain of events. She carefully turned her head to see if he was still there in the room.  
  
Javik was still sitting beside her, though his hands were interlocked with one another. She realized her own hands were resting in her lap. She turned away and hung her head, feeling rather embarrassed. Part of her wished she was just dreaming the whole thing, though it seemed that was not the case. She was unsure of what to say. It was such an emotional roller coster, but it left her feeling much better. As though she had mourned Mordin’s death for quite some time and the pain had been lifted entirely: purged from all hurting.

 

-

 

The two of them sat in silence for a significant amount of time. The liquor Shepard had consumed worked its way through her system and she could no longer feel its effects. She began to wonder what exactly Javik experienced when they touched; however, she was far too nervous to ask. She hoped it wasn’t what she experienced. Her walls went up as she thought about it. What she was exposed to was very revealing and she felt naked and at a disadvantage. She expected to learn more about him from a touch, but it may have just been the other way around. She fidgeted in her seat and snuck a glance over at Javik. He was watching her.  
  
“You and the salarian... were close?” he asked when their eyes met.  
  
Shepard frowned, but she surprised herself with her lack of sadness. She still felt peaceful; like it was okay to talk about Mordin. A few hours ago, she didn’t want to talk to anyone about anything – especially not Mordin. “Yes,” she replied quietly.  
  
Javik looked at her expectantly. Certain at this point they shared all of her memories of Mordin, she wasn’t entirely sure what to say. Again, she wondered how much he knew. She exhaled slowly and her dry lips curled into a smile.  
  
“I always knew I could go to him for whatever I needed,” she admitted. At this point, she didn’t care what she revealed because he most likely already knew. “Be it a medical inquiry, or just to chat. I found him fun and easy to talk to. Most of our shipmates couldn’t tolerate him, let alone understand what he was saying.” She thought of the Normandy filled with Cerberus crew. It wasn’t that long ago she considered them all her allies. Mordin would have never betrayed her the way the rogue organization did. “I never grew bored of his rants, even if I didn’t know exactly what he was talking about.” She turned her head and stared at the empty glass bottles lying on the table. “He was just a great friend,” Shepard finished with.  
  
Javik pondered, unsure of how to respond. He couldn’t relate. “I believe some of the crew wishes to be my friend,” he finally said. She looked back at him slightly shocked. “That is not my purpose here.”  
  
He didn’t sound cold, but possibly lonely, Shepard thought. She could make friends with other races quite easily, but his situation was far more complicated. “You don’t need a reason to make friends,” Shepard assured. “Most of the time, it just happens. It’s pretty unexpected. Before I became a specter, I never expected to have so many non-human friends.” She shrugged and flashed him a warm smile. **“I consider you my friend,”** she added.  
  
Javik blinked slowly. Shepard wasn’t sure if he looked shocked or irritated. His lack of a response caused her smile to fade. He stood up and began to walk for the door. He stopped before the stairs and turned to her.  
  
“I would have taken the deal with the Dalatrass,” he admitted. "Allies are simply tools to be used against the reapers." He paused and looked away. “You cannot care what others think. Do as you must.” With that, he left to retreat to his own quarters.  
 


	17. Treachery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cerberus attempts to take the Citadel station.

The Citadel: The center of galactic civilization. Recognized as the galaxy's greatest diplomatic achievement. It was home to countless individuals of varying species. A colossus port that was easily accessible from nearly any cluster. More recently, it provided a temporary safe haven for many of the war's refugees.

Shepard stood in little more than a graveyard now. The Citadel's C-Sec corridors were heavy with the stench of blood and singed flesh. Corpses hunched over against walls or still sitting at the desks where they were working moments ago. The once loud and busy hub had come to a standstill. No voices or sky cars could be heard, but only the sprinklers pouring down overhead and the short circuiting of terminals.

It was an eerily similar setting for her. One she found herself in just a few years ago. The reaper's first attempt to claim the Citadel, through Saren. Only, this time, it was not the geth before her; but another human.

Simply a man, dressed in black and clearly marked by Cerberus. He danced before her as he dodged the drell Thane's bullets. Javik and EDI stood on either side of her, their weapons frantically following the man's every movement. But as he moved in closer to Thane, it became clear to them there was not going to be an opportunity.

The masked Cerberus man unarmed him in a flurry of martial arts styled movements. The two fought, seeming to be equally matched despite Thane's weakened state. Though with no weapon, he knew his bare hands were no match for the assailant's katana. Once he found the opening, he dove for his pistol and turned around to fire. Unfortunately, he was slightly quicker than Thane at this moment and penetrated his abdomen with his blade.

Shepard’s eyes locked on the masked man as her friend’s body crumpled to the floor. She shot at him as quickly as her finger could wrap around the trigger. He deflected her projectiles with a concentrated biotic field from a device on his hand and dashed to the nearest exit. She pursued him, heart pounding and fueled with rage. Her hatred for Cerberus grew each day: all of their betrayal and unnecessary bloodshed had given her nothing but grief long before the war even began.

  
Shepard had chased the assassin to a balcony where another Cerberus traitor was waiting for him in a sky car. She continued to fire at him, even throwing in a few overloads in a desperate attempt to shatter the barrier he mastered. She just couldn’t touch him. Skidding to a halt, she nearly fell off of the ledge in her frenzy.

Shots fired from behind her at the fleeing car.  
“Thane!” she cried out as her blood turned cold.

Thane limped out onto the balcony, his pistol still in hand. He leaned up against the wall and slid down it to sit, painting it with his blood. Javik already stood beside him with his omni-tool out, reading the victim’s vitals. He looked down at Shepard who was now crouching beside Thane.  
He couldn’t help but feel a bit upset, knowing her former crew member, and friend, may die. She had just endured the death of a close friend. How many of her friends would remain by the end of the war, he wondered.  
  
“Are you alright?” she whimpered, trying to sneak a glance at the stab wound, but Thane clutched it tightly.  
“Go,” he choked out.  
  
She wasn’t convinced, but she knew there was nothing she could do and someone needed to stop that assassin. Returning to her feet, she backed slowly away keeping her eyes locked on him while radioing Commander Bailey to update him of the situation. She informed him of the salarian councilor's revelation that Udina was the one who staged the coup and that Thane needed immediate medical attention. Noticing a parked C-Sec squad car during the quick brief, she motioned for Javik and EDI to get in.  
“Let’s go save the council, again,” she whispered solemnly.

 

-

 

Shepard and the gang had caught up with the getaway vehicle. The Cerberus driver noticed and hit the brake hard. C-Sec cruiser just zipped below it. The masked assassin landed on the hood of the car causing the nose to dip down a bit. Shepard grabbed her pistol immediately and shot a few rounds into the windshield. Just her luck: it was shatterproof. The man just looked back at her with a menacing smirk.  
  
“Javik,” she snarled while kicking the door open. Javik’s eyes widened when he looked over and saw her already half way out of the car. He slid over into her seat to take over the controls. Her demand to have him take over a vehicle completely foreign to him and not the AI in the back would have puzzled him, had his immediate action not had been required.

While Javik frantically attempted to maintain control of the sky car, Shepard clung to the side and shot at the assassin. He practically frolicked gleefully around her bullets, enraging her further. She growled in frustration and the man chuckled, stabbing his katana into the car’s innards. Smoke poured from the gaping hole and the Cerberus woman in the sky car crept back into view. The man jumped back in, but Shepard continued to fire while screaming at him.

“Commander!” Javik frantically yelled from within the car. Flashing warnings flooded the monitor of the car’s controls in partner with undesirable beeps. Shepard slid back into the cab, practically landing in Javik’s lap. Realizing there was no saving their vehicle, she was able to turn it just enough to yield a route that an impact may not kill them.  
  
“Hold on everyone,” she warned through gritted teeth. EDI grabbed onto the back of Shepard’s seat and Javik straightened an arm out to push against the dash. With just enough time to assume these positions, the car collided with an unlucky store. Thankfully, it appeared to be vacant.

 

Shepard stumbled out of the smoking vehicle, landing on her hands. She grimaced as she rose to her feet. The impact would leave her with a few bruises, at least, she figured. EDI climbed out next, who just brushed off a bit of debris. She appeared unscathed.

Javik, on the other hand, clung to everything he could as he dragged himself out of the car. Shepard tilted her head at him, contemplating if she should offer to help. She was still wary of touching him since their previous incident. He wobbled his way to a weak stance and leaned up against the totaled car. He shook his head and grabbed his gun off of the seat before stiffly walking towards them.

In the commotion, Cerberus troops had begun to investigate. A few units were deployed to dispose of the three. They fired on the wounded party, showing no remorse. With no choice, or chance to recover, the squad shot back from behind cover in the store they reduced to shambles.  
  
"Your body language indicates you have sustained injury," EDI noted while sending out incineration bolts at Cerberus soldiers.  
  
Javik rubbed his head and bared his teeth in pain. "I did not wear a restraint harness while in the vehicle."  
  
"You could ask the commander for a medi-gel," she suggested.  
  
Javik looked over at the Commander, who was now smiling at him, after EDI's suggestion. He hesitated, just staring at her soft and inviting face. Despite all that had happened, she was very collected and calm now.  
"Placing sludge on my head will not cure a concussion,” he replied stubbornly while he sharply looked away. He vaulted over the cover they shared and threw pain-fueled biotics down the stretch of Citadel shops, knocking down several unsuspecting troops. “Now let’s fight!"

 

-

 

It only took them a few minutes to clear their path of hostiles. They ventured forward to find the nearest working elevator. Glass crunched beneath them with nearly every step they took. Civilian and Citadel security corpses lay out in the corridors all the same. The stench of spent clips still lingered.  
  
_Udina did this- killed all of these innocent people while they were just doing their jobs. Or enjoying themselves. I’ll kill that bastard my damn self._ Shepard gripped her weapon tight, wishing it was the human councilor’s neck. He had been a thorn in her side since day one: Only looking after himself and always throwing her and Anderson under the bus. She was glad he was the traitor, as it gave her a valid reason to end the miserable rat’s life.  
  
“I sense you’re in contemplation,” EDI chimed, disrupting Shepard’s vengeful thoughts. Opening her mouth, she looked over to EDI to see she was actually speaking to Javik. She watched him, patiently waiting to hear what was on his mind.  
  
His gaze paced between the still bodies, some with weapons still in their clutches. “In my cycle, it is said the Reapers took this station in a matter of hours. To see its inhabitants fight back gives me pause.”  
  
“You are welcome to share your feelings,” she assured. Shepard was rather amused with EDI’s attempt to get Javik to open up.  
  
He stopped walking and looked at the ground. “There is hope for those living now. There was none for my species.” He continued on, refusing to reveal more of his thoughts. “That is all.”  
EDI and Shepard exchanged a concerned glance before following after him.  
  
"The elevator we need is just up ahead," Shepard chimed in an effort to redirect the mood.  


 


	18. Treachery: Part Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part two

The elevator ride the team took was quite unlike any they had ever taken before. They found themselves on top of the elevator car itself, combating Cerberus troopers in their final futile attempt to stop them. Shepard responded by overloading their ride's power conduits, sending it to a screeching halt. Javik pushed any daring lackeys getting to close with a biotic throw; their screams barely audible as they plummeted down the shaft.  
  
"There's the council's elevator!" Shepard yelled, preparing to jump. No matter how limber one may be, nothing prepares one for a high-speed elevator jump like the one they needed to make. "Let's go!"  
  
Javik and EDI followed her without pause. The car bounced as they all landed, causing the car's occupants to cry out. As everyone regained their footing, bullets began flying through the roof. Shepard hopped around attempting to avoid them. The fire ceased as quickly as it began and the elevator slowed to a stop.  
Footsteps scurried below them. Shepard kicked the maintenance hatch open and dropped down. Not seeing anyone in the immediate vicinity, she quickly made her way down the hall.

 

-

 

"Everyone back to the elevator. Move!" barked a familiar voice. Shepard strolled through the doorway with her gun drawn, ready for the worst to come. As Javik and EDI followed behind, EDI smacked the door's control panel and shorted it with a quick overload. There was no taking chances of being crept up on.  
  
Kaidan stood between them and the council. "Shepard?" he mumbled quizzically. He blinked hard, as if he thought he was imagining her standing before him. Remembering his task at hand, he furrowed his brows. "What's going on?"  
  
Without missing a beat, Udina chimed in with pretentious accusations. "Shepard's blocking our escape. She's with Cerberus!" He shifted his weight between his legs, an uneasy look churning on his face.  
Kaidan kept his gun up as he sidled over to cover the gap between Shepard and the council. "Just, hang on," he said over his shoulder. "I've got this. Everyone calm down." His words were spoken calmly, but confusion still lingered in his face.  
  
"I can explain this, Kaidan," Shepard replies slowly.  
  
"Shepard admitted to working with Cerberus," Udina blabbered from behind Kaidan. "For all we know, she's still with them!"  
  
Shepard shoots a glare as he cowers.  
  
There is a thick moment of silence as Kaiden bites his lip in contemplation. "I watched her fight Cerberus troops on Mars. Now, explain that." He was still completely collected, but it didn't seem he wanted an answer. He knew it was complicated.  
  
Deflecting and sensing the urgency of their situation, Shepard took a quick and worried glance back at the elevator doors. "There are Cerberus soldiers in the elevator shaft behind us," she huffed. "If you open that door they'll kill you all!"  
  
Udina squirms while attempting to stare down her down, but her focus is on Kaidan. The asari councilor steps a bit closer to Shepard. "We've mistrusted Shepard before... and it did not help us," she pointed out. The turian councilor nodded after a moment's pause.  
  
Udina scoffed, pivoted on his heel and marched to a nearby console. "We don't have time to debate this," he stated, matter-of-factly. "We're dead if we stay here. I'm overriding the controls."  
Shepard sharply switched her sights to Udina. "You power-hungry snake," she hissed.  
  
Kaidan adjusted his position to block her aim. He was fully aware of what a sharp shooter she was, and she could easily make the shot past or even through him. He shifted uncomfortably, but still stood tall and confidently.  
  
Udina had begun to tap away at the console.  
  
"Please, Kaidan, don't make me shoot you." Shepard's voice was breaking and she was hardly holding her pistol steady. Once she realized this, her weapon lowered completely. Her eyes were swelling and she couldn't risk the shot with the Council right behind him. She would not kill him to save the council.  
  
EDI and Javik, however, kept their lock on him.  
  
"You know me. And I know you. I knew I could always count on you... That is why I chose you on Virmire." He still had her down his weapon sights, but his eyes softened and he lagged back. "Please... Trust me..." Shepard managed to choke out.  
  
The moment seemed to last an eternity, but he finally lowered his weapon and sighed. "Okay Shepard, but I better not regret this." He turned and took aim at Udina.  
She smiled and her shoulders went lax. "You won’t," she whispered.

Feeling the heat, Udina made a desperate attempt to take the asari councilor hostage as a body shield while he fumbled with empty threats, but Kaidan didn't let him take the chance. The motion alone was enough to convict him of his guilt and he was cut down swiftly. One single round was fired right through his head.

Udina's body went limp as it hit the floor.

 

-

 

  
  
It was over.  
  
Shepard could feel her muscles relax. She looked over at EDI who gave her a silent nod, then turned to Javik. He still had his rifle pointed at Kaidan, his face cold and emotionless as ever. As she began to speak, the door behind them had begun to pry open. They all turned and had their guns pointed and ready to fire.  
  
The doors forced open to reveal Commander Bailey and a small group of C-Sec officers. Shepard immediately lowered her weapon. "Bailey?" Her voice did not mask her confusion.  
  
"Made it as fast as we could, Shepard," he said while catching his breath. He scanned the area behind her. "Looks like you, uhh... took care of things."  
  
The remaining councilors approached.  
  
"Something's not right," said the asari councilor, her voice trembling. "You said Cerberus was targeting us. Where did their soldiers go?"  
  
Bailey quickly replied, "Cerberus was right here, but they beat feet into the keeper tunnel when they figured out we were coming." He took a quick gaze back to make sure they weren't followed. "Sorry, councilor, I'll say it plain: Shepard just saved the lot of you."  
  
The asari councilor rubbed her arm and looked to the ground. The turian councilor took the opportunity to thank Shepard, as it wasn't the first time she had saved his hide.  
  
They all spent some time to speculate on what Cerberus' end game was. Stumped, they decide their attention is needed elsewhere. Cerberus was long gone by now.  
  
  
Shepard assures Bailey her and her team will assist in helping C-Sec restore order to the Citadel and provide whatever else they can.  
  
"I'll return to the Normandy and rally all able bodies," Shepard told him. Bailey nodded and left to escort the council somewhere safer. She looked towards Kaidan with a light smile. He returned it and offered to help out as well. "EDI, can you get everyone in the conference room so I can brief them when we get back to the Normandy?"  
  
EDI walks up to Shepard and nods, putting her hand to her head.  
  
Shepard finally looks back at Javik, who has been leaning back against the balcony railing with his arms crossed. His dagger-sharp glare was still focused on Kaidan.  
"Come on, let's go," Shepard calls out to him. He pushes himself from the railing and follows suit; not even giving her a glance.  



	19. Treachery: Part Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part three

Much of the Normandy's crew crowded around the elongated table in the center of the conference room. They muttered to each other quietly, some with worry, wondering what EDI had all called them in for. Their eyes all darted to the war room doors as they slid open; Shepard marching through. Everyone grew quiet as she approached.  
  
She took to the head of the table and tapped at it, preparing her words. Looking at each individual who stood before her, she began to speak.  
  
"As you all know, Cerberus has attacked the Citadel. Many lives were taken by their hands." Her tone is dire, and her expression blank. A few of her men exchanged glances and shifted uncomfortably. She laid her hands out flat against the table. "While we can't bring back the dead, we can restore peace and hope for the living."  
  
Her team looks back at her expectantly, fire in their eyes.  
  
"We are going to take some time here to help with whatever may be needed," she said. "Be it tech repairs, medical assistance, or just playing groundskeeper- I don't care."  
  
James is the first to speak up, or object, rather. "Shouldn't we be more concerned about the reapers? Fighting them? I mean, that's what we do," he stated while shrugging. A few nodded in agreement.  
  
Shepard pushed off the table and sighed quietly. "Yes," she agreed while lifting a hand. "However; if the Citadel were to fall, we would have no hope of actually winning this war." She brought a hand back down and locked eyes with James. The stern look on her face reminded him of the last time he dared to question her orders. He just gave a soft nod.  
  
Shepard looked around the room and began to pace slowly. "The Citadel is vulnerable. C-Sec could use our help in bulking up their defenses. Huerta Memorial is flooded with victims and there are just not enough hands or supplies. Cerberus caused a lot of physical destruction that needs to be addressed."  
  
She stopped and turned back to the group. The majority of them looked confused. She flashed a warm and reassuring smile before continuing. "A good soldier knows to take an opportunity when he sees it. We possess the skills to make a difference. Our presence is not only appreciated, but it is necessary. We _need_ their support. We _need_  them to care about the war. Everyone needs to be on board to win this war." She added a dramatic pause as she watched the gears in their heads begin to churn. "And it starts with us."  
  
The room erupted with encouraged cheers and cries. Some called out her name, some yelled 'for Earth!', and some just laughed and clapped each other on the back. What happened on the Citadel was indeed a tragedy, but it would finally start getting people serious about the war.   
  
With a raised voice, Shepard called out, "I would also like to formally welcome back Major Kaidan Alenko to the Normandy crew." She outstretched her arm to his direction and all eyes shifted to him. Applause followed, and he gave a modest bow with a chuckle.  
  
"Thank you all," he said behind a hearty grin. "It's good to be back."  
  
A few men approached him to shake his hand and spark up conversation. Shepard lingered for a moment, watching contently. The moment of bliss was interrupted by a ping on her omni-tool. She looked down at it promptly before going to leave the room. "Dismissed," she called back halfheartedly. Some stayed behind and exchanged ideas on how they wanted to help, but most followed Shepard out, beaming with confidence.

  
Javik, who was leaning up against the wall in the back of the room, grumbled before finally taking his leave. No one usually paid him any mind anymore, so it was likely no one noticed he had been glaring down Kaidan the entire time they were in the room. He had no intentions of letting a traitor get off so easily, let alone be on his team. He was going to make this perfectly clear to Shepard immediately. His blood boiled the entire elevator ride down to his quarters.  
  
The moment the doors to the cargo bay slid open, he pulled up his omni-tool and called Shepard. She answered just as promptly as he had pinged. "Commander, may we speak?" he asked, hardly attempting to mask how infuriated he was.   
"Already on my way, actually," she answered flatly.

 

-

 

It only took a couple of minutes before Shepard arrived, but Javik had been pacing his room anxiously. She entered while engrossed in her omni-tool, tapping away at it furiously with arched brows. She still wore her armor, her rifle still strapped to her back and her pistol still at her hip. Javik scanned over her briefly until she put away her omni-tool and made eye contact with him. He did not want to give her the chance to speak first.  
  
"Commander, this human pointed his weapon in your face and you welcome him on your ship? You have a death wish." He waved his hand at her and turned away, looking down into his reflection in a water basin.  
  
Her face lightened and she crossed her arms with a smirk. "Are you really that worried about me?"  
  
He continued to stare into the water, watching his emotions change from irritated, to concerned, to fearful, and finally back to angry. Shaking his head, he turned towards her sharply. "I cannot trust him," he deflected with a sneer. "This weak-willed human drew on his superior and threatened the entire security of your precious Citadel. He nearly got all of your government leaders killed. Who's to know if he will slit all our throats while we sleep?"  
  
Shepard was astonished that he dismissed her playful question. She shifted her weight uncomfortably. "Look... Kaidan is a dear friend to me. We have always been close. He was in a difficult position before, I know, but we  _can_  trust him." She was having a hard time answering him: convincing him. He was not there on Eden Prime years ago when it all began.  
  
Javik disregarded her confidence in him. "Traitors are the worst kind of enemy," he stated plainly. "In our cycle, we would remove their limbs one by one and offer them a choice: eat their own flesh or starve." He recollected rather calmly, like there was nothing of it. Shepard's skin crawled with the image forming in her mind. "The human councilor got what he deserved," he declared. "Your so-called 'friend' should have suffered a similar fate. If he was under my command, I assure you, he would have."  
  
She contemplated quietly. It was clear she would not be changing his mind at this time. "If I brought him on a few ground missions with us, would that show you he is trustworthy?" She nervously waited for his reply.  
  
Javik sighed, and turned back to his water basins. He was far from convinced, but unlike the man in question, he ultimately would not go against authority. "Fine; **though it is not likely I will come to trust him**."  
  
She smiled, nodding in approval. "Thank you, Javik. I will show you he can be trusted."  
  
  
It grew quiet in the room, neither deciding to speak or move. Javik repeatedly washed his hands in the tub before him. He seemed to be expecting something of her, though the conversation may have distracted her from her prior intentions. As if whoever was talking to her before could sense this, her omni-tool pinged once more.   
  
"You came down here for a reason?" he asked, somewhat annoyed.  
  
While still looking down at the omni-tool on her arm, she confirmed his inquiry. "Yes, actually," she replied quietly. She finished reading the message and powered it down before looking back at him. During her brief pause before speaking up, he had turned around to face her. "I am going to Omega to reclaim it from Cerberus with Aria."  
  
Javik stared back at her blankly. "And you are asking me to go with you?"  
  
Shepard tilted her head a bit, slightly surprised that he came to that assumption. "No, actually, I need to go alone," she replied trying to hide her shock. "I had to tell someone on the ship in case something were to go wrong and I didn't make it back. Someone I could trust."  
  
He scoffed. "Then why not tell the primitive coward who just tried to kill you - since you appear to trust him so much," he retorted bitterly.  
  
She bit her lip and averted from his cold, golden glare. "I need someone I can trust not to tell anyone else in the meantime," she admitted timidly. "Someone who won't try to convince me not to go. I knew you'd be indifferent, and you're not particularly friendly with anyone aboard..."   
  
She cautiously lifted her eyes back to his. His softened expression confirmed he agreed with her presumptions. He nodded to accept her terms.   
  
"And you don't have to help out on the Citadel if you don't want to," she added, as though she was bribing him. "You're here to fight the reapers. I don't expect you to play diplomat like everyone else."  
  
He blinked slowly at her. Surely, he had no intentions of leaving the Normandy to begin with. She flashed a crooked smirk.  _Of course not_.   
  
She thanked him once more and turned to leave. As the doors slid open, Javik called out from the room. " **I am not telling anyone you are leaving. So you will be coming back**." There wasn't an ounce of doubt in his words.   
  
She paused and smiled to herself, comforted by his confidence in her. " **I'll be seeing you** ," she replied quietly before exiting the room.  



	20. The Extranet is for...?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Javik spends some time surfing the extranet.

Only a couple of days had passed since Shepard's departure for Omega. The entire ship had grown as quiet as the cargo hold that Javik was accustom to. Garrus and James spent their time helping refugees that took over the Citadel's docks. Engineers Adams, Donelly, and Daniels were assisting with repairs big and small. With her endless connections, there wasn't much that Liara wasn't contributing to the cause. Even the Normandy's chef had left to prepare meals for the war refugees and well-earned feasts for those hard at work. There was not an able body who was not assisting as Shepard had instructed - other than Javik, anyway.  
  
He had pulled apart and cleaned his trusty rifle thoroughly, made repairs to small damages in his ceremonial armor, meditated for hours, and even explored the nooks and crannies of the vacant Normandy. The boredom was sinking in. At least between destinations, Shepard would normally pay him a visit or he could occupy his time with preparing for the next mission. This time, he didn't know what to expect. Surely he would be fighting the reapers again soon, but where? When exactly?  
  
Javik exhaled with a long, exaggerated sigh. He looked around his room in hopes of sparking up an idea. The humidifiers in the ceiling hissed as they incorporated warm, wet air into the room. A few moments passed of aimless searching before he retreated to the comfort of the water tables. As he approached them, his eyes caught the monitor in between. There was a green light blinking in the corner. He redirected his path and planted in front of the console. Addressing the source of the light, he opened a message that was sent to it from EDI.  
  
The email was titled 'Some articles you may like to read'. "Hmmm," he grumbled while taking a quick glance around the room again. While EDI took her 'body' off of the Normandy, she still _was_ the ship. Javik had not noticed the message before. Could she have been watching him? His fists balled at the very thought, but he decided to open it anyway.  
  
There was a list of different links inside. Shepard was in the title of a few, a couple about the Citadel, and also one titled 'Dr. Liara T'Soni's published essays OFFICIAL'. He clicked on the first link labeled 'The Citadel: A Complete History' and scoffed. _Complete history of this cycle, anyway_.  
  
He skimmed through the contents. It was a colorful website complete with pictures of how the station looked when the asari first arrived, construction of embassies and other significant buildings, statues being erected, and some famous diplomats shaking hands. While it wasn't quite the entertainment he had hoped for, it was still interesting to see the history and upbringing of this cycle. He found similarities here and there, but as with everything he ultimately still felt his cycle was far superior. As he neared the bottom, it went over Saren's attack a few years ago. It didn't seem to cover everything and there was no mention of a single reaper. It did, however, make note of Shepard's feats in reclaiming the Citadel. 'Commander Kai H. Shepard of the Alliance Navy and first human spectre sacrificed human lives to save that of our current councilors. (To view Commander Kai H. Shepard: A Complete History, click here)'. Having his fill on the history of the Citadel of this cycle, he activated the link.  
  
The page started off with basic information. 'Born April 11th, 2154 of Earth, first human spectre, war hero veteran of the Skyllian Blitz...' Javik scrolled through it quickly. He pulled his hand from the console abruptly as his eyes caught something interesting. 'Kai Shepard went missing sometime in the year 2185. Rumors surfaced she had died in a devastating attack while on a spectre mission. In this popular rumor, it is believed she was resurrected by the human terrorist organization Cerberus. She turned herself into Alliance military authorities and admitted she was working with Cerberus. She claimed to have been assisting the organization for the sole purpose of investigating human colonists disappearances. The alleged kidnappings were blamed on a mysterious species known in the Terminus systems as collectors. There is no solid evidence to these claims, as no missing persons were reported during this time. It has also been noted none have seen a collector since Shepard's disappearance.'  
  
Javik had frozen in place, rereading the paragraph over and over. He needed to know more about two things: the collectors and Shepard's disappearance. Managing to find a search bar, he tapped in 'collectors'. The search yielded sales pages claiming to have rare tech from collectors and conspiracy theories. There were no images or anything that appeared to have any relevant meaning. Immediately, he became frustrated as he searched through the limited search results. His eyes widened and he gasped, remembering who had sent him the original links.  
  
"EDI machine," he called greedily while turning around as quickly as his body would permit.  
  
As he suspected, she responded promptly. "Yes, Javik?"  
  
"I must acquire more information on the species known as the collectors," he demanded.  
  
"Any particular reason, may I ask?," she stalled.  
  
He rubbed his forehead in frustration. _A machine, asking questions... I should not have to justify my means_. Yet Shepard's whole 'diplomacy' speech lingered in the very back of his thoughts. "I... would just like to know more of the Commander's mission in the year of 2185," he managed to say in the kindest tone he could muster while addressing a machine.  
  
"I've done readings on the collectors myself. I can tell you all you need to know about them, if that is your desire. However, if it is information about Shepard's death you seek, it may be best received from Doctor T'Soni."  
  
He turned back to the screen that EDI likely had access to, his pupils narrowing. _Can it read my thoughts, too?_ he pondered. He shook his head in frustration. "I will not speak to the asari of this matter," he stated plainly while gesturing dismissively. "How else may I access this information?"  
  
EDI did not reply immediately and Javik tapped his foot impatiently while looking around the room. Just as he opened his mouth to speak again, his omni-tool pinged. He accepted the communication.  
  
"You will have to go to Doctor T'soni's quarters. There, she has a terminal linked to her knowledge databases. It houses any and all information on Shepard's time with Cerberus." Javik looked at his omni-tool expectantly as she spoke through it. "I shall tell you what I know about the collectors as you make your way there," she added.  
  
He nodded and left his room promptly, addressing the elevator controls accordingly as EDI spoke. "When I scanned the corpse of a collector on their ship during one of Shepard's missions, I compared two thousand alleles of collector DNA samples to noted fragments of Prothean DNA. I found them to be an almost exact match. The slight discrepancies in the DNA samples were likely due to reaper modifications."  
  
Javik lowered his arm and looked off to the side. As the elevator crept to a halt, he spoke. "So, they survived into this cycle?"  
  
"It was not realized until nearly the end of the mission that the collectors were once prothean," EDI added, in what seemed like an attempt to comfort him. "They had all been indoctrinated over such a long time. Shepard had no choice but to exterminate them."  
  
Javik looked up to the doors as they opened. He lingered for a moment. Any sorrow that may have been in his eyes drained away and was replaced with pride. He left the elevator car with a nod. "Then I am grateful," he admitted. "It was an act of mercy."

 

-

 

Liara's room was just as lifeless as the rest of the ship. It was incredibly bright, mainly due to the abundance of monitors. Javik went to what appeared to be the terminal that were linked to said monitors. Fidgeting with the controls, he didn't know where to begin. There were just so many programs and documents... His eyes darted wildly across the screen.  
  
"Try here," EDI chimed. A program was activated and promptly popped up on the monitors before him. "Personnel files are kept in here, it seems."  
  
Javik sifted through the countless documents. It took him a little while, but he eventually found Shepard's file. It was filled to the brim with information. He quickly skimmed through the mounds of classified intel and her complete biography. Nearing the end of it, he found the bit he was looking for.  
  
It explained from Liara's own perspective. She was present during the council-assigned mission that ultimately led to Shepard's demise, and had complete recollection of the events to follow. Every little detail, from when Liara had went to the planet Shepard's body fell to, to the deal between the former Shadow Broker and Cerberus. Liara even put in her own personal input, saying how she felt Cerberus had better connections and if there was any hope of Shepard's revival; it would be with them. The archived information was devoid of any emotion; however, it left out any feelings Liara had for Shepard at that time.  
  
Ultimately, what Javik had read, it all confirmed the rumors stated in the informative website. Shepard's death, then revival by Cerberus, and finally her battle against the prothean indoctrinated collectors. He stared at the monitors blankly. For some reason, it hadn't taken him by complete surprise. He did question why she hadn't mentioned her death previously; yet how would one work that into a conversation, anyway? It seemed they had much more in common than he originally thought. Though he had not physically died, he had still been resurrected into the next cycle. They both were brought back for one main reason: to fight the reapers. Seemingly misunderstood, they still stood strong for the cause against the real threat.  
  
Javik looked away from the screen down to the floor. He imaged her in his mind; her bright and warm smile, how she was kindhearted to her friends yet ruthless opponent to her foes, her tactful skills both in diplomacy and combat... In his cycle, she would have likely have been as revered then as she is now. A grin crept at his lips. He imaged her in his time, fighting along side the prothean people against the reapers. Just maybe, had this happened, his cycle would have persevered.  
  
  
"Have you found all you were looking for, Javik?" EDI's call broke his deep contemplation.  
  
He closed his eyes briefly before letting out a sigh. Powering down the program, he exited Liara's cabin. "Yes," he replied. Once he reached the elevator to retreat to his own quarters again, he looked down to his omni-tool. "Thank you for the assistance, EDI machine," he managed to say. He nearly choked on the words, but had he not had her help, he may have never known the truth. Surely, Shepard would have never told him nor would he have thought to ask.  
  
"You're welcome Javik," she said rather proudly. "Would you like for me to send more links to your terminal?"  
  
He shook his head. "I think I would like to leave the ship for some time." Chuckling bitterly, he began to wonder if Shepard's diplomacy was rubbing off on him a bit. With the Citadel free of traitors, he figured it'd be an appropriate time to visit it.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to lillilah for the internet/extranet fiasco I was having :D Updated!


	21. An Attempt at Diplomacy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Javik braves the Citadel in an attempt to spread some diplomacy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentine's Day / International Fanworks Day! :)

While the Normandy crew was still toiling away and rallying hope for the war, the Citadel was just as loud and busy as ever. Refugees and military personnel were searching for their families all the same, though typically with no luck. Despite how frantic the general population had become, many took to the various clubs. People were just trying to forget: trying to live while they could. It was apparent the war had sunk in to the station's inhabitants.

Confident at the time, Javik had made his way onto the Citadel in an attempt to help the team effort. However, he spent all his time exploring and avoiding as many people as was physically possible. He perused some stores that had already bounced back into business. The tech of this cycle was underdeveloped, he thought, but he let his curiosity get the better of him.

EDI sent out a general message to the entire crew, stating that Shepard would like everyone to report back to the Normandy by 20:00. Sensing his endeavor was nearing its end, Javik had wound up at the embassies. He wondered for a bit, experiencing the full diplomatic diversity this cycle had to offer. There was no denying this concept was completely foreign to him. It continued to baffle him: the way so many different species could cooperate and live among one another.  
  
Meandering his way through the crowds of diplomats, soldiers, commandos, and spectres, his gaze caught a large window in a corner. It framed a beautiful image of what was likely the Citadel's presidium. There were flourishing gardens. Tiny sky cars buzzed around. He could even make out the busy-bodied individuals, tiny as ants. A peaceful scene lay out before him, as he just observed with fervent eyes.

 

  
-

 

  
"Heard you might be here," Shepard's voice called out from behind, nearly startling Javik. He could not recollect how long he had been staring out the window, admiring the view like an artistic masterpiece.  
  
"How did you find me?" he asked, not bothering to pull his gaze away from the Citadel below them.  
  
Shepard chuckled and crossed her arms while she planted next to him. "Apparently, protheans don't go unnoticed around here." She looked around. A few from the crowds whispered while taking quick glances at Javik. With a smile she turned her attention back to him. He was still completely fixated on the window. "Hell of a view, isn't it?" She decided to join his enamored gaze of the vista.  
  
He tilted his head and narrowed his eyes, possibly fixating on something far off in the distance. He blinked slowly before addressing Shepard. "During our war, this place became a myth to my people. A dream glimpsed only in the memory shards. The Citadel was both the heart of our civilization and its demise."  
  
Shepard immediately thought back to when Sovereign attempted to take the station through Saren. Had she not been able to stop him, this cycle may have very well ended just as the previous one did. "The reapers hit here first, didn't they?" she asked sympathetically.  
  
Javik took a step back from the window and shifted beneath his armor. His eyes remained focused outside. "No one I knew had ever seen the Citadel. To be here now... I don't know what to think." Though his gaze remained unchanged, his tone was sullen.  
  
She was quick to give an attempt at consoling him. "It might not seem like much, but a prothean is standing on the Citadel, alive." He finally pulled his eyes from the window to meet hers. "That's a victory in itself," she pointed out confidently.  
  
Upon seeing her tired and worn face, he recalled what he had learned earlier. The light in his eyes dimmed. They both had gotten a second chance. It would be foolish to assume a third would come around and this war was only beginning. His pessimism was getting the better of him. " **Perhaps** ," he mumbled, pulling away for a moment in contemplation before looking back at her. Determination persevered in her eyes despite the dark bags beneath them. A grin tugged at his lips. "When things were at their darkest, we used to tell stories, imagining the wonder of this place." Part reminiscence and part inspiration, he shared his own experience. He looked back out the window, a smile now firmly painted on his face. "The seat of our empire... the power to sway worlds. The galaxy belonged to us."  
  
Shepard noticed the familiar flicker of dominance in his eyes. She tilted her head and smirked. She let him have this moment for himself, until she felt the unsettling feeling of being watched. As if she could feel something breathing down her neck, she motioned her head behind them. "Nowadays, a lot of races have embassies here."  
  
Javik turned with her, glancing around the room. Though his time on the Citadel had confirmed what the extranet factual page already stated, it still meant more coming from Shepard's mouth. "It is true, then? You share power with the rest?" His tone reflected pure bafflement.  
  
She nodded, looking vaguely proud. "It's not perfect," she admitted, "but it's kept the peace." There was a brief pause before she corrected herself. "Well, most of the time." She looked toward him, almost flinching in preparation for his typical backlash. However, he was staring down the being that was guilty of watching them.  
  
Javik sharply turned to the culprit: a hanar. Worry flashed on Shepard's face as she watched with caution.  
  
"Pardon me," the hanar spoke, voice trembling. "This one has been listening. This one suspects you are a prothean." Its voice was much more bashful than any hanar Shepard had heard before. She lingered behind Javik as he stomped over to the eavesdropper. As he went to touch the hanar, Shepard took a hasty step forward with her arm outstretched. It was too late; however, as he had already made physical contact and was reading it. She held her breath while biting her lip, just waiting for him to go off.  
  
While Javik got his reading, eyes shut, his expression softened. He opened his eyes and lowered his arm. "A hanar," he stated. "I remember your kind when you were still minnows in the ocean." He spoke quietly, still demonstrating a nostalgic nature.  
  
Shepard exhaled in relief. Deciding it would be safe to approach now, she took her place at Javik's side.  
  
The hanar shook, glowing with its bio-luminescence as it spoke. "This one is unworthy!" it cried out. "This one has seen the face of an Enkindler!"  
  
The corners of Shepard's lips pulled ear to ear as she held back her laughter. How she had wished hanar wore pants, as surely this one would have been pissing them. "They consider your kind to be their gods," she explained to Javik, attempting to straighten out her face.  
  
Expecting his face to beam with satisfaction, it actually held shame. "A pity we did not teach them to speak better."  
  
The encounter attracted a pair of diplomats to wonder over. One of them, a timid asari, fiddled with her hands. "You're really a prothean?" she asked in complete disbelief. She looked over to her turian company in skepticism, then back to Javik.  
  
Allowing the wonder to steep a little longer, he shifted his weight while looking over the three different species that stood before him, completely fascinated. "I am," he said, without a hint of bitterness.  
  
The asari looked to the ground. "But... if you lost the last war, what hope do we have?" Her voice was heavy with fear.  
  
Shepard remained completely still while Javik gave her his harsh, yet honest answer. "For many, there may be no hope."  
  
The diplomats shook their head as their eyes became moist with the threat of tears. This was not about to stop him from giving them his piece of mind in full force. Instead, he turned away and raised his voice, speaking in his resentful tone that Shepard was familiar with. "The reapers killed trillions in my cycle. The odds of being among the living are remote." He paused and looked over to Shepard, disapproval marking her face. He thought back to her motivating speech on the Normandy just days ago. The one that was so moving, the entire ship was vacant mere moments after. He, too, had left the comfort of the structure he recognized as home for the time being, in an effort to assist in some way. He blinked slowly at her, realizing the mission was nearing its end. This might have been the only chance he had to leave his 'diplomatic mark' on the residents of the Citadel.  
  
He looked back out the window. The peaceful and triumphant view seemed to give him the inspiration that he sought. "But you are still alive now," he said, much more cordially than before, before turning back around. "That alone is a miracle. And you still have the power to fight." He stood nearly toe-to-toe with them now, his golden orbs virtually piercing into their very souls. "My people knew your kind when you were young. Turian, asari, hanar," he glimpsed each one as he spoke. "There was potential in all of you."  
  
He raised a balled fist and lowered his head, giving him a menacing yet commanding presence. "Now your kind must seize that potential and become the weapon you were meant to be - the one that tells the reapers we are not machines!" His voice rose with each word in a crescendo of fiery power.  
  
The diplomats looked at him, eyes glimmering with newfound insight.  
  
"We are alive. And we will fight back!" His vengeful cries echoed throughout the room.  
  
The asari, standing tall and confident, nodded in appreciation. "Thank you," she said sincerely, all doubt clear from her voice. "That meant a lot." She turned her head and addressed the now beaming Shepard. "Commander Shepard, it must be an honor to have a prothean fighting alongside you." There was a flicker of jealousy in her tone.  
  
Shepard put her hands on her hips and smirked. "He's starting to learn his way around," she replied modestly. She looked over him in the same awe the curious diplomats did. "Javik is one of the best soldiers I've ever seen." Without attempting to stroke his ego too much, she tried to state this as nonchalantly as she could muster.  
  
He cocked his head as he looked over at her. "The commander is a capable warrior as well." He exchanged praises as she gave a wide smile. "For a human. Who once lived in caves." _There it is_. Her grin faded as his formed.  
  
He observed the diplomats before him once more before they bowed and took their leave. " **Thank you, Commander. I have enjoyed my time here walking among the... young**." He peered into her eyes as if searching for something. It was brief, but whatever he saw completely changed his mood. " **I will see you back on the Normandy**." He rushed past her, clearly having his fill of the Citadel and diplomacy.  
  
  
Shepard still held a pleased grin as she watched him leave. Enjoying the view out the window briefly, her exhaustion finally settled in. She put her hand to her face and let it slide down. Checking the time, she realized she would have a bit of time to sneak in a quick nap before addressing the crew to prepare for their next mission.


	22. Vengeance for the Fallen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard expresses her gratitude to Javik for keeping a secret.

With everyone back aboard the Normandy, Shepard had made them all aware of their next destination and mission. Dealing with Cerberus had become a priority. Specialist Traynor had stumbled across some intel on Cerberus defector scientists. Aware of how important researching reaper tech was to the Illusive Man, Shepard understood just how important these scientists could be for their war effort.   
  
"I want everyone on stand-by," Shepard told her team. "I don't know how complicated this extraction is going to be just yet. We will reach the Cerberus bunker in approximately four hours." She waved her hand to dismiss everyone, allowing them to make their preparations.

 

-

 

Shepard took the opportunity to visit Javik in his quarters, where she knew he would be meditating and preparing for battle. He stood before his water basins, rinsing his hands with closed eyes and a collective look on his face. When she walked through the doors, he remained completely still. He acknowledged her plainly as the doors closed behind her. "Commander."   
  
She began to approach him, but his shoulders tensed. Freezing in her tracks, she rubbed her arm and looked at the unoccupied table beside him. "I wanted to thank you for keeping quiet about my mission on Omega," she muttered quietly. Her eyes darted to him as he grumbled.  
  
"Of course," he replied directly.   
  
The room fell back into the silence that Javik had been accustom to the past week or so. Shepard contemplated leaving, but also considered making him aware of just how important it was to her. Arguably, it wasn't asking much: especially not of the individual she had chosen. She sighed while her feelings battled inside.  
  
"I assume you were successful in your mission then?" She nearly jumped as Javik's voice rung out unexpectedly. He held his hands above the tub, allowing remnant water droplets to return to it.  
  
Her gaze fell to the floor; brows heavy. "Yes," she confirmed, though glumly. Javik turned away from the basins and finally approached her. She did not lift her eyes to meet his. "Aria was one of the meanest, heartless son-of-a bitches I've ever met. There was no question - she was going to take back Omega no matter what the cost." Shepard kept her hand around her elbow, maintaining her timid posture. "Someone helped us. Someone who was once very close to Aria." She chuckled, a slapdash grin pulling at her lips. "I didn't think she was capable of compassion towards others, without it benefiting her, anyway. But this..." Her eyes rose up to meet his, which were already locked on her. "She cared so deeply for her. And when she died, I... I could _feel_  it. How it broke her. How it hurt her. Worse than Omega being taken from her." Her body trembled as her emerald eyes dampened. Their brightness reflected Javik's completely memorized stare.   
  
Shepard's brows furrowed without warning as her face transformed into an unforgiving scowl. "Cerberus created, or rediscovered, these... monsters," she hissed. "Adjutants." Her hands fell to her side in balled fists. "They were like something out of a vintage zombie horror movie. They infected their victims, and made more. Hard to kill and just absolutely terrifying to look at." Her face grew pale as she described them, her eyes focusing on the floor once again.   
  
"Nyreen," she whispered. "She was just too afraid of them. It bothered her too much - that they were once friends, neighbors."  
  
Silence fell over them once more while Shepard collected herself. Javik did not interrupt and simply waited patiently for her to continue.   
  
She inhaled then exhaled deeply as she wore a look of acceptance. "I've been conditioned to fight reapers over all this time. Killing husks doesn't bother me anymore." Her voice betrayed her, still sounding rather troubled by it all. "They were human once. All of them. A mother or father, a sister or a brother... someone's child, at one point."   
  
Javik tilted his head and shifted his weight, borderline mockingly. This was his life. It was all he had known. Eliminating his own kind who had fallen to the hands of the reapers. Shepard's brows knit into a troubled look, remembering this. "Even once I had learned the collectors were protheans... your people." She slowly raised her eyes to meet his, a firm frown upon her face. "I felt justified in killing them. Like I was granting them rest - freeing them from being the reaper's puppets."  
  
She searched his unresponsive expression for acceptance. It was lacking either way. She was unaware of his recent enlightenment on the origins of the collectors, but he wasn't about to share that with her.   
  
Her pupils constricted as different shades of green flickered around them. "Cerberus will pay for unleashing reaper tech on innocent people and aiding the reapers in this war. I won't rest until everyone who has been harmed by the reapers is taken care of. And for that to happen, we must destroy ever last damn reaper."  
  
Javik nodded in agreement. " **The fallen all deserve vengeance** ," he returned peacefully.  
  
Shepard smiled warmly at him. All rage and fear had vacated her expression. He continued to stare into her eyes, his golden orbs boring through them. His narrowed as he carefully inspected hers. He was certain he could see blue rings around her pupils. It was likely implants, or repairs made by Cerberus when they revived her. He blinked slowly before shaking his head. "I should be the one thanking you, Commander."  
  
Shepard tilted her head, making her confusion very apparent. "Hmm?"  
  
"What you did to the collectors... for my people..." His eyes darted away, concerned he had revealed too much. She never mentioned she wiped them out. He cautiously looked back to her expectant face. "It was an act of mercy."    
  
Smiling back at him once again, he realized she didn't question him. There was too much on her mind to worry about the details of this. With a silent sigh of relief, he bowed his head. "Thank you again." He was grateful to be able to thank the woman who granted his people peace, and not just convey his feelings to the ships AI.   
  
She exchanged the gesture, but pangs of guilt consumed her immediately. She looked down at her trembling hands. The first beacon she interacted with back on Eden Prime came to her mind, clear as the day it happened. She felt incredible amounts of remorse and pain. Turning to leave, she bit her lip.  
  
"I'll see you down in the shuttle bay soon," she called back to him as she left. Retreating to the elevator, she prompted the car to take her to her own quarters.

 

-

 

  
Shepard backed up against the elevator wall while completely fixated on her hands. She shut her eyes hard and whimpered, swearing she could see her own five-fingered hands transform into something that resembled prothean hands.   
  
"You were supposed to help me, Mordin!," she screamed through tears. Her fists curled tightly before she slammed them into the floor. "You were supposed to figure out what was wrong with me." She grew quieter, her voice sounding more defeated with every word.   
  
"You were supposed to be here..."

 


	23. Gellix

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard encounters a former ally, which causes her to question herself.

Shepard and her team had landed on Gellix: a planet that was home to a Cerberus science lab. It was once a base that housed many researchers, scientists, modern technology, and priceless research. In recent events, it had become a sanctuary and bunker for former Cerberus scientists to continue their research without having to work under the organization. Shepard's mission was to extract them, though it was already proving to be a difficult task as Cerberus was already there attempting to reclaim what was once theirs.  
  
Despite enemy weapon fire spraying down the landing pad, Javik glared down Kaidan. He was beside Shepard, fully focused on defeating the Cerberus troopers before them. However, Javik would not turn his back to him, not even for a moment. He threw biotics carelessly down the stretch, giving no mind to the innocents who may get caught in the crossfire. As the last foe fell, Shepard motioned for them to move out. Kaidan followed at her heels as Javik lingered behind, rifle readied.

 

-

 

It turned out that one of Shepard's former crew members were there, and actually in charge of protecting these scientists who were brave enough to break free from Cerberus bonds. Former Alliance military - and Cerberus lackey - Jacob Taylor. Wounded before Shepard even set foot on the base, she expressed urgency in tending to his injuries. "We'll catch up later," she assured. Meanwhile, the trio explored the bunker.  
  
It was packed with interesting information. From research files kept away on data pads to microscopes left out with full briefs on what was beneath the lenses. Shepard made note to confiscate everything they could, or at least destroy it. Their priority was to retrieve the scientists, but there was no way she would allow anything that could potentially benefit Cerberus fall into their hands.  
  
Though Jacob was a welcome reunion, they bumped into someone else Shepard had not expected to see again in her lifetime: Dr. Gavin Archer.  
  
"Commander Shepard," he called out to her. She put her hand up to her face, pretending she did not see him. "Dr. Gavin Archer. We... met on Project Overlord." His voice grew heavy with regret and Shepard found she could not ignore him. He outstretched his hand as she approached, but she just crossed her arms and planted herself firmly just out of his arms reach.  
  
"That's one way of putting it," she sneered with a scowl.  
  
Dr. Archer lowered his hand and swayed nervously. "Yes, well, after you took my brother to Grissom Academy, I tried putting all that behind me." His tone seemed sincere enough, but Shepard did not let up on her unforgiving glare.  
  
Javik perked up at the mention of the school for gifted children. He pulled his eyes from Kaidan, who had his weapon put away, to inspect the scientist before them. Grissom Academy was the first mission he joined Shepard on. He blinked curiously, wondering if they were able to rescue this man's sibling.  
  
Archer twiddled his thumbs. "I don't suppose you have any news from there? I've heard rumors the Academy was in trouble."  
  
Shepard let him sweat it out for a moment before nodding, the man's shoulders slumping immediately as the tension freed. "I was at Grissom Academy. Cerberus tried abducting the students, but David's okay." She turned to Javik who seemed to be remembering their encounter with David. His focus returned to Kaidan after the connection was made in his mind. She frowned and faced the scientist once again.  
  
"Oh, thank god, Commander... you have no idea what that means," he said with a delighted grin.  
  
Shepard leaned forward and scolded him. "It's a little late to start worrying about his safety now."  
  
The smile faded from his face. "I never stopped," he said, genuinely apologetic. "I know you think I'm a monster. And you're right. Not a day goes by where my dreams aren't haunted by what I did to David." He paused, possibly forcing visions of his dreams upon himself as punishment. "All I can do now is hope that one day he forgives me."  
  
Shepard may have briefly felt sympathetic towards him, but she could not begin to fathom the nightmares it had given David. The nightmares he had to live through.  
  
"What are you doing here, anyway?" Shepard asked, trying her best not to sound as irritated as she felt by his presence.  
  
He waved at the console beside him. "I strayed too far from the path. This was my only refuge. As a boy, I wanted to be a scientist remembered for doing right by the world - curing a disease, or discovering a new element." He grinned proudly, his face beaming while temporarily engulfed in childhood nostalgia; however, it quickly faded. "Not a monster who tortured his own brother.  
  
Knowing their former boss would not have taken his leave lightly, she smirked. "What did you say to the Illusive Man?"  
  
Gavin's facial expression became very serious. "I told him if his intention was to work with the devil, he only had to look in the mirror. I wanted out of his nightmare."  
  
Shepard held back a chuckle. How she loved it when people told him off. "And he just let you go?"  
  
He looked around the room. "If it had been that easy, I wouldn't be hiding here. Every Cerberus soldier in the galaxy has orders to shoot me on sight."  
  
Shepard scoffed dismissively. People like him weren't easy to rid of. "Likewise," she replied before looking up the stairs a little ways off. She could see the med bay, where Jacob had been taken to. "I should go."  
  
"Commander," Dr. Archer called out as Shepard turned on her heel. "Thank you for saving David. Both times."  
  
She offered a nod before taking off, Kaidan and Javik following suit.

 

-

 

After speaking with Dr. Brynn Cole, the head scientist of the bunch, Shepard went to catch up with Jacob and check the progress on his injuries. She was a bit distressed after learning that not only were the scientists in danger of losing their lives to Cerberus, but also a handful of children and civilian families who had taken up refuge with them. It didn't bother Cerberus, or the Illusive Man, one bit who got caught in the crossfire. _Humanity first... Pahh_. It gave her all the more incentive to bring down Cerberus - as if she needed more.  
  
Sensing her mind's peril, Javik spoke. "There are still places in the galaxy left to hide," he assured. She turned around to flash him a grateful smile. "Our refugees perished. There was nowhere left to run." Her smile quickly faded and his eyes darted back to Kaidan who was waving them into the med bay.

Thankfully, Jacob wasn't too gravely injured. He sustained a bullet wound to his abdomen, but the doctor treating him assured Shepard he would be okay. The doctor dismissed herself.  
  
"Didn't think I'd find you here, Taylor," Shepard said playfully. "How have you been?"  
  
He chuckled, wincing from the pain of using his abdominal muscles. "This is crazy," he said through gritted teeth. "I didn't think I'd ever see you again."  
  
While nodding in agreement, she crossed her arms and looked around the room. "So, how'd you become a gun for hire anyway?"  
  
He shook his head, knowing they didn't have time to spare for the details. "Long story. It was an opportunity I couldn't resist for people I came to care about." He looked beyond the doorway. The scientists were pacing around the main corridor, frantically preparing for evacuation. "These are good people. Defending their ideals... I like it. I think I found what I'm meant to do." He sounded hopeful and confident. Shepard couldn't help but feel proud of him. When she was working with him, he never came across as a guy who had it all figured out. Not like the man before her today.  
  
"So, what's the story? How'd you end up working in a place like this?" She grinned in anticipation.  
  
"After we got back... well, things look different when you come back from a suicide mission alive." His tone completely shifted to something ominous and sorrowful. "So I quit Cerberus. I quit everything and I sat by the Mediterranean for a while." He let his mind explore the peacefully memories briefly before continuing, his voice much quieter. "That's when I lost track of you."  
  
"And what did all the fresh air and meditation teach you?" Though she tried to brush it off as a snarky rebuttal, she did sound moderately jealous.  
  
An inspired spark flickered in his umber-colored eyes. "That what I choose to fight for better mean something to me - that it comes from the heart."  
  
"We could use you," she reminded. The scientists would be under the protection of Admiral Hackett if the chose to help. His presence would just be redundant.  
  
While not wanting to completely disregard her, he attempted to make it clear he would not be fighting alongside her once more. "It's real tempting, Shepard, but I like where I'm at. I'm important to these people. I want a life. I want a family."  
  
She grinned, fancying the idea briefly before the destruction of Earth consumed her mind. "Sure, Jacob, I get that. I want that too. One day."  
  
Jacob stared back at her, mildly perplexed. "No, Shepard. The Normandy is your real love."  
  
Though his tone was entirely serious, the chill down her spine had her hoping he was merely teasing her. It was an unfair remark, despite the truth to it. The last few years her life had been devoted to making the world aware of the reapers while simultaneously thwarting their attacks. What choice did she have? Was it an option to walk away from it all and pursue a happier and less lonesome lifestyle? Her gaze sunk to the ground while her heart pounded in her ears.  
  
Attentive to her sudden somberness, he offered some words of reconciliation. "If these are our final days, I want to spend them protecting these people. Building a life." His peaceful tone encouraged her to regain eye contact with him once again. He didn't need to use words to convince her how much he truly cared for these people - Brynn specifically. They exchanged smiles before their reunion was interrupted by the bunker shaking. Crashes and explosions from outside rung throughout the room.  
  
"I should go and get those AA guns back online," she said, looking up at the wavering ceiling lights. "We'll be back."  
  
"Good luck, Shepard," Jacob called out as she hastily exited the room, followed by Kaidan and Javik.

 

-

 

After successfully reactivating the anti-aircraft guns that guarded the building, Shepard and her team assisted in preparing the scientists and refugees for evacuation. Prudently, Dr. Cole insisted the children and civilians take the first shuttle out. It didn't take long for the main corridor to clear out. With only a few scientists remaining, Shepard urged them to take everything they could and not leave anything behind for Cerberus to find.  
  
As those who remained scurried around the room overloading computers and grabbing data pads, a large crash sent tremors throughout the building once more. Cerberus had taken out one of the guns and promptly came bursting through the windows of the control station.  
  
"Get to the shuttles, now!" Shepard barked at Brynn and the others.  
  
Thankfully, only a few troops had penetrated the bunker. Javik and Kaidan made quick work of them as Shepard ushered everyone out. As the last soldier fell, the three rushed down the stairs towards the shuttle bay.

 

-

 

The massive steel doors opened before Shepard and her team. Shuttles that were filled to capacity raced out of the shuttle bay. The trio followed beneath them, firing at the Cerberus troopers who wasted no time attempting to take down the fleeing aircrafts. Kaidan and Shepard took cover behind a stack of toppled crates and Javik settled opposite of them. The building was soon surrounded by Cerberus forces to address the current threat. Shuttles continued to make their way off the base unnoticed with the firefight below them brewing.  
  
Kaidan overloaded generators hooked up to shield pylons between taking out a few soldiers with his weapon. Shepard set their foes alight with incinerates before ending their blazing misery with fatal gunshot wounds. Javik cut down a couple of soldiers with his particle rifle and paused. He watched Kaidan with caution; ready to change his aim at the blink of an eye. Every time his arm got a little closer to Shepard, his heart raced - preparing for a back-stab. A Cerberus guardian approached him: his electrified baton raised. As the armored man swung down to land it on Javik's head, he dropped his gun and launched his assailant with immense biotic force.  
  
" **Focus!** " Shepard barked from behind her sniper rifle before executing a perfect head shot on an enemy.  
  
Javik grumbled before picking his weapon up and returning to the fight. He vaulted over his cover, lifting any foes who dared get too close to him before slamming them violently into the ground. For the remainder of the battle, he continued to attack and kill his targets mercilessly.

 

-

 

Once the landing pad had been cleared, Jacob and the remaining Cerberus defects were able to provide safe transport for Shepard and her team. However, just as the shuttle landed, a horde of troopers flooded from the shuttle bay. Shepard urged Kaidan and Javik to get into the shuttle while she fired back at their pursuers. Their numbers were so great that even her swift and accurate attacks couldn't put a dent in the battalion. Recognizing the danger, Javik shot back at them from the shuttle doorway.  
  
An atlas from among the crowed fired at her. The massive round shook the ground, causing her feet to sweep out from beneath her. With Javik still unloading on the soldiers relentlessly, Brynn jumped from the safety of their transport and dragged Shepard inside it. Before the doors could even close, the shuttle took to the sky.  
  
"Out by the skin of our teeth again, hey Shepard?" Jacob chuckled as Shepard caught her breath. She panted with a nod, a smile, and an eye roll.  
  
Taking the opportunity to express her gratefulness, Brynn chimed in. "I was afraid we wouldn't get anyone out alive, but thanks to you, we got almost everyone. Thank you."  
  
Just as eager, Shepard jumped to business. "Dr. Cole, I have a request - one that you can't afford to turn down. I need your help against the reapers." Her experience with researching collector and reaper technology would be absolutely vital in the war effort; there was no denying that.  
  
"Without a doubt... I am at your service," the scientist answered without an ounce of doubt or hesitation. "And I'm sure you can count on the others as well."  
  
To which, she turned to Jacob. "You too, Jacob. I need you."  
  
"Of course, but I wouldn't mind staying with these folks." He spoke enthusiastically though with a stern expression.  
  
Confused, Shepard blinked slowly. "You don't want to join us on the Normandy?"  
  
"I'm torn, Shepard," he replied glumly. "Looking out for these families is important to me."  
  
The two stared at each other for a while. He was in a completely different place than she, and this mission had made that very clear to her. All she could think of - all she had time for, really - was the war. The means to end it did not cross her mind, nor her future once it was over. Was it that she didn't believe the war could ever end in her life time? Had she already accepted her fate: the galaxy's fate? Dark clouds of regret formed in her eyes. _Who's really living life here?_  
  
"I hope you can see that," Jacob's voice shattered her sullen thoughts.  
  
Shepard smiled bitterly; the remorse still lingering in her mind. "Keep them safe, then," she said, accepting his decision. "We need everyone we can get working on the Crucible."  
  
"You got it." Jacob flashed her a grateful smile.  
  
The ride back to the Normandy was very quiet from that point on. Shepard's gaze fixated on the cold floor. Jacob and Dr. Cole sat next to each other holding hands with completely relaxed and content posture. Kaidan watched the sky grow dark around them through the front window as they entered space. Javik found moments to pull his glare from Kaidan to check on Shepard. He found the sudden change in demeanor troublesome, but not enough to distract him from waiting for the biotic human to slip up. His pupils darted back to Kaidan, narrowing at the sight of him.

 


	24. Regrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jacob's words linger in Shepard's mind. Her ties to the prothean race still perplex her. She seeks out comfort, but will it help?

With the former Cerberus scientists and Jacob shipped off to the Crucible, Shepard looked over the map of the galaxy from her perch in the CIC. She charted their path, marking everywhere they needed to go.   
  
Her mind was still filled with questions and doubts. It would be a while before they would reach their next destination and she needed to find a way to occupy herself. She tilted her head, staring at the holographic projection before her. Shoving her depressing self-evaluation aside, she remembered what had been bothering her earlier: her prothean predicament. Visions of the beacons flooded her thoughts. She huffed angrily and shut her eyes hard. _With Mordin gone, there is only one other person who may be able to give me the answers I need_.   
  
She inhaled deeply before reopening her eyes, marching to the elevator without an ounce of uncertainty.

 

-

 

  
As Shepard approached the port cargo hold doors, she could hear voices from inside. Curiously, she walked very slowly towards the room while trying to eavesdrop. However, her movement triggered the doors to slide open, blowing her cover. Javik was alone in the room and had not turned away from his water basins. Assuming he had not noticed her yet, she crept in silently.  
  
"You and the human called Jacob were both a part of Cerberus?" Javik's head was down, watching the water weave seamlessly through his fingers.  
  
"That is correct," EDI answered through the comm.  
  
"And Cerberus is filled with traitors to humanity?" His tone grew more snide with each word that left his mouth.  
  
"Yes, they oppose us in this war," EDI continued.  
  
The water in the bins splashed as he pushed his hands to the bottom. "Then why should we trust either of you?"  
  
She offered an explanation, but even Shepard could tell she was getting tired of his subtle presumptions. "We have severed our ties with the organization."  
  
"But you were programmed by Cerberus?" He pulled his hands from the water and gripped the lip of the table, propping against it.  
  
"I can extrapolate where this is going. I have superseded my original programming and have chosen to oppose Cerberus." She had become bored with his game.   
  
"You mean you have chosen to oppose your creators," he riposted with a snarl.  
  
"Correct." Despite being a machine, she still sounded snark.  
  
Javik turned his head just enough to catch Shepard in his peripheral view. After pushing away from the water tables, his shoulders slouched while his posture reached a relaxed presence. "I find this a very troubling freedom, machine. That is all."  
  
Shepard neared him, walking as casually as she could to ward off suspicion of her snooping.  
  
She gave an uncomfortable smile as he turned around to face her. "I see you two are getting along well," she noted sarcastically.  
  
He did not seem amused by her comment. A frown remained on his lips. He looked her over while crossing his arms and leaning back against the table. "The EDI machine revealed to me that you were once allied with Cerberus. You worked for them."  
  
Caught off guard, her eyes widened. She found it odd that EDI would disclose this information to him of all people, but brushed it off while preparing an explanation. Assuming she just missed this part of their conversation, she would be completely unaware that Javik had learned this a while she was on Omega.  
  
Her brows lowered as did the corners of her lips as she began to speak. "Yes... they... recruited me to look into human colonies disappearing." She recollected the events leading up to the circumstances of her alliance with them. She winced, remembering her death as though it had just happened. Shaking her head to remove the tragic moment from her thoughts, she balled her fists. "Everyone else that had the power to help them denied them. The Illusive Man knew I would be their only hope - humanity's only hope." She paused, letting her fingers unfurl. "But as the mission went on and we discovered more about the origin of the abductions, I began to realize we had completely different motives. He knew what he was sending us all in to and he knew the collectors belonged to the reapers... Which..." Her voice grew quiet as her words trailed. She tilted her head and looked at him with an inquisitive expression.  
  
Javik realized she began to put pieces together. He had disclosed earlier that he knew she brought the destruction of the collectors; which went hand in hand with her Cerberus association. He quickly turned away to avert his flustered gaze and focused on his reflection in the clear water. In an attempt to deter her from prying, he confided in her. " **I trust you, Commander, when you say you no longer expedite Cerberus's goals**."  
  
She grinned triumphantly, knowing well that earning his trust was not something to be taken lightly. The moment was short-lived; however, as Javik sighed while rubbing his hand on his forehead.  
  
" **Is there something you needed, Commander**?" Though he likely didn't intend to, he rubbed off as inconvenienced.  
  
Shepard shifted uneasily. She came to him confidently in search of answers, but her brief moment of embarrassment caused all her doubts to flare up once more. Flexing her fingers as if preparing herself, she searched her mind for the right questions. "Why can I speak Prothean?" she blurted out. Hearing her voice, she compared it to that of a suborn child asking why she had to go to bed. She restrained herself from wanting to bury her face in her hands.  
  
Javik turned around and shrugged. His gaze was dull and disinterested. "How should I know?"  
  
Her checks reddened and she looked away from him. _Right, how would he know_? Seeking to mask her humiliation, she offered clues aloud. "Well, on Feros, I met a creature called Thorian. It had survived into our cycle." She peaked up at him. The blank expression on his face made it seem improbable that he knew of the creature. "Indirectly, it gave me a cipher. The cipher was supposed to help me understand the beacons. The visions still weren't clear after receiving it."  
  
Javik crossed his arms as Shepard pace around the room. She may as well have been talking to herself at that point, as it was beyond him. He merely observed her quietly.  
  
"And then on Ilos, I could understand something in the consoles left behind. No one else could. So maybe that was Prothean." Her voice raised as she reached her revelation and then looked back to him. "The visions on Eden Prime when we went to find you, too. I understood all of that." Her brows crinkled as she frowned. "But before that I couldn't speak it. I never even thought of it. Not one word in your language ever just popped up in my mind." She searched his face, eyes demanding an answer.  
  
He shrugged once again and shook his head. "And what use is a dead people's language to you?" His tone was bereft of any comforting emotion.  
  
Shepard took a step back, rubbing her arm while looking down with defeat. He thought of how pathetic she had looked in this moment - _what does it matter_? He rolled his eyes and approached her. His fingers wrapped around her shoulders firmly. She brought her eyes up slowly to meet his. " **Do you think it has something to do with a prothean to speak it to**?"  
  
The unamused expression on his face did not offer her any consolation. With nearly no medical or scientific background, he had solved her dilemma with just a few words. His answer was too obvious for her to accept and with him choosing to continue to speak to her in his language, she felt as though he was mocking her - or looking to get some sort of reaction out of her. She looked back to the ground in dismay.  
  
Javik loosened his grip and let his arms fall back to his side, brushing her hands along the way. It sent a tingle down her spine, causing her to flinch. He examined her face, remembering how upset she looked on the shuttle earlier that day. Exhaling sharply, he found himself becoming increasingly annoyed with his concern for her. "What has been bothering you today?" He tried not to sound too vexed - which came naturally for him.  
  
She hesitated, biting on her lip. Her brows arched and she closed her eyes for a moment. "What Jacob said," she murmured. "About fighting for something more than just the greater good. Fighting for something - _someone_."  
  
Though her eyes remained focused on the ground, Javik averted his gaze; anticipating she would look at him with her sad, emerald eyes. He thought back to her conversation with the Cerberus traitor earlier that day. It had been troublesome for him to recall, as he was primarily fixated on Kaidan during that time.  
  
Her eyes began to wonder. "I've seen so many soldiers who's loved ones have died in this war, and even wars prior. I can't help but wonder - is it really worth it?" Cortez came to mind, who had lost his husband in a collector attack. While she was doing everything in her power to help him move on and be happy, he still wore his immense loss on his chest. "I've been in the military for most of my life; I've never really thought what would come after. Once I don't have the reapers to obsess over, what will I do?"  
  
Their eyes finally met once again - hers filled with confusion and his with resentment. "My sole purpose is to destroy the reapers," he reminded her. "Nothing more. And when they are all finally dead, what future do I have here?" He seemed to ridicule her remorseful thoughts, but she understood she was selfish to seek him for consolation in this matter.  
  
"I have just been thinking about this for a while," she replied, attempting to dismiss him before it got worse. "That's all."  
  
He shook his head in disapproval. "You do not have time for thoughts like this."  
  
"That's the point!" she exclaimed. "That's always my thinking. I keep pushing it off and before I have time for myself, I'm thrown into some new predicament. It's a never-ending cycle."  
  
"The only future I've considered is the one where the reapers meet their end by my hands. That has not changed since I have been brought to your cycle." He bared his teeth with a scowl, making her feel powerless.  
  
Her heart ached for him. She had hoped that she could show him he could find a place in this cycle, but he made it seem like a lost cause. She questioned herself; wondering if she wasn't trying hard enough or she hadn't given him enough reason. Though maybe it was simply he was just too suborn to search for something beyond killing reapers. This speculation caused her to fill with rage, glaring at him with a piercing glare. "Fine," she said, her throat beginning to sting. "I'll worry about it after the war."  
  
She tore from his quarters, not permitting him another word.

 


	25. Trust and Forgiveness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Shepard's attention falls elsewhere, Javik starts to look inward.

Some time had passed since Shepard and Javik had argued about the future. The two hadn't talked much since. The crew had become very busy - rushing around the galaxy to extinguish reaper and Cerberus threats all the same. In between the fights, Shepard had sought comfort in Kaidan: someone who's aspirations were similar to her own.  
  
Javik had grown bored of keeping constant watch of the human. He seemed to realize that if Kaidan were to betray Shepard once again, he would have done so already. His focus shifted back to their missions at hand. No longer getting frequent visits from Shepard, he continued to keep to himself in his quarters.

 

-

 

  
Javik, Kaidan, and Shepard returned to the Normandy after an intense and combat heavy mission. Shepard and Kaidan turned over their gear for the night while Javik lingered in the shadows of the shuttle bay, pretending to be interested in the stacked crates that lined the room. He listened from a safe distance as the two humans spoke.  
  
"Want to catch some drinks later?" Kaidan asked, nudging her arm.  
  
She winced and rubbed the area he touched, still a bit sore from earlier. "I've got to get a brief from the Admiral and wash up." He frowned playfully with a dramatic arch as she yawned. Giving in to his pitiful expression, she sighed and rolled her eyes with a grin. "I suppose I can afterwards. I'll meet you in the lounge."  
  
He smiled giddily as they headed toward the elevator. Javik had watched the door close behind them. He looked down at his hands in disgust: disgust for the filth that had accumulated during their mission, for Shepard's blind trust in the male human, or something else that he didn't care to admit. He clenched his fists hard; his fingers burrowing into the flesh of his palms. Letting out a long and defeated exhale, he decided the time had come to retreat to his room once more.

 

-

 

Several hours had passed since their return. After thoroughly scrubbing all traces of markers and grime from his hands, Javik still found himself troubled. No matter how many times he attempted to dismiss it, his last conversation with Shepard kept forming in his mind. He found himself wondering what he would do if he did survive to see the end of this war. Never able to manifest even the slightest idea, his thoughts would turn to how upset she had become. Most troubling to him; however, was how much time she had been spending with their newest addition to the crew. He was convinced that if she was not so quick to forgive or trust, she may have never come to regret not thinking about a future for herself. She would be as ruthless as he was and there would be no room for second guessing. These assumptions and forced images of her only caused him to fall into wonder once again.  
  
With a tight grip on the edge of the water table, he shook his head as to free the thoughts from his mind. He knew he could not win the battle inside of his head, so he submitted to himself. He would seek her out in an attempt to find some closure.

 

-

 

Javik was unsure if Shepard would still be in the lounge so late, but he approached with caution anyway. He stilled in his tracks as he heard her distinctive buoyant and bubbly laughter. He already felt calmer just knowing she was no longer in the dark place she had fallen to previously. However, the sound of Kaidan's voice caused his body to tense and his skin to crawl. He glared at the door so rigidly, it was as if he believed he could see through the thick metal.  
  
Though their conversation was muffled, Javik listened in carefully. His evolved senses were more heightened than his humans targets. The more he heard; however, the more conflicted he became.  
  
"So, I hope you don't mind me asking," inquired Kaidan, "but what did you mean back on the Citadel?"  
  
There was a pause before he could hear Shepard's perplexed response. "You mean about why I chose you on Virmire?"  
  
"Yeah, that..." he replied heavily, as if he regretted bringing it up.  
  
"It was a hard decision," she began, her voice noticeably sorrowful. "It didn't boil down to who I thought was better, or who made fewer mistakes." She sighed. "Even if she was a bit reckless and xenophobic."  
  
Kaidan chuckled and agreed.  
  
"I saw great potential in both of you. She could easily have become a spectre as well. But like I said, I knew you. I knew I could count on you - trust you. I meant that."  
  
Even Javik could detect the sincerity in Shepard's tone. He clutched his chest where a dull ache grew. He felt an unfamiliar fear: not one for his own safety, or even hers. It was something completely foreign to him.  
  
"Even when I had allied with Cerberus," she continued, "I knew you still had faith in me. You trusted me enough to not question my motives. You saw beyond the lies that were being whispered about me. And when you were ready, you were able to forgive me." It grew silent for a while. Javik leaned in to hear her suddenly quiet voice. "I don't think Ashley would have been capable of that sort of forgiveness."  
  
Trust and faith. Forgiveness. These things were important to her and, from what Javik could collect, ultimately made her decision when it came to saving a life. He went through her list, tapping on his fingers as he checked off each one. _Trust and faith_. It wasn't too long ago that he told her he trusted her, even if she was unaware just how much he truly knew about her history with Cerburs. He had faith in her to bring their enemies to their knees and extinguish the reaper threat. He nodded, finding this sufficient. _Forgiveness_. He bit his lip and looked up at the ceiling while leaning back against the wall. This one proved to be difficult for him: for what did he have to forgive her for? Bringing Kaidan on _her_  ship? Her brief weakness while she contemplated her future? _No_. He began to feel selfish in thinking he would need to forgive her for these things. Selfishness was not one of the things she had mentioned before. In fact, everything seemed quite the opposite. He winced as the pain in his chest grew. _What is this_? He began to fear she was rubbing off on him too much.  
  
  
A chair's legs scraping against the ground caused his eyes to dart towards the door.  
  
"You know what? I think we need a refill." Kaidan's voice caused Javik's heart to race. He could hear his footsteps nearing. Maintaining a quick yet casual pace, he made his way over to the galley and sat at the vacant table just as Kaidan made his way though the lounge doors.  
  
"I swear, this will be my last one! I need to catch some sleep," Shepard called out before the doors closed.

 

-

 

Kaidan approached the counter and reached behind it. Javik leaned back in his chair, threw his feet up on the table, and crossed his arms while sighing heavily. He may have been attempting to provoke the human, but even he was unaware of his true intentions. Kaidan took notice to him sitting so nonchalantly. He approached with a bottle in each hand and looked around the empty room. Looking confused through Javik's frosty glare, he cleared his throat and spoke quietly.  
  
"I know you this ship is only so large, and I hate to jump to conclusions... but have to been following me?"  
  
Javik remained silent with his relentless gaze.  
  
Attempting to mask how intimidated he began to feel, Kaidan rubbed his head with his knuckle, the contents of the bottle gently swishing around. "I mean, I know you've been watching me when we are out on our missions - that hasn't gone unnoticed." Their eye contact did not falter. Kaidan seemed to be holding his breath in anticipation. He was unsure if he'd get a response - or a knife held to his throat.  
  
"Do not flatter yourself, primitive," Javik finally said, completely monotone. "I simply do not trust you as our commander does." He waved his hand dismissively and turn his head away.  
  
For some reason, Kaidan did not appear to expect this answer. He took a step back and suppressed a surprised scoff. "I apologize for the first impression. I can't express enough how much I regret doubting Shepard even the slightest. But she understood where I was coming from." He spoke calmly while watching Javik cautiously, still a bit suspicious of his motives.  
  
His statement caught Javik's attention, his eyes widening. Recently, he had realized how little Shepard understood where _he_  was coming from, and vise versa. They barely understood each other at all, frankly. He looked at the ground with a pained frown, finally coming to the conclusion that the ache in his chest as jealousy. _Jealousy is such a primitive emotion. A stupid one. This will get you killed on the battlefield. The Reapers will not show mercy for the weak and pitiful._ He closed his eyes, trying to repress this revelation.  
  
"If you want, you can join us for drinks," Kaidan offered hesitantly. "Shepard said she was going to bed soon, but I'm sure she'd stay up a bit longer with another ear to talk off."  
  
Javik did not look up at him. "No," he replied dryly.  
  
Kaidan lingered breifly, in case he wanted to change his mind or attack him. He decided it was not best to keep his company waiting too much. "Alright, well, have a good night," he said cordially before leaving the galley to return to Shepard.  



	26. Trust and Forgiveness: Part Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part two.

Javik remained at the table in the galley for some time. He was waiting for the lounge doors to open once more, signaling Shepard's retreat to her private quarters. Preoccupied with his thoughts and new found emotions, each passing minute felt like torture. He battled amongst himself: swapping from denial and rage to recognition and assessment. He found he was completely lost, never having need or time for such sentiments.  
  
The Normandy, though swift for this cycle, still offered more time between battles than he grew accustomed to. Arguably, the war was still very young as well. It offered too much time to think. He attempted to revisit his time: from the sights, sounds and smells to how he felt then. It proved futile. As images formed before him, they blurred just as quickly. The furthest back he could think of clearly was when he was re-awoken on Eden Prime... and the first face he saw. He sighed, wondering what he would say to her when the opportunity came.  
  
As the sound of doors hissing open echoed through the silent ship, Javik shot up, bringing his mind to a halt.  
  
"Be prepared for tomorrow," Shepard called out to Kaidan as their footsteps receded from each other. "We don't know for sure what's going on out there."  
  
"Will do, Commander," Kaidan replied following a yawn. "Sleep well."  
  
The elevator pinged as the crew's quarter's doors opened and closed. When Javik was certain the hall was empty, he left the galley. Making his way to the elevator, the walls seemed to grow. For once, he felt mildly anxious. He wondered if this was how Shepard felt nearly every time she had come to him to speak to him about something not related to the war. Her nerves practically stunk up the place, though it never bothered him. With an unsteady hand, he prompted the elevator to bring him to her cabin.

 

-

 

Javik stood before the door for a couple of minutes. He noticed the lack of any sound from movement inside. Speculating she may have already fallen asleep, he recalled the first time he barged in on her unannounced. He decided he should 'knock' on the door frame, as she had done a few times before entering his quarters. Closing his eyes and taking a slow and deep breath in, he rapped to the right of the door with the back of his knuckles.  
  
"Yes...?" Shepard called from behind the door groggily.  
  
Javik neared the door's opening, allowing them to part. Shepard was sitting at her desk, her sweatshirt hanging on the back of her chair. Her rosy cheeks and sleeveless shirt indicated she must have been feeling warm. Heeding this, Javik placed the back of his hand to her head. She looked up at him, puzzled.  
  
"Are you feeling well?" he asked before removing his hand.  
  
An awkward smile crept up her flush cheeks. "Oh, I'm fine. Just exhausted and had some drinks," she admitted. "That always gets me a little warm." Picking up on his distress, her grin faded. "What's going on?" she asked, genuinely worried.  
  
For once, his eyes reflected sorrow and lacked their bitter hardness. He looked away as her face grew pale. Unable to find words, the room became silent once again.  
  
"Javik?" Shepard spoke softly and stood up slowly from her desk chair.  
  
He closed his eyes hard and exhaled sharply before returning eye contact with her. "I just...."  
  
Her emerald eyes quivered, waiting impatiently for him to continue. It made it that more difficult for him. The ache in his chest returned and took hold on his throat. He recalled this helpless look before from when she turned to him in her moment of weakness. His fingers curled against the palms of his hands and he swallowed, trying to push the pain down. He would not leave her the way he did the last time.  
  
"I wanted to apologize," he finally choked out.  
  
Shepard's brow arched. "For?"  
  
He searched for the correct words. "For being so dismissive the last time we spoke."  
  
She frowned and crossed her arms, her gaze falling to the ground. Remembering the events that he was referring to, she had begun to feel cold. "Oh..." The silence crept back around them.  
  
Javik thought back to the conversation he was eavesdropping on earlier. Kaidan had asked her to explain, or elaborate on something she had stated earlier. He wondered if maybe this was what she needed to offer her forgiveness. He winced at the thought.  
  
"I do not know why you can speak Prothean," he began, holding back the irritation that built up inside of him. "As I told you and the asari, I was not a scientist. Just a warrior. Like you." Her eyes slowly crept back up to meet his. They were filled with the same fear and confusion as the last time they discussed this. "And I..." He rubbed his shoulder and looked away, having no desire to see her disappointment. "I never had time to consider a future as you have. In my cycle, it was merely a distraction. Empty hope." His voice was heavy with sorrow. "Had I expected my future would contain something other than my own death and that of the reapers, it could have been possible that I would have had similar thoughts," he admitted. He closed his eyes and waited for her reaction.  
  
"Alright," Shepard said quietly. "Then I also apologize."  
  
He opened his eyes quickly and looked back to her just as promptly. She was smiling, eyes void of any uncertainty or sadness. His mouth partially agape, she chuckled at his display of confusion.  
  
"For being selfish," she clarified. "I should have dumped my self-loathing on someone else." She rolled her eyes playfully, but his blank expression reflected his bewilderment. "Had I taken more consideration of where you had come from, we would have never argued about it." She grabbed Javik's hand, engulfed in an overwhelming urge to do so. Her brain tingled. " **What you do with your future is your business. No one can take that from you. Not the reapers, and not me.** "  
  
His eyes now shone peacefully. She took in his relaxed golden gaze and smiled warmly before inhaling deeply and closing her eyes.  
  
Javik's voice rang through her head. ' _Fear is a biological marker_.' Then, she saw him in the galley; sitting and staring blankly at the table. She became enveloped in all of his emotions and thoughts at that time. _Primitive emotions. Primitive human. This human is undeserving. Immature sensory organs... A touch grants nothing but a momentary and meaningless sensation. I would never question her loyalties. Threaten her. Betray her_. As quickly as the image appeared before her, it faded.  
  
Shepard opened her eyes gently and pulled away from him, watching his face for any suspicion while also hiding her own surprise. She suppressed a taunting grin. "Can you forgive me?" she asked, putting her hands on her hips.  
  
He tilted his head. This was not how the scenarios in his mind played out earlier. He pictured himself nearly begging for her forgiveness and having it not be enough. Now, she stood before him, asking _him_  for forgiveness. "Of course," he said with a nod. "And would you forgive me?" He bit his lip, still expecting her to deprive him of it.  
  
"Of course," she mimicked. Overcome with exhaustion of her body and now mind, her hand met her head. "I should really get to bed."  
  
Javik took a step back and looked over to her bed. Ebony silk sheets lined the king sized bed. He noted it was quite large for a single person. He turned back to her and nodded again. "Rest well, Commander." He began to leave.  
  
"You too," she replied. "Tomorrow is going to be a big day." As the doors opened, he peered at her from behind his shoulder. "We're going to recruit the quarian fleet." She grinned mischievously at him before approaching her bed, anticipating she'd drift to sleep as soon as her head hit the pillows.  
  
Javik retreated to the elevator, facing the closing doors with a triumphant smile. _Forgiveness._ He tapped his finger before commanding the console to take him to his floor.  



End file.
